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The update, for anyone who remembers me...


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Posted

1. Back in NYC after eight months traveling Mexico and the Southern U.S. Spent several of those months with my family, and it was for the most part really lovely and healing.

 

2. No sex, no dates, no relationships. Been 3.5 years now. I'm okay with it...those things don't really even seem like part of my life anymore. It's been incredibly freeing to learn that I don't need them. It is exhilarating to know I can survive on my own.

 

3. I finally, just yesterday, looked at Joe's facebook. First time I'd seen pics of him in 3.5 years. I am still in love, for sure. But I didn't cry, and my heart didn't leap into my throat. It would appear he is still single, and he no longer lives in NYC. He quit his band and moved to rural Virginia and started a recording studio in a barn. His status updates are 100% about old-time music.

 

4. I listened to old-time music! I went to youtube, and for the first time since he left me, I listened to fiddle tunes for like 15 full minutes (not his.) They made me happy. I remembered why I liked the music before I ever met him. I am no longer afraid of fiddle tunes.

 

5. My book just won a major award. It is getting stellar reviews. I am corresponding with my favorite author. My favorite magazine wrote me yesterday to say THANK YOU for writing it and to tell me it was an important book. I am overwhelmed, I am grateful, I am living my wildest dream. I still hear Joe's voice in my head a million times a day saying, "It doesn't matter, it's not music," but the rational part of me realizes I love books more than I love Joe.

 

6. I am starting to leave the house and talk to people, slowly but surely, once or twice a week. I've lost 30 pounds. I moved to a great apartment in a new neighborhood that has no association with Joe. I have a duplex and turned the downstairs floor into a dance studio. I love it.

 

7. I sent in a grant proposal today for travel related to the next book.

 

8. I think I am going to live.

Posted

Woo hoo! you're amazing!

Posted

Happy to read the update Sedgwick. Congrats on the book. Life gives us gifts. Acceptance is one of them. Best wishes! :)

Posted

oh, sedge-honey, you're going to do more than live, you're gonna FLY. And we'll be behind you the whole way! :love: :love: :love:

Posted

I read a lot of your posts, and just WOW!

 

x

Posted

I have missed you most of all scarecrow (ok sedge) - this post brought tears to my eyes I am so happy for you! Welcome back, congrats on your amazing success!!! So well deserved!

Posted

I definitely remember you! I followed a tonne of your posts. Congrats on the new phase!

Posted

And why not?

 

:)

 

x

Posted

I remember you Sedgwick! I was always hoping the best for you. I knew things would go so well with your book. Congratulations. You truly deserve it! And I'm so jealous of your trip to Mexico. :)

Posted (edited)

whoop whoop!

 

 

not that it matters but he prolly still looks you up online and is jealous

Edited by McGrupp
Posted

Congrats, nice that you could travel for 8 months! A great person will come your way, you have alot to offer! :)

  • Author
Posted

McGrupp, I'm not a fiddle tune, I doubt he looks me up online at all! But I'm okay with that.

 

Got another good review from a major mag today. Woo! :)

 

Thanks for the words of encouragement, everybody. I'm doing a lot better, for sure. I'm furnishing my grown-up apartment...I bought a dishwasher today! It's the little things!!

Posted
McGrupp, I'm not a fiddle tune, I doubt he looks me up online at all! But I'm okay with that.

 

Got another good review from a major mag today. Woo! :)

 

Thanks for the words of encouragement, everybody. I'm doing a lot better, for sure. I'm furnishing my grown-up apartment...I bought a dishwasher today! It's the little things!!

 

So pleased for you:D you are doing great.. cyber hug to you x

Posted

I <3 you Sedgwick and have thought of you often. I am thrilled to hear how well your life has turned!! :)

Posted

So happy for you and that you've found a small glimpse of happiness in this place we call reality. :love:

 

I hope it lasts for an extended period of time

Posted

Ahhhh, so great to hear from you and with such happy news and a MUCH improved attitude !

 

I think everyone should have to sign something when they join, PROMISING they will come back and update us !

 

If you PM me the title of your book, I promise I will buy it ! :D

Posted

Congratulations!

 

I think of you a lot. I can relate to your posts more than you know. No one said the process was easy but you seem to have an awful lot going for you outside of your love life and that is worth more than you know.

 

Slow and steady wins the race - keep going, keep living. Lots of love!

  • Author
Posted (edited)

Thanks everybody! Interestingly, one of his friends just sent me a fb message saying he'd (he, the friend, not he, Joe) seen the buzz about the book and thought of me. I am shocked and flattered that his friends even remember me, as I always felt they were just way, way, WAYY too cool for me. It makes me think that maybe Joe might still remember me too, which is kind of a nice thought. I have spent all these years assuming he just forgot it all the minute he flitted out the door.

 

I just sent a proposal for my next book to my editor. It is about how the breakup of this relationship led me to travel. I figure there needs to be a ballsy version of Eat, Pray, Love for the chicks with brains and without trust funds. (Or, as my agent says, "A book for anyone who's not yet wearing the Eat, Pray, Love perfume and burning the EPL incense and sweating all over her EPL yoga mat.") This one will be dedicated to Joe. I don't expect to ever hear from him again, but I can write him one final, grand love letter that he will never read. I sort of feel it's something I have to do for every other woman who's ever been in my situation. It's like my big literary way of saying goodbye to someone who doesn't give a sh*t if I ever say it or not, I suppose.

Edited by sedgwick
Posted

The best revenge is success!

You have picked up your life, channeled the negative energy and created something you can use! You are now inspiring so many people. It’s awesome to read your progress. Keep it up!

Posted

Sedgwick- :bunny:. F**K fiddle music lady! Well done, I am so happy for you. I remember you and the pain you went through was :(.

 

If you PM me the title of your book, I promise I will buy it ! :D

 

Me too.

 

Thanks everybody! Interestingly, one of his friends just sent me a fb message saying he'd (he, the friend, not he, Joe) seen the buzz about the book and thought of me. I am shocked and flattered that his friends even remember me, as I always felt they were just way, way, WAYY too cool for me. .

 

Way too cool for a published and successful author? Come on lady!

 

I just sent a proposal for my next book to my editor. It is about how the breakup of this relationship led me to travel. I figure there needs to be a ballsy version of Eat, Pray, Love for the chicks with brains and without trust funds. (Or, as my agent says, "A book for anyone who's not yet wearing the Eat, Pray, Love perfume and burning the EPL incense and sweating all over her EPL yoga mat.") T

 

I love this, esp the bolded part. I thought I was alone in not loving EPL, but it turns out I am not. I am looking forward to your version already.

Posted
This one will be dedicated to Joe. I don't expect to ever hear from him again, but I can write him one final, grand love letter that he will never read. I sort of feel it's something I have to do for every other woman who's ever been in my situation. It's like my big literary way of saying goodbye to someone who doesn't give a sh*t if I ever say it or not, I suppose.

 

If I act like an idiot and treat you poorly, well you dedicate a book to me too:rolleyes:

Posted

Sedge - I haven't been on here for a bit, and decided to see what was up here, when I saw this post. So happy for you. Glad you're doing well. Keep up the good work!

Posted

Hi Sedge, what a wonderful update! Congratulations on all the wonderful things happening for you, and congrats especially on the strength and optimism I can see in your words. :)

Posted

YIPPIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:bunny::bunny::bunny:

 

This is great! TO THE TOP SEDGWICK! Congrats love and best of wishes on the next book! :D

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