This is silly but

[moxie60]

:)I know I am reading more into this but was wondering what does it mean when a asks you to call him sometime? I finally met this guy I have been talking on an online dating site, yesterday. We met at a coffee shop. We seemed to hit it off well. I had to leave for an interview, he walked me to my car, and said , " we should hang out again, and text me, tell me how your interview went, and you should call me sometime" I texted him after the job interview to tell him I got the job, then he said, "heck yeah pretty lady!" I later got another text from that said, " Are we going to see more of you in these parts?' I said ofcourse. Then he said, Awesome! you keep me posted!" I am thinking he is interested but why did he ask me to call him. I want him to call me. so now what?

 

 

I know I am being silly but just tell me what I think, I like this guy and I want to get to know him better.

[Nemicron]

I'd say if you like him. Dont be silly with the formalities of being shy. No days there isn't such a thing hardly. Call him. And the line " call me sometime" is code to see if you are really interested. ITs kinda a stupid game but everyone plays it. Give it a try. And grats on your new job

 

 

 

:)I know I am reading more into this but was wondering what does it mean when a asks you to call him sometime? I finally met this guy I have been talking on an online dating site, yesterday. We met at a coffee shop. We seemed to hit it off well. I had to leave for an interview, he walked me to my car, and said , " we should hang out again, and text me, tell me how your interview went, and you should call me sometime" I texted him after the job interview to tell him I got the job, then he said, "heck yeah pretty lady!" I later got another text from that said, " Are we going to see more of you in these parts?' I said ofcourse. Then he said, Awesome! you keep me posted!" I am thinking he is interested but why did he ask me to call him. I want him to call me. so now what?

 

 

I know I am being silly but just tell me what I think, I like this guy and I want to get to know him better.

[lenny]

IMO it means he would like you to call him sometime. Telling you he's interested and the ball is in your court.

[D-Lish]

Hey Moxie. He doesn't seem like he's shy, so I don't know why he'd leave the ball in YOUR court to call HIM. If he's capable of being open, calling you pretty lady, and asking you if he's going to see you again, he's surely capable of asking YOU out for another date!

 

I'd leave it with a "for sure, I'd like to go out again". That lets him know you are interested in going out again and pushes the ball back in his court where it should be.

 

If this guy wants to go out again and he's expressing the interest that he wants to see you again- he'll ask (as he should).

[Nemicron]

Just ask him out. instead of playing any sort of stupid game. In the long run he will respect you more then worrying about where the ball is in what court. thats just stupid. If you like him then go get him. If not. Dont waste your time contemplating about it.

[D-Lish]

Just ask him out. instead of playing any sort of stupid game. In the long run he will respect you more then worrying about where the ball is in what court. thats just stupid. If you like him then go get him. If not. Dont waste your time contemplating about it.

 

Men don't respect women that do the chasing, nor should they.

Respecting yourself is not playing a game.

 

He's not going to respect it in the long run, because men like a bit of a challenge.

 

He's shown interest, even come on a little strong, then he's thrown the ball in her court to ask him out- he's enticing her to chase him to see if she will. If she does, he will lose interest.

[BobSacamento]

Sounds like he wants to put the least amount of effort into dating as possible. Are you also going to have to think of something to do or is he going to say "wanna come over and watch a movie?"

[quankanne]

sounds to me like he's definitely interested, but doesn't want to be too pushy by calling immediately.

[Nemicron]

Which is playing a game. is it not? instead of being out right. And I personally do respect a women for not playing games and being direct. Either way is it not lame instead of just being honest? Wouldnt you rather a guy be direct with you. Rather then guess what your feeling or pull out his magic decoder ring? Seriously. If you like someone then tell them. if not. Then walk away. Thats prett simple and cut and dry. Romance doesn't have to be a shade of grey. It should be simple.

 

Men don't respect women that do the chasing, nor should they.

Respecting yourself is not playing a game.

 

He's not going to respect it in the long run, because men like a bit of a challenge.

 

He's shown interest, even come on a little strong, then he's thrown the ball in her court to ask him out- he's enticing her to chase him to see if she will. If she does, he will lose interest.

[moxie60]

so should I wait to see if he calls me or should I call him? And how long should I wait?

[Nemicron]

If you wait it could be to late. But keep your defenses up and be careful. Just call him. Atleast I think so and see what happens. This isn't the 50's or 60's where a girl has to wait patiently by the phone for a guy to call. Just try it. Either it works out and you find yourself someone nice. Which to me sounds like you deserve that. or You move on and find someone better. I'm a guy. But I seriously dont understand these kind of things. I've always been really straight forward with what I wanted or not. There are plenty more fish in the sea to waste my time with one thing. Trust me. Give it a try your not losing anything

 

 

so should I wait to see if he calls me or should I call him? And how long should I wait?

[moxie60]

Okay I will do it! I will call him tomorrow! I am a big girl, and your right its a stupid game we play. Thats why I hate dating! I will just go for it. Thanks for all your advice.

[Nemicron]

I'm so glad I could help atleast one person understand. That made my night. Thank you miss Moxie

 

 

Okay I will do it! I will call him tomorrow! I am a big girl, and your right its a stupid game we play. Thats why I hate dating! I will just go for it. Thanks for all your advice.

[D-Lish]

Which is playing a game. is it not? instead of being out right. And I personally do respect a women for not playing games and being direct. Either way is it not lame instead of just being honest? Wouldnt you rather a guy be direct with you. Rather then guess what your feeling or pull out his magic decoder ring? Seriously. If you like someone then tell them. if not. Then walk away. Thats prett simple and cut and dry. Romance doesn't have to be a shade of grey. It should be simple.

 

Nothing I suggested is game behaviour, it's simply about OP respecting herself. If anything, I see a little gaming behaviour in HIS approach. He acts interested, flatters her, then says "call me!"

 

Nem, if you met a girl and you really liked her, and she showed interest back- would you really leave it up to "call me!?" No, you'd ask her out again! She's shown interest in response to him after the date.

 

There is no magic decoder ring- she's shown interest! But he's left it for her to do the work to get to see him again.

 

There is nothing simple at all about dating. To believe there is no psychology to dating is naive.

[Nemicron]

ph I totally agree. he is playing a game. NEver said she wasn't She just seemed confused about it.

 

And I do really see your point. But I think it depends on how it was all playied. I just dont see the point in playing any games if I liked the girl and I had her number I'd either text her and say I like her or I wouldn't. But maybe I'm different. I think its sexy when a girl shows some of her own stuff. And I respect it more then having to jump through any hoops. But I do agree with you. In this case the guy is playing the game totally.

 

 

 

Nothing I suggested is game behaviour, it's simply about OP respecting herself. If anything, I see a little gaming behaviour in HIS approach. He acts interested, flatters her, then says "call me!"

 

Nem, if you met a girl and you really liked her, and she showed interest back- would you really leave it up to "call me!?" No, you'd ask her out again! She's shown interest in response to him after the date.

 

There is no magic decoder ring- she's shown interest! But he's left it for her to do the work to get to see him again.

 

There is nothing simple at all about dating. To believe there is no psychology to dating is naive.

[moxie60]

So to call or not to call is the question. Say if I don't call, and let him make the move, then I know he is interested, but If I call, I could end up making fool of myself and the guy loses interest or he is happy I called. I don't I mentioned this but he live an hour away from me. I always travel to the city he lives in because it so much nicer than where I live. That could also be why he left the ball in my court because I live an hour away from him. So when I travel that way next time then I could stop by and hang out for a while.

[today]

Do you want to call him? If no, then don't. What I would do is the next time you're in the coffee shop and he's not there, send him a text and just be playful to open communication and then work it in that you want him to call you. Don't know precisely how you can do this since it depends on your own style of communication and the rapport you have with him.

 

Though, I'm wary of the line "you should call me sometime." He wants you to put in the effort obviously, which hints to me that either he's lazy about it, not too crazy about you, or so confident in himself and his appeal that you will essentially go after him. That's just my take on it.

 

This is your call to make. If you don't want to call, then don't. If you don't mind, then do it.

[seekandfind]

Please don't call. Hopefully it's not too late to do what D-Lish, let him know you are interested, and put the ball back in his court.

 

9 times out of 10, if the girl does the chasing, the guy's interest or level of respect for the girl will go down at least a little.

 

If he had a fun time with you, and is interested, then he will contact you.

[Jynxx]

Nem, if you met a girl and you really liked her, and she showed interest back- would you really leave it up to "call me!?" No, you'd ask her out again! She's shown interest in response to him after the date.

 

There is no magic decoder ring- she's shown interest! But he's left it for her to do the work to get to see him again.

 

There is nothing simple at all about dating. To believe there is no psychology to dating is naive.

 

The reason he would ask her to call him is because he isn't sure if she is interested in him. As a man I can say it can be hard to see what for most women would be obvious signals, so if she has shown she's interested that doesn't mean he got the message. So she should call him and tell him in the future she would expect him to call her.

 

I have yet to meet a guy who I think would be manipulative enough to use this technique to gain the upper hand in a relationship (I assume that's what you mean with psychology?). We are very simple creatures on this sort of stuff, and I'm sure his though process was "Does she like me? If I ask her to call me and she likes me she will call me, if she doesn't like me then I won't waste her time or be a stalker" rather than "If I let her do all the effort in the early stations of a relationship then she will subconciously feel like she's less than me and has to work for me and I can abuse that further in the relationship".

[Nemicron]

Just call him. Like I said what are you losing if he flakes out you'll know without having to play all the games and can move on and find someone better

 

 

So to call or not to call is the question. Say if I don't call, and let him make the move, then I know he is interested, but If I call, I could end up making fool of myself and the guy loses interest or he is happy I called. I don't I mentioned this but he live an hour away from me. I always travel to the city he lives in because it so much nicer than where I live. That could also be why he left the ball in my court because I live an hour away from him. So when I travel that way next time then I could stop by and hang out for a while.

[Nemicron]

That isn't always true. And you know it. lol

 

 

Please don't call. Hopefully it's not too late to do what D-Lish, let him know you are interested, and put the ball back in his court.

 

9 times out of 10, if the girl does the chasing, the guy's interest or level of respect for the girl will go down at least a little.

 

If he had a fun time with you, and is interested, then he will contact you.

[Cee]

I think it's fine to call. And you get more information about his level of interest in one telephone call (or an unreturned call) than from 100 text messages.