Women Do Not Have It Easier In Dating!

[sanskrit]

When women actually do at least 30-40% of the approaching for dates, then this question or conclusion may have merit. Until then it's just laughable. Sorry, and not trying to start a flame war, but an average man must make approaches to have an inkling chance of ending up with someone compatible and an average woman does not have to make approaches to have even a greater chance than the average man of ending up happily involved or even just dating.

 

And since internet dating is such a big part of dating these days, part two is that when women are even 30-40% of those on online dating sites, then we will know that dating is just as difficult for women as men.

 

Until those things happen, the percentage of approaches by women increasing and internet dating imbalance decreasing, these well documented facts correlate very clearly with the conclusion that men have it tougher in the U.S. And to preempt, -I- have no problems getting dates, sex, or relationships whenever I want, but my -personal- experience is completely irrelevant. Also, I have no "bitterness" at all that women have it easier in dating, it's just a given reality and fact, so spare all that sort of ranting in replying to this.

 

One other relevant statistic, when the % of married men in a society is approximately equivalent to the % of married women, then there is assumed parity in "ease of dating," admittedly assuming some people don't want marriage. If one gender finds marriage more than the other, even given that some will say more women -want- to get married, the dating game is in fact "easier" for that gender. Not going to google up which gender is "more married" in the U.S., so if you think I'm wrong, google up some stats saying men are equivalently married as women, and I'll gladly eat crow.

 

Oh and don't bother with some "rationalized" weasel definition of what "easier" means. If you think the above stats are inapplicable, suggest your own different stats that show the other way, subjective "I have a real hard time" stuff is non-discussion.

Edited November 3, 2010 by sanskrit

[Untouchable_Fire]

When women actually do at least 30-40% of the approaching for dates, then this question or conclusion may have merit. Until then it's just laughable. Sorry, and not trying to start a flame war, but an average man must make approaches to have an inkling chance of ending up with someone compatible and an average woman does not have to make approaches to have even a greater chance than the average man of ending up happily involved or even just dating.

 

One other relevant statistic, when the % of married men in a society is approximately equivalent to the % of married women, then there is assumed parity in "ease of dating," admittedly assuming some people don't want marriage. If one gender finds marriage more than the other, even given that some will say more women -want- to get married, the dating game is in fact "easier" for that gender. Not going to google up which gender is "more married" in the U.S., so if you think I'm wrong, google up some stats saying men are equivalently married as women, and I'll gladly eat crow.

 

First... Excluding gay marriage.... and assuming women can't marry themselves or their cats... How the crap can one gender be more married than the other? If there are 10 married couples in a town... that means 10 men are married to 10 women... that's equal. If your perhaps thinking of the percentage of single people per gender... I think women outnumber men. I'm just guessing.

 

Numerically it works like this. If a guy is an attractive level 5 for whatever reason he can try all the women who are 10's, the 9's, the 8's the 7's... all the way down until he gets the best available to him.

 

A woman who is a 5 sits all alone and gets ignored because she is the last one the guy is going to try.

 

I mean seriously... the stuff you keep saying might be true for something like the top 10% of the female population, they get tons of attention and yes they can be more selective in dating. Even then they can't tell Mr. Right from Mr. Douche at first approach.

[Sanman]

I get what UF was trying to say. Honestly though, who cares? Even if women do have it easier, are all the guys here going to chop off their genitals off and get a weave? Everyone needs to deal with their own issues. I really don't understand this need point fingers about who has it easier as it doesn't do anything. The bottom line is that those who embrace their role the best will succeed in dating. Are there different characteristics that men need and women need in dating? Absolutely, but that doesn't mean one characteristic is easier than the other to have. The bottom line is that you need to focus on what you need to improve on, not if someone has it better than you. Hell, we are not even all shooting for the same goal. Even being attractive can suck as many people will be attracted to you, but that can ruin a relationship with a partner you love if he/she is not able to handle you getting such attention (I am thinking of d-lish's recent thread). Having too much choice can suck also because it can be overwhelming and allow you to overlook a great person.

 

*The only issue I have had with women is this expectation of men having to pay for initial dates. To me, if you are looking for a partner, we are mutually on the hook for what we do.

Edited November 3, 2010 by Sanman

[Pyro]

its obvious in this thread who can and can't handle rejection.

 

Bottom line of this thread is that guys still do a majority of the initiating but dating is not as easy for women as some people seem to think.

[Tim The Enchanter]

And here comes the answer...

 

 

 

Exactly! Whether you are rich or poor, grew up with great parents or no parents, everyone has their OWN issues. On this topic, why do you think that famous people do drugs and alcohol? Go into rehabs constantly, and some even mental facilities? Life isn't always greener on the other side... and that mentality will get you no where quick.

 

You're generalising, I'm not. Are you going to tell me that no one on this planet has an easy life? Having issues does not equate to having it difficult. The fact remains that some people are brought into this world with a silver spoon in their mouth - in other words, they have every opportunity and luxury afforded them and they have much easier life than the rest of us.

 

Oh, and famous people do alcohol and drugs for the same reasons that ordinary people do - because they're fun.

[Tim The Enchanter]

Experiencing suffering be it emotional or physical is just one of those things that's universal and yes, that would go for Paris Hilton too.

 

Well I'm all broke up over Paris Hilton's "suffering". Please.

[Titania22]

Oh, and famous people do alcohol and drugs for the same reasons that ordinary people do - because they're fun.

 

I thought they did them because they were bored.

[harkkam]

Guys what I realize is that it doesn't really matter. The GAME is what it is.

 

You either play the Game or you'll get left behind. That means for Men to do what it is that they have to do and for women to do what they do.

 

Having this discussion isnt going to make women be more sensitive to a mans ego when rejecting them and women aren't going to get rid of those only looking to have sex with them.

 

Its better yet to be the change that you want to see. For men that means that if a women does approach you, and you are not interested that you tell her in a nice way you dont want her the way that YOU would want a woman to tell you.

 

Honestly the answer to this debate is that it doesn't matter really. The game is what it is.

 

Like I said either play it or get played.

[Tim The Enchanter]

I thought they did them because they were bored.

 

Same difference.

[TheMENemy]

Guys what I realize is that it doesn't really matter. The GAME is what it is.

 

You either play the Game or you'll get left behind. That means for Men to do what it is that they have to do and for women to do what they do.

 

Having this discussion isnt going to make women be more sensitive to a mans ego when rejecting them and women aren't going to get rid of those only looking to have sex with them.

 

Its better yet to be the change that you want to see. For men that means that if a women does approach you, and you are not interested that you tell her in a nice way you dont want her the way that YOU would want a woman to tell you.

 

Honestly the answer to this debate is that it doesn't matter really. The game is what it is.

 

Like I said either play it or get played.

 

 

The winningest Game is No Game.

[musemaj11]

Women will settle for a monkey-man if a monkey-man is all that comes to her.

 

I dont know how women do it, but thats the truth.

 

On the other hand, men are more peculiar in what we want. We would rather have nothing than settle for something we dont want.

 

So this is where we men lose.

 

Just last weekend, I saw this cute girl at a soccer game. I was attracted to her but I didnt have the guts to talk to her because I thought she was way out of my league. But then after the game I was shocked to find out that she had a small kid and married to a really fat and ugly guy.

 

The moral of the story, women can afford to wait because they are more willing to settle for much less.

 

No guy on this forum will be single if he is willing to settle for as much less as women are willing to do.

[theBrokenMuse]

Well I'm all broke up over Paris Hilton's "suffering". Please.

All of us are going to experience things in this life to a greater or lesser degree than other people on this planet. Most of us land someplace squarely in the middle. You personally may have suffered less than a person who was sent to a concentration camp but that does not mean that any hardships you have endured were any less profound to you. On the flip side there are also those who have accomplished more than you ever will in this life yet this does not make your own personal victories and achievements any less meaningful to you.

 

To invalidate the experiences of another on the grounds of the notion that their experience is less profound when compared to that of another is to void not only your own experiences based entirely on the whim of subjective opinion but nullify the most basic commonalities among the entire human race.

Edited November 3, 2010 by theBrokenMuse

[Woggle]

All of us are going to experience things in this life to a greater or lesser degree than other people on this planet. Most of us land someplace squarely in the middle. You personally may have suffered less than a person who was sent to a concentration camp but that does not mean that any hardships you have endured were any less profound to you. On the flip side there are also those who have accomplished more than you ever will in this life yet this does not make your own personal victories and achievements any less meaningful to you.

 

To invalidate the experiences of another on the grounds of the notion that their experience is less profound when compared to that of another is to void not only your own experiences based entirely on the whim of subjective opinion but nullify the most basic commonalities among the entire human race.

 

 

I understand what you are saying but I don't have much sympathy for the priviledged who have what many people would kill to have and then go and ruin it. When people who have no clue what it is like to really struggle get all angsty it annoys me.

[donnamaybe]

Did I say women don't have to keep in shape?

Yes, actually, you did.

 

Zero work, eh? Watch what happens when a woman doesn't spend all kinds of time doing her hair and makeup.

Yeah that's the ONLY work you have to do. Men have to do EVERYTHING else and keep in shape, have money, dress well.

[donnamaybe]

No they don't, women are completley unable to take initiatives when it comes to men... but when it comes to everything else it's fine.

 

Women never initiate conversations with men not even with their boyfriend or husband, Women never initiate phone calls to men not even in a long term relationship, Women never initiate dates ever, Women never initiate any kind of intimacy like kisses or hugs or sex with men ever and again not even with their husband/boyfriend.

I'm sorry you've associated with such lackadaisical women.

[donnamaybe]

I don't really have any experience with women(which I have said before

Hmmm..... Interesting how you've made the leap to the sweeping generalizations about them that you've displayed in this thread then.

 

Perhaps you should refrain from speaking with such authority on a subject with which you have no experience.

[donnamaybe]

Utter rubbish. There is a whole spectrum of human experience that ranges from easy living to abject misery. Are you going to tell me that Paris Hilton has a hard life, compared to someone living in Sudan?

We're talking about a gender thing in this thread, not a rich v. poor thing.

 

Stay on topic please. Thanks.

[dispatch3d]

Yeah I really agree with some of the earlier thoughts here. There's a tendency to look at others and think man they put in so little and get so much. When comparing guys to girls in dating it can really get like that. Evidence is everywhere if you look for it. But why ****ing looking for it, why compare, what's the difference to me as a guy. There really is none. Dating takes a skill set, and the skill set is different for women than it is for men. It is that simple. Focus on what us guys need to do and forget that girls have it easy, hard, in the ass lol! doesn't matter. All that really matters is where you are and where you are going, not whether some other person has it particularly difficult or easy.

[donnamaybe]

Yeah I really agree with some of the earlier thoughts here. There's a tendency to look at others and think man they put in so little and get so much. When comparing guys to girls in dating it can really get like that. Evidence is everywhere if you look for it. But why ****ing looking for it, why compare, what's the difference to me as a guy. There really is none. Dating takes a skill set, and the skill set is different for women than it is for men. It is that simple. Focus on what us guys need to do and forget that girls have it easy, hard, in the ass lol! doesn't matter. All that really matters is where you are and where you are going, not whether some other person has it particularly difficult or easy.

Good post!

[sumdude]

I understand what you are saying but I don't have much sympathy for the priviledged who have what many people would kill to have and then go and ruin it. When people who have no clue what it is like to really struggle get all angsty it annoys me.

 

Suffering is relative and part of the human condition. Look at at someone like Howard Hughes, was the richest man in America but was obviously miserable. You can have everything materially yet have nothing or have almost nothing materially and have everything you really need. Empathy cannot be reserved just for the poor.

[Woggle]

Howard Hughes was mentally ill and should have been under psychiatric care. Paris Hilton is just a spoiled brat.

[waynebrady]

Hmmm..... Interesting how you've made the leap to the sweeping generalizations about them that you've displayed in this thread then.

 

Perhaps you should refrain from speaking with such authority on a subject with which you have no experience.

 

Is it really a sweeping generalization when I'm right?

[donnamaybe]

Is it really a sweeping generalization when I'm right?

Is that seriously the best you have? :lmao:

 

How can one know they are right about a subject they have just declared themselves ignorant of?

[waynebrady]

Yes, actually, you did.

 

That's not what I mean't. I know women have to keep in shape and pretty themselves up and dress well and all that. But men also have to keep in shape, look good, dress well. A man can't just look like a bum and get women you know... My point is that the only work women need to do is that, the man does everything else such as initiate dates, initiate phone calls and do all the pursuing. After you have put on all your make up and done your hair and picked out your outfit and everything else that you do, you don't have to put in any more effort because the guy has to do everything else.

[sally4sara]

I don't get ignored by women, I talk to them everyday pretty much but I never try to pursue them and I never approach them in that sense, so it would be impossible for me to be ignored by women that way. And btw grow up and quit it with the personal insults they are ridicilous

 

You've got bigger problems than I thought if that is an insult to you.

 

This is an advise site. What I posted to you was advise. What part of it was and insult? That you are irrational? You are and I know you are because the things you say women have never, in the history of Earth, ever done are things I have done. I have approached guys and I have asked them out.

 

How is it an insult to call you irrational when it is true?

 

Oh W Brady you are perfect in every single way that a person could ever be perfect!

Is that better? Is it true?