midianshrines Posted November 9, 2010 Posted November 9, 2010 My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2 years. Its been a rough long distance reletionship (Didnt know whether to post it here or in the LDR forum) We had our ups and downs but manage to work it out. But things started to get better, until i noticed that suddenly we didnt talk as much and she started to go out with her friends more often. I tried talking to her but she was constantly busy doing whatever. Then she told me she kissed another guy. She said how guilty she was and she was sobbing. Even more disturbing she said she didnt even know who the kid was. She tried telling me this happened awhile ago but then confessed it happened last friday. I do love her still and she says she loves me, i wanna be with her again but i dont wanna be fooled again. I dont know whether to look past this and forgive her or just break up with her. To be honest i dont have much dating skill, and i never been in a long term reletionship like this.
Nemicron Posted November 9, 2010 Posted November 9, 2010 You cant trust anyone long distant. They all cheat and everybody Lies. If I were you before you get further into this. I'd ditch her and find someone that closer. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2 years. Its been a rough long distance reletionship (Didnt know whether to post it here or in the LDR forum) We had our ups and downs but manage to work it out. But things started to get better, until i noticed that suddenly we didnt talk as much and she started to go out with her friends more often. I tried talking to her but she was constantly busy doing whatever. Then she told me she kissed another guy. She said how guilty she was and she was sobbing. Even more disturbing she said she didnt even know who the kid was. She tried telling me this happened awhile ago but then confessed it happened last friday. I do love her still and she says she loves me, i wanna be with her again but i dont wanna be fooled again. I dont know whether to look past this and forgive her or just break up with her. To be honest i dont have much dating skill, and i never been in a long term reletionship like this.
NickelbackFan Posted November 9, 2010 Posted November 9, 2010 Not everybody cheats and not everyone is a liar. Nemicron I read your story, and I feel for you brotha I do, but don't lump everyone into one category that is not fair. To the original poster. I would drop this girl like a hot potatoe. If you forgive her for kissing another guy after she betrayed you, who knows what the future has to hold. She lied to you. Don't sacrifice your dignity. Leave while you can before the disrespect gets worse.
fun2bewith Posted November 9, 2010 Posted November 9, 2010 (edited) I was in a similar situation as you 15 days ago(LDR 14 Months)...she did almost exactly as girl did, except...She is now with that guy... I broke up with and I am still sad though but it was the following step for me to do.. Positve points: 1) She told you. 2) When you break up she will miss you. 3) She will start to remember the good things you talked about or the things you did and she will then remember only the good.. 4) She could never erase you from her mind totaly, you are already a % of her life. 5) You want it to work, you got to close the gap of the distance...there should be no distance... "far from your goods close to your loss" Direct translation out of a language similar to Dutch...It means if you have something valuable you have to keep it close else you will lose it.. Negative points: 1) If you break up she might not crawl back to you and might wait for that call or msg for ages, months and you will stugle to function. 2) IMO If you don't close the distance gap, your relationship is unhealthy. 3) You need physical presence aswell as limited amounts of distance... 4) She kissed another guy...if she does not know the guy it is positve (then she could kiss a 100 guys, just for fun) but if she is hanging out with the guy all the time and then kissed him it is negative...and the relationship is over.... What is the good that can come from this: 1) Nothing is forever lost, it is only misplaced or in another form... Edited November 9, 2010 by fun2bewith forgot to add another point..
fun2bewith Posted November 9, 2010 Posted November 9, 2010 Don't sacrifice your dignity. Leave while you can before the disrespect gets worse. This is also very true...
Author midianshrines Posted November 9, 2010 Author Posted November 9, 2010 I read over everyones reply, and thank you. But now she told me her reason kissing the other guy. Really to me it sounds like a pathetic excuse, i understand how difficult not being there in person is but i managed to keep it under control. Anyway this is her reason: "Because he reminded me of you. He ended up ****ing me over in the end and it made me realize i was so desperate to see someone like me id do anything. And the fact that he was like you made me wonder.. Thats why im so ****ed up right now. Because when i think of you and our life i think how great we had it, when we were with each other but because i was so desperate for psychical love i got ****ed over in the end by both ends. Id knew itd happen too.. I had dreams about me being like this and i resulted in suicide in my own dream.. Because in the end i lost you. And although he was like you, he wasnt you. He wasnt the one there for 2 years through thick and thin. He wasnt you..". To me it does sound petty but i wanna be able to work this out, Just not be screwed over in the end. So yeah let know what you think.
You'reasian Posted November 9, 2010 Posted November 9, 2010 I read over everyones reply, and thank you. But now she told me her reason kissing the other guy. Really to me it sounds like a pathetic excuse, i understand how difficult not being there in person is but i managed to keep it under control. Anyway this is her reason: "Because he reminded me of you. He ended up ****ing me over in the end and it made me realize i was so desperate to see someone like me id do anything. And the fact that he was like you made me wonder.. Thats why im so ****ed up right now. Because when i think of you and our life i think how great we had it, when we were with each other but because i was so desperate for psychical love i got ****ed over in the end by both ends. Id knew itd happen too.. I had dreams about me being like this and i resulted in suicide in my own dream.. Because in the end i lost you. And although he was like you, he wasnt you. He wasnt the one there for 2 years through thick and thin. He wasnt you..". To me it does sound petty but i wanna be able to work this out, Just not be screwed over in the end. So yeah let know what you think. She's clever. Time to be single again.....next!
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