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Does this relationship sound like it will work?

Kain Highwind

By Kain Highwind
in Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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1. They've been friends for about five years before getting together

2. She's rather religious. He isn't.

3. She thinks sex is nasty (never had it). He loves it.

4. He's the kind of guy that hangs around and flirts with alot of women. She broke up with her ex before because he ignored her

 

I just have a feeling...

fun2bewith Established Member

fun2bewith

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1. They've been friends for about five years before getting together

2. She's rather religious. He isn't.

3. She thinks sex is nasty (never had it). He loves it.

4. He's the kind of guy that hangs around and flirts with alot of women. She broke up with her ex before because he ignored her

 

I just have a feeling...

 

Points 2 and 3 might not be a big factor.

Only one big thing: "they have been friends for about five years" It can work...

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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Points 2 and 3 might not be a big factor.

Only one big thing: "they have been friends for about five years" It can work...

It can work as in it may work out between them or it may work in my favor?

 

I've known alot of people that have gotten together after that long and none of them lasted longer than a month or two

fun2bewith Established Member

fun2bewith

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It can work as in it may work out between them or it may work in my favor?

 

I've known alot of people that have gotten together after that long and none of them lasted longer than a month or two

 

It may work out with them but it might also just be temporary...

Do not compare yourself to him or her...Know what strenght you have and then continue building your confidence level on that strenght...Work with what you got...In the 90's the leaning tower of Pisa almost colaped...every engineer tried to support the part of the structure that was already sinking into the ground(focusing only on the weak part) and it failed numerous time. One engineer sugested that hanging a weight on the opposite side the non-sinking side(focusing on the strenght they already had). What do you think happend? The weight added to the positive side stabilized the tower...If they added more weight they could actually make the tower totally vertical... So focus on the positive you have and work on that... A recent study has shown that religious couples have stronger connection with each other than none religious ones..and the fact that she needs to have attention all the time, might push her to go to someone that will give it to her...or she might get sick of the attention after a while..

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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It may work out with them but it might also just be temporary...

Do not compare yourself to him or her...Know what strenght you have and then continue building your confidence level on that strenght...Work with what you got...In the 90's the leaning tower of Pisa almost colaped...every engineer tried to support the part of the structure that was already sinking into the ground(focusing only on the weak part) and it failed numerous time. One engineer sugested that hanging a weight on the opposite side the non-sinking side(focusing on the strenght they already had). What do you think happend? The weight added to the positive side stabilized the tower...If they added more weight they could actually make the tower totally vertical... So focus on the positive you have and work on that... A recent study has shown that religious couples have stronger connection with each other than none religious ones..and the fact that she needs to have attention all the time, might push her to go to someone that will give it to her...or she might get sick of the attention after a while..

I want them to split up (but at the same time I don't because that would make her upset and I want her to be happy. Love is weird lol) but I just can't tell if its off to a good start or not lol

fun2bewith Established Member

fun2bewith

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I want them to split up (but at the same time I don't because that would make her upset and I want her to be happy. Love is weird lol) but I just can't tell if its off to a good start or not lol

 

 

You make me smile! Cause I had the same feeling about my x-girlfriend...(I can relate). You don't want her to get hurt by him, you want her to learn a lesson without her getting hurt...You want her to make better judgement in the future you want her to open her eyes and see that he is no good for her...When you focus your energy on them all the time, you are going to strugle letting go...She also might run to him as a rebound or she is still young and needs to make some mistakes, he is the friend and he is there for her...but once that feeling is satisfied she might realize that what she is doing is a mistake...Most of the time they do realize it...But the first 88 days, you will not have much control...maybe after that, you will have more...

Edited by fun2bewith
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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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You make me smile! Cause I had the same feeling about my x-girlfriend...(I can relate). You don't want her to get hurt by him, you want her to learn a lesson without her getting hurt...You want her to make better judgement in the future you want her to open her eyes and see that he is no good for her...When you focus your energy on them all the time, you are going to strugle letting go...She also might run to him as a rebound or she is still young and needs to make some mistakes, he is the friend and he is there for her...but once that feeling is satisfied she might realize that what she is doing is a mistake...Most of the time they do realize it...But the first 88 days, you will not have much control...maybe after that, you will have more...

Why 88 days?

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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And I just wanna say that I wanna get with her lol

D-Lish Established Member

D-Lish

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Anyone that thinks sex is nasty is going to have a hard time making a romantic relationship work with anyone.

 

If you want to "get with her", doesn't the fact that she thinks sex is nasty pose an issue for you???

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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Anyone that thinks sex is nasty is going to have a hard time making a romantic relationship work with anyone.

 

If you want to "get with her", doesn't the fact that she thinks sex is nasty pose an issue for you???

Well, sex would be nice and for any other girl I liked, it'd be a problem, but I just have such strong feelings for her that sex can come later. I just wanna be with her more than anything :/

D-Lish Established Member

D-Lish

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Well, sex would be nice and for any other girl I liked, it'd be a problem, but I just have such strong feelings for her that sex can come later. I just wanna be with her more than anything :/

 

 

Well, have you told her how you feel???

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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Well, have you told her how you feel???

I asked her out on a date but that was the day after her first date with her boyfriend

 

Go look at my topic on the main dating board to see how I feel and my situation (its really alot to explain >_>)

D-Lish Established Member

D-Lish

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Okay, I've read your backstory with her.

 

Is it possible she's going to change her mind and one day realize that you're the one and only? It's possible, she's only 19. But it's not happening now.

 

You're living your life putting all your eggs into one basket. Loving someone from afar is an obsession- and that's what you are- obsessed. Obsessed to the point where you aren't enjoying, or participating in your own life.

 

When you like someone so much that you don't pay attention to your own life, you lose yourself.

 

At this particular juncture, it's more important than ever to pay attention to your own pursuits, interests, etc.

 

You're clutching to the notion that she's going to come around and miraculousy decide you're what she really wants...So your current status in life is set to "waiting". Waiting is limbo, and it's no way to live your life. A friend zone is a really hard place to recover from.

 

As long as you think this girl is the only thing that can ever make your life complete, and as long as you internalize that she's going to come around someday- you're wasting your own precious life waiting. Stop waiting- and live.

 

That's the best advice I can give. I give you that advice having been there when I was younger. When you feel so strongly for someone, you can fool yourself into believing that because you feel something so strongly- that it has to be right- it has to be fate. In reality it's just a feeling, your feeling.

 

What you're ignoring is that living your own life for you would probably make you more attractive. Not just to her, but to any woman that is out there.

 

You're stuck right now- the best thing you could do for yourself is to unstick yourself.

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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Okay, I've read your backstory with her.

 

Is it possible she's going to change her mind and one day realize that you're the one and only? It's possible, she's only 19. But it's not happening now.

 

You're living your life putting all your eggs into one basket. Loving someone from afar is an obsession- and that's what you are- obsessed. Obsessed to the point where you aren't enjoying, or participating in your own life.

 

When you like someone so much that you don't pay attention to your own life, you lose yourself.

 

At this particular juncture, it's more important than ever to pay attention to your own pursuits, interests, etc.

 

You're clutching to the notion that she's going to come around and miraculousy decide you're what she really wants...So your current status in life is set to "waiting". Waiting is limbo, and it's no way to live your life. A friend zone is a really hard place to recover from.

 

As long as you think this girl is the only thing that can ever make your life complete, and as long as you internalize that she's going to come around someday- you're wasting your own precious life waiting. Stop waiting- and live.

 

That's the best advice I can give. I give you that advice having been there when I was younger. When you feel so strongly for someone, you can fool yourself into believing that because you feel something so strongly- that it has to be right- it has to be fate. In reality it's just a feeling, your feeling.

 

What you're ignoring is that living your own life for you would probably make you more attractive. Not just to her, but to any woman that is out there.

 

You're stuck right now- the best thing you could do for yourself is to unstick yourself.

I get what you're saying but I'm pretty much going through life like I was before all this happened. I'm still doing everything I did before and really, my life isn't any different. I hate to relate it to a movie but its like Forrest Gump. He lived his life but he just thought aobut the girl from time to time (Except I'm not naming a boat after her lol).

 

I'm trying to find other girls, partly to move on, and to show that my life doesn't revolve around her.

Jannah Established Member

Jannah

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1. They've been friends for about five years before getting together

2. She's rather religious. He isn't.

3. She thinks sex is nasty (never had it). He loves it.

4. He's the kind of guy that hangs around and flirts with alot of women. She broke up with her ex before because he ignored her

 

I just have a feeling...

 

Feelings for her aside, I think you need to not concern yourself, with the details of their relationship and trying to seek advice as to whether or not their relationship will work out.

 

You want to date her, so remaining friends with her while she is in a relationship with someone else, means you have ulterior motives. So, try to respect their relationship and date other women for your own peace of mind.

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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And about the feeling so strong that I believe... I don't remember if I said this in the other topic but.. Her body language cues were those that someone does when they're attracted (nipples, eyes dilating, staring, playing with hair, sweating, etc) and she did flirt quite a bit... It may be wishful thinking but I seriously think that she may have/had some feelings for me but that she may not completely realize it

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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Feelings for her aside, I think you need to not concern yourself, with the details of their relationship and trying to seek advice as to whether or not their relationship will work out.

 

You want to date her, so remaining friends with her while she is in a relationship with someone else, means you have ulterior motives. So, try to respect their relationship and date other women for your own peace of mind.

I'm gonna try but I still wanna stay friends just so we're still a part of each other's lives.

 

Not only so I'll be there if something happens, but because we were friends at first and she's been a great friend

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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Well... I told my friend how I felt

 

He said that it did sound like I love her and that he'd just keep quiet about it unless I wanted him to. I told him to wait.

 

He said that he would have liked me being with her now

fun2bewith Established Member

fun2bewith

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Okay,

 

When you like someone so much that you don't pay attention to your own life, you lose yourself.

 

At this particular juncture, it's more important than ever to pay attention to your own pursuits, interests, etc.

 

You're clutching to the notion that she's going to come around and miraculousy decide you're what she really wants...So your current status in life is set to "waiting". Waiting is limbo, and it's no way to live your life. A friend zone is a really hard place to recover from.

 

 

True... I could read this all day long

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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True... I could read this all day long

So could I (and I have before) but... There are just too many weird things about their relationship

phillyfan Established Member

phillyfan

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1. They've been friends for about five years before getting together

2. She's rather religious. He isn't.

3. She thinks sex is nasty (never had it). He loves it.

4. He's the kind of guy that hangs around and flirts with alot of women. She broke up with her ex before because he ignored her

 

I just have a feeling...

 

...that she/he is a playa and has played him/her to the point where they has a major crush, comes on forums posting all about him/her...probably because getting in his/her pants by charming him/her would be a major conquest. Believe me if he/she manages it they'll disappear before you've gotten your panties back on. Just forget about it - it sounds like a disaster. You have been warned.

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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...that she/he is a playa and has played him/her to the point where they has a major crush, comes on forums posting all about him/her...probably because getting in his/her pants by charming him/her would be a major conquest. Believe me if he/she manages it they'll disappear before you've gotten your panties back on. Just forget about it - it sounds like a disaster. You have been warned.

Goddamn reword that post or something lol

shayan Established Member

shayan

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Kain you've been rambling on about this for a while. She is in a relationship, she likes someone else. Please let her go.

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Kain Highwind Established Member

Kain Highwind

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Kain you've been rambling on about this for a while. She is in a relationship, she likes someone else. Please let her go.

I would but there are just too many things here that I've sen break other people up and when even one of her best friends says that we should be together and that he thinks we will...

 

I just think I may haev one more chance

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