She wants a second chance, but isn't admitting the another guy?

[Pianoguy]

A little background: she's been working in Europe for five months and will be there for probably at least another year, I can't yet afford to get over there because of circumstance.

 

I feel like she wants to have her cake and eat it too, but my dilemma is that I can't confront her on it. After our break-up, I did a bad thing a month later and guessed her Facebook password one night, did a little snooping, and read something about a romantic make-out session in the rain with a guy abroad. Alcohol, depression, and anger were a factor in my snooping. Of course I crossed a line that can't be undone, and I feel like scum for it, but hearing about it really helped me move on, officially do NC, and pick up the pieces. I honestly don't blame her for it, because it was after we broke-up and it's fair game. What I did was worse, I realize that.

 

Anyway, we've been talking again and she says she still loves me, still wants to get married someday, have a family, settle down, and be a good wife, but feels that she wants physical attention and sometimes doesn't care who she gets it from, but doesn't want to be a slut. The thing is, she said that there has been nobody after me, which I know from my snooping is an outright lie. It could have happened more than once for all I know, and because she didn't come clean about it, now there's doubts in my mind about how truthful she really is.

 

Does she deserve a second chance? How can I confront the issue? Do we have to live with these lies? Should I tell her about my snooping? We were always happy before the LDR and we both want to be in the same place and settle down, but I don't know how to rebuild that trust. I feel that I need to be honest, but I'll never cross that line again so I don't want to bring it up. What to do?

[Woggle]

She certainly does not deserve a second one.

[carhill]

I think she deserves a second chance with the guy she made out with. She was honest with him

 

TBH, I wouldn't LDR unless we were married and it was absolutely necessary for career or family. Not worth it, IMO, and I've had some in the past.

 

For a young person, fugetaboutit; too many temptations and not enough life experience to have healthy boundaries....

 

I'd move on. When she comes home, she can find you.

[wicar1]

dump her.....she's not worth it

[road]

Dump her

 

Tell her you caught her cheating

 

Who wants a girl that says she will get her needs met by who ever when ever the mood strikes her. Those statements are her laying the ground work for her to cheat on you. And she did because you did not challegne her on it.

 

How dumb is a guy that keeps dating a girl that says I'm going to cheat on you?

[seibert253]

She certainly does not deserve a second one.

 

 

^^^^^^^^

This