panda-panda Posted November 8, 2010 Posted November 8, 2010 (edited) My gf and I were in a relationship for about 3 and a half years, the last one of those years being long-distance. Unfortunately towards the beginning of the LDR she cheated on me, and when I asked her she always denied it, saying it was an insecurity of mine. Deep down I knew it happened because she has a history of cheating, but I denied it for a long time because I wanted to believe her because I loved her. I know she called it off between her and this guy, and she hasn't been with anyone since. I only recently found out that she'd been to counselling to sort her issues out. When I was about to leave to move to a new country to be with her, I began to put 2 and 2 together and the reality sunk in that she'd cheated and lied to me. I was still very hurt and unintentionally cheated on her. I told her I knew she cheated, and then I told her I had cheated. Now we're both very hurt, but I am glad the truth is out. We've broken up, and she will fly down to see and talk to me sometime (we'll be in different cities). Part of me thinks this is worth saving, because I do love her and we were in and LDR when this happened, and it wasn't easy to talk things through. Then I also wonder if I should just call it off completely because this might only bring up more hurt in the future. She's not really said anything about getting back together, although I have. I can see why she's not willing to make any promises just yet. I'd appreciate any sort of advice - I'm really at a loss now and completely confused Edited November 8, 2010 by panda-panda
PegNosePete Posted November 8, 2010 Posted November 8, 2010 unintentionally cheated on her How can you unintentionally cheat? That's not possible. Sounds like you should stay broken up with her, neither of you are ready for a monogamous relationship. Don't bother meeting up. Don't be friends. Just move on.
Author panda-panda Posted November 8, 2010 Author Posted November 8, 2010 (edited) How can you unintentionally cheat? That's not possible. Sounds like you should stay broken up with her, neither of you are ready for a monogamous relationship. Don't bother meeting up. Don't be friends. Just move on. Hi PegNosePete - "unintentional" was the wrong choice of words... what I was trying to say is that it was a terrible mistake. Perhaps you are right about this all, I don't know - but I do appreciate your view and will take it to heart. Edited November 8, 2010 by panda-panda
Author panda-panda Posted December 5, 2010 Author Posted December 5, 2010 Hi everyone - sorry to bump this one up again - I was wondering if anyone could offer any advice? Update: she's coming to visit me for Christmas and will be staying at my house. I really can't tell what to make of it. It might be for closure, it might be to give our relationship another try... What would you do in my situation?
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