Telling her it's really over - Is this the right way to go about it?

[tb24]

Although we broke up she wants me back and I was confused myself about what I really wanted so I gave off mixed signals and she thinks there's a chance of getting back together. I've realised i was right to break it off even though emotions were running high when we broke up.

 

I'm going round hers tonight. We broke up on friday after an argument and I haven't seen her since, I've sent her a few texts which perhaps was a mistake. However, I made sure she's ok with seeing me tonight. She doesn't understand why it's over and she deserves to know and she needs to know there's no chance of getting back together.

 

Before I go round should I text her to make sure she's still ok with me going over?

 

My intention is to explain why I can't be with her, without resulting to pointing out her flaws if I can help it. Then let her vent if she needs to.

 

If at any point she asks me to leave, I will, I'm not going to try and console her as I think that would give the wrong impression.

 

One complication: I have some stuff (clothes and dvds mainly) around there. Should I pick it up?

 

I'm of 2 minds. In some ways she probably doesn't want me going round her flat packing my stuff up and would rather be on her own.

 

On the other hand, not having my stuff there means I don't need to go back at a later date and she wont have my stuff there reminding her of me.

 

any advice? I know this is a bit frivilous but for both my and her sakes I want her to be able to move on

[dreamingoftigers]

I am sure that you have learned this the hard way by now, but get out quicker and let them heal. Give them space, don't mix things up or give them hope and don't check up on them. Get your stuff and own your decision to not look back.