drewsmom Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 Has anyone had to go for a court ordered deposition? And how bad are they? my stbxh has ben dragging this divorce out for almost a year, not wanting to show all his finances. saying he cant pay alimoney or child support, dragging it out to see if i got sick of it and would give in to his request to just settle it without lawyers. if i did that i would not have seen all the finances he has hidden. so the judge got pissed said it was him who petitioned this divorce and he is the one dragging it out so he ordered a deposition. hell the judge wanted a trial that day he was so pissed. see stbxh and father underestimated me and thought i would just go with his lawyer in the beginning instead i got my own. there the type of family who thinks there like movie stars and they have money so they can get away with anything. My stbx is so nervous, and his dad is more nervous, my lawyer told me his dad ran to his lawyer the day after he found out there is a deposition, and he started throwing offers on the table hoping the deposition would be stopped. but my lawyer i think is more curious of what they have to hide than i am because she told me the deposition will go foward. think its a challenge for her. see the dad is nervous cause his name is on the businesses also and i am sure he was the third party helping stbx hid money, and mabey cause there all ruthless there is illigal things in the paperwork that daddy dont want to come out. he dont want his businesses coming into this case. I was talking to stbx's brother and he said stbx is so nervous about the dep, I told him it didnt have to come to this if his brother didnt drag things out. so my question is, how screwed will he get when things come out?
KikiW Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 Not sure how "screwed" he will get, think if it more like "how much more fair" it will be for YOU. Unless courts are different state-to-state, the court's job is to decide what is fair. It is highly unlikely that a court will say "ooh you crafty jerk, i see you tried to hide this $30K retirement fund your wife is entitled to half of... well I am going to give ALL of it to her. NYA!" It is more likely that the judge will say something like "well, you've certainly done your best to hide your assets, so I am going to require a third party investigation to make sure I see EVERYTHING and your wife gets everything she is entitled to. And by the way, YOU will be paying for the costs of that as well as your wifes attorney's fees". Sorry you're having such a rough time, hopefully things move along so you can get past it all and focus on your future.
Author drewsmom Posted November 4, 2010 Author Posted November 4, 2010 Thank you. I am just looking forward to this being over. Its been long enough. Were still in the process of selling our house and with the market the way it is it looks like its not going to happen anytime soon. So I am stuck right now. luckily due to stbx not wanting his credit screwed up he is still taking care of the bills. I dont work so I dont have money. that was his choice for me to be a stay at home mom. I am curious about his father getting so nervous about the deposition. my lawyer seems to think he is behind alot of it and i am sure he is.
KikiW Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 It IS curious. FIL might be concerned that you will legally have a stake in the company (whether that's true or not I don't know), which I can understand might be a legitimate concern. Hopefully STBX will stop messing around and be fair. It only pads attorneys' pockets when things are drawn out.
2sure Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 You can bet alimony and child support are no longer a concern to him now that his income may come to the attention of the IRS, the state, etc. Bullies become cry babies the moment you dont back down
The-Zen-Warrior Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 It IS curious. FIL might be concerned that you will legally have a stake in the company (whether that's true or not I don't know), which I can understand might be a legitimate concern. This is a very valid point here, At least for me, when my Mother & Father back in 1986 divorced, my Father did his best to push a little hush money here, bury a little goose egg there, he did his best to try and hide a little money. Come to find out that the slight hiding of money is not what the divorce court judge was interested in, he wanted the business paperwork, the journals and so forth. My Fathers side of the family was walking on egg shells and was acting like they were having puppies, for they knew, that with enough digging my Mothers name would be on a lot of company paperwork as either a share holder, owner, manager and so forth. My Mother knew this and kept of fighting through her attorney! My Fathers side of the family kept throwing offers of "big money" and "medical coverage" plans for life and so forth, they were trying to buy her out, without really knowing what her net worth in the company was. But still they fought to the bitter end. Then it all came out in court, Fathers family had no more opportunities to throw out anymore "big money" buy out offers, no more games! I remember, I was 16 years old, and I to was on paper a "co-owner" for the company, just due to the fact that I was family and the bosses Son. But with Mother, she hit pay dirt! The judge read off the approx. value of all liquid and solid assets to the company, with a final new worth, 2."something" Million Dollars!!!! The court investigator testified that on many different papers my Mother was 50% owner, so the evidence weighted out and Mom came out smelling like roses! I would recommend that to you drewsmom, that if your situation end like my Mom's and you walk away smelling like dew dripping roses, do something productive with the money. My Mother took her money and reinvested in back into herself. She used it to pay here way through college and became a medical doctor a M.D., went co-partner with several other doctors and opened up their own private practice. I wish you the best of luck, and keep on fighting, keep pressing forward and what ever you do, don't take any offers thrown in your direction. I have a funny feeling the offers being thrown out will be nothing in compared to what a judge will get for you!
GorillaTheater Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 Depositions are really, really fun. Except when it's your client. Then the best you can hope for is that the damage is minimal.
fltc Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 Has anyone had to go for a court ordered deposition? And how bad are they? They're not bad, I've been through several. Both parties and attorneys and a court reporter will be present (you probably won't be therel unless your attorney feels you'll be needed to provide additional information.), your attorney will go through the usual name, address, etc. stuff and then ask questions related to his finances, income, etc. He'll be under oath and the judge will *usually* be available by phone if needed to compel an answer to a question. There's no reason he can't lie or evade questions, it's your job to review the transcript and tell your attorney if he did.
Author drewsmom Posted November 4, 2010 Author Posted November 4, 2010 Thanks you for all your responses. And no I wont be there, my lawyer said FIL has companies branching off of other companies that dont make sense, And fil is very nervous. Oh he must hate me so much. hey it was his son who had the affair. but its his money thats at stake. I am sure stbx heard an ear full from him, also when we were getting married his dad had a pre nup for me to sign, when i took it to my lawyer he advised me not to sign it or marry him, he said someone in this family had a very bitter divorce, yes fil and mil. I didnt sign it, when i got home i talked to husband to be and told him i wont marry him unless he changed it. he actually agreed, but i highly doubt daddy knew he did until he wanted to divorce. his father is a big influince on stbx, prob because of his money. but like i said he brought this on and i wasnt about to back down, no matter how hard they tried to get me to settle without lawyers. I have a son to take care of they forget about him. but money is thicker than blood!! I wont give up, screw them. they all thought i would lay down and die when he left, it was just the opposite, I was fine within 2 weeks. sure it hurt, but i had my son and myself to take care of.
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