SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 My cousin thinks I am being irrational , my bestfriend says I'm right. I need LS's opinion. Here is the situation. Was seeing this guy. He was going away for a week . So I text him saying "Well I wonder who is going to entertain me while you are away." Now , if you recieved this message what will it mean to you?How will you take it ? What would you think I meant by it? I will post his response later
Feelin Frisky Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 It would mean to me that I better go give you something to remember me by but good.
Author SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Author Posted November 5, 2010 That is what I would think ,lol kidding. But I sent that message to him , and he replied saying.A variation of : "Well you can go **** someone else, you know". I don't know my cousin is saying that I have to understand that he may not know me as well and not get my sarcasm. Which I can understand , but really I don't see how I was being sarcastic. I asked my bestfriend the same question. And she said if she got that message from someone , she would take it as the person is going to miss her. Which is what I was trying to imply. Anyway I stopped talking to him but he kept contacting me. So I asked him why he replied like this and he said me ask him that question was like "It is as if I know you have your period and I am asking you what should I do, I am horny." I really don't think I am bat **** crazy for not talking to him anymore. I actually feel really disrespected by his reply. Since that is obviously all he throught of me. Sigh my cousin says I have no patience , and should give him a next try but if he can't get my "sarcasm", lol, what is the point?
ReturnToSender Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 I wouldnt have sent a teasing message like that just cause Id take pause as to how the other person might take it, esp we didnt know each other too well... But then again I have a pretty whacky sense of humour, its one of the first things people who meet me pick up on and even though I woudlnt do it, it prolly would have been taken as, and replied to jokingly. Which is kinda what I think this guy did too. I mean, like now youve taken his reply seriously and offended, but what if he took your message seriously, as in that you are implying youll entertian yourself with someone else. You clearly didnt mean that question to be taken seriously, and I think its just as fair to say he clearly didnt mean for you to take his answer seriously either. See what I mean?
Cee Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 I would have called him as soon as I got his text. Texting is prone to misunderstandings. I don't think it's fair of you to break up with him based on his text response. Why not have a phone conversation and hash it out?
Author SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Author Posted November 5, 2010 I wouldnt have sent a teasing message like that just cause Id take pause as to how the other person might take it, esp we didnt know each other too well... But then again I have a pretty whacky sense of humour, its one of the first things people who meet me pick up on and even though I woudlnt do it, it prolly would have been taken as, and replied to jokingly. Which is kinda what I think this guy did too. I mean, like now youve taken his reply seriously and offended, but what if he took your message seriously, as in that you are implying youll entertian yourself with someone else. You clearly didnt mean that question to be taken seriously, and I think its just as fair to say he clearly didnt mean for you to take his answer seriously either. See what I mean? Well I talked to him recently he said he meant his answer, but only because he throught that is what I meant. I really don't see how some one could have not taken the question as a joke. Even when I asked him if he was serious , he said yes. Sigh I hate text messages.
lenny Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 Did you consider the idea that you didn't get his sarcasm? It could be he took you're message as teasing and tried teasing you right back. I'd definitely clear the air here rather than avoid talking to the guy.
Author SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Author Posted November 5, 2010 I would have called him as soon as I got his text. Texting is prone to misunderstandings. I don't think it's fair of you to break up with him based on his text response. Why not have a phone conversation and hash it out? Yeah I should have called him. I think I was just beyond mad at that point. Sadly enough the damage is done. This happened about three weeks ago. I contacted him earlier this week, after no contact. He said he missed me , and apoligized for misunderstanding but hasn't contacted me since . I don't blame him one bit.
Author SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Author Posted November 5, 2010 Did you consider the idea that you didn't get his sarcasm? It could be he took you're message as teasing and tried teasing you right back. I'd definitely clear the air here rather than avoid talking to the guy. Now I really feel like I over reacted. I really didn't see myself as being sarcastic. So I didn't think he was being sarcastic. I really didn't think I was being sarcastic , until my cousin mentioned it today. I was just being me.
ReturnToSender Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 Well I talked to him recently he said he meant his answer, but only because he throught that is what I meant. I really don't see how some one could have not taken the question as a joke. Even when I asked him if he was serious , he said yes. Sigh I hate text messages. Well that sucks.. Yeah, just let him know you werent serious and hope he takes it in stride as a misunderstanding... And def in the future dont coyly allude to stuff like that, esp not in a text message!
lululucy Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 I disagree with these guys.. I'd say it is a warning sign personally. It's pretty obvious you're teasing him, and even if he was genuinely hurt that's a pretty rude response for someone not actually in a relationship with you. Nevermind his later text.. I think you were lucky to get away from this guy when you did, he seems like a loose canon.
Author SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Author Posted November 5, 2010 I disagree with these guys.. I'd say it is a warning sign personally. It's pretty obvious you're teasing him, and even if he was genuinely hurt that's a pretty rude response for someone not actually in a relationship with you. Nevermind his later text.. I think you were lucky to get away from this guy when you did, he seems like a loose canon. This what I had in my mind when I stopped contact . That some how this message transitioned to jealousy and I should take this as a sign. But I have been having no luck with guys recently that my head is just wandering .
Author SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Author Posted November 5, 2010 Well that sucks.. Yeah, just let him know you werent serious and hope he takes it in stride as a misunderstanding... And def in the future dont coyly allude to stuff like that, esp not in a text message! Well I know next time to deal with things , off of text messages. But I have no intention of back tracking. I don't think nothing will come of me and him after this. So I just have to learn from my mistakes
lululucy Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 This what I had in my mind when I stopped contact . That some how this message transitioned to jealousy and I should take this as a sign. But I have been having no luck with guys recently that my head is just wandering . I think you're absolutely right. I mean, if he's already playing jealousy mind-games on you? It's pretty damn controlling on his part. Don't let yourself settle for weird stuff like that just because you're in a dryspell, you're worth more than that
Author SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Author Posted November 5, 2010 I'm having trouble understanding if you want him to be more than friends, or if you already are something more. In any case I think it was really nice to tell him that. If he got signs from you while you met than he will get the message. If you didn’t than he will think that you are nice to think of him as a good friend. We were dating , we were way more than friends. We were sleeping together, that is probably why I felt even worse by his response. I am not to keen to being in a relationship, so I never really had many instances where I would actually be sweet to a guy.Since I had some bad experiances. So , I felt like complete **** by his response. I am kind of sick of trying ,since I thought the message would have came across as sweet . Not be shot down.
Author SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Author Posted November 5, 2010 He sounds very insecure, and childish. I agree , but he is 8 years my senior and was always mentioning , how I couldn't want anything serious becaue of my age. Sigh I am sick of thinking of this guy.
shayan Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 way overthought you guys analyse things deeply. He intrepreted it as, ( she wants to make me jealous, or show that she isn't desperate) so he said well you can go f someone. Wow what a miserable way to respond to a text message. He seems insecure.
shayan Posted November 5, 2010 Posted November 5, 2010 (edited) and seriously you got to learn not to take things so seriously, otherwise you will be hurt alot. But I understand because you guys have been dating for a while. You know sometimes people just say stupid things. Edited November 5, 2010 by shayan
Author SilentVoice Posted November 5, 2010 Author Posted November 5, 2010 and seriously you got to learn not to take things so seriously, otherwise you will be hurt alot. But I understand because you guys have been dating for a while. You know sometimes people just say stupid things. I really just want to give him a stupid kick. I really was wishing this one would have worked out. Anyway thanks for the replies everyone
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