J_A24 Posted November 9, 2010 Posted November 9, 2010 To make it short, I deeply loved my friend, a girl, let's call her A and she loved one of my friends ,a guy, B. I lied to B when he asked if I had feelings for A...I did it because I didn't want to be the reason for them not being together and unhappy. I went on to being their friend for a bit over a year, trying to crush what was killing me inside. I came to have a very intimate friendship with A, to the point of her often initiating physical contact. Which wrongly lead me on to confuse it with flirting...and loving her even more. I was there for her when she cried, when they fought, I was her ''big brother''. I cut contact with the two of them for almost 3 years,it was hard because I couldnt get over A and B's friendship ended for good (im not interested at re-kindling the friendship) and they've each resurfaced, B wants to hang out, I never answer the calls. A and I met not so long ago, we exchanged numbers, but we haven't talked. And I still love her, but she's still wih him...(next post)
Author J_A24 Posted November 9, 2010 Author Posted November 9, 2010 B cheated on A and she doesn't know to this day. I was furious when B told me that, I felt like my suffering was in vain. All this time I never told anyone and kept this feeling inside, but I KNOW I have to move on... When A and I found eachother by coincidence after 3 years of no contact, tears rolled down her face, she was fighting not to cry, since she felt she lost her confident in me 3 years ago with no call, and now, we were just two very different persons.She told me that she felt like I knew her, but she didn't know me. We talked about our future, about what we wanted to do in life...I asked her if everything was going well with B, she just nodded in approval on what I believe was uncertainty or a discomfort in me asking that question...''Maybe she knew how I really felt, maybe she knows'' That's what I said in my mind. But does it matter? Not when the one that you want doesn't want you too... I have to move on, I will. But I promise to never leave my feelings unspoken ever again.
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