northern_sky Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 He sent me a message tonight (our date is tomorrow, but we hadn't set a specific time tomorrow night) Hey, So, quick update: there's an "------ meeting" tomorrow after work (a bunch of -------- from around the area get together to talk about what they're up to) which will keep me a little later than usual, but I should still be free by 7:30. I also just learned that my friend ----- is having a birthday party at her friend's record store on ------ tomorrow night. Would you be interested in stopping by that party for a few minutes? I'm probably only going to know a few people there so we don't need to stay long, but I want to at least wish Lisette a happy birthday. XXX I realllllly don't want to go. I sent him this message back: What time is the party or were you thinking of stopping by? He responded: I think the party kind of goes all evening -- at least from 6pm onward -- so we can go whenever we want (you're certainly invited but if you don't want to come I can just stop by for a half hour before we meet up). XXX Would it look bad if I made some excuse for meeting later and agreed to let him go alone for a bit before we meet up? I could say I'm finishing a movie I rented with my roomie, which is something I do need to do. The real reason I don't want to go is because I hate socializing with NEW people around him. The last time I tried to -- when we went to that fair -- it was a disaster. I'm already bad at socializing, but having him watch me seems like a nightmare. Then again, does it look even worse to not go? He'll probably figure it's because I'm shy. I did pass up going to that party at his house a few weeks ago, even though I initially said I would probably make it. I gave some excuse about having a project to finish. So which is worse: looking painfully, and I mean painfully, awkward in the presence of other people around him, or not going and looking potentially avoidant of social situations? Bare in mind I've been feeling pretty down the last couple of days, so my confidence is even shakier than usual at the moment. I don't know if I can handle a party right now.
Alexanda Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 I think its okay if you dont go, but you cant avoid social situations all the time.
Cracker Jack Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 Do you need to? No, not really. I think it would be nice if you went, tho.
Els Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 If it were me, I'd honestly tell him in a very nice way that I would feel a tad awkward (after all, you don't even know anyone there), so I'd meet him after the party. If he understands, bonus points for him. If he doesn't and takes it personally, I'd wager he isn't that compatible.
yah Posted November 4, 2010 Posted November 4, 2010 I'm really shy too around new people but I would go. It gets easier once you've seen the same people a few times.
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