Funf Posted November 1, 2010 Posted November 1, 2010 A few weeks ago, a guy messaged me on OKC and although he wasn't the most attractive person that I've talked to on OKC, I liked his profile enough to continue messaging him for a few days and we eventually agreed to meet up. We decide to meet up a week later because I was out of town. During that week-long interval, he sent me text messages constantly and would get annoyed if I took more than an hour to reply. Excuse me, but I'm not glued to my phone 24/7. Our "date" left much to be desired. He picked a really loud restaurant so I could barely hear him. He was even less attractive in person, self-centered, and a poor conversationalist. I didn't flirt with him and made no physical contact because I didn't want him getting the wrong message since I never wanted to see him again. I didn't hear from him after that so I assumed that he got the point. But yesterday, 2 weeks after our date, he sent me a text message. He said that he really liked me, thought we clicked, and wanted to see me again. Wtf? I told him that I wasn't interested, but then he barraged me with text messages trying to convince me otherwise. He finally gave up after a while. First of all, I'm shocked that he thought we clicked. If his definition clicking is represented by our date, then I pity him. Second, if he liked me as much as he said he did, why did he wait 2 weeks to tell me? I assume he kept me on the back burner. Aside from that anecdote/rant, I do have a question: How do you handle someone text messaging often before you initially meet? I prefer little to no contact because I've learned not to build up false chemistry via text messages. I was hoping that my delay in replies would help him get the point that I didn't want to text often but apparently he didn't get it.
Sarah1977 Posted November 1, 2010 Posted November 1, 2010 During that week-long interval, he sent me text messages constantly and would get annoyed if I took more than an hour to reply. Excuse me, but I'm not glued to my phone 24/7. Oh God. This is my pet peeve too. Not just with texts, but with emails/messages. If you don't reply RIGHT AWAY, some guys just get really, really weird. It's a definite turn off. How do you handle someone text messaging often before you initially meet? I prefer little to no contact because I've learned not to build up false chemistry via text messages. I was hoping that my delay in replies would help him get the point that I didn't want to text often but apparently he didn't get it. I don't give out my phone number. When they ask for it so they can exchange texts, I just say, ".....or you can just ask me out on a date. That way, we can talk in person." That way, if he turns into a desperate creep, he doesn't have my number.
sanskrit Posted November 1, 2010 Posted November 1, 2010 When they ask for your phone number in an Email, say you prefer to call them. If they make a fuss over this, nix them. If they give you their number, use the block number on your phone when you call them. After the first date, if you want to see them again, give them your number.
alexlakeman Posted November 1, 2010 Posted November 1, 2010 That sounds creepy. The more I read about all these types of guys the better I see myself lol. If a girl calls me with caller I'd blocked, I just don't answer. What I do, as a guy, is I have an entry in my address book labeled DNA (do not answer). If I go on a date & never want to hear from them again, I move their ph # to this entry. The ring to is set to "silent". Won't stop the texts or calls, but they'll get the message. You have a point in not talking tooo much b4 a first date, you could build up all this chemistry , them you meet and they weren't all that. That's happened to me more than once this year; since I'm busy I can't always go on a date the same week we start talking, so we end up talking on the phone / texting; then we meet and it wasn't all that it's gone the OTHER way too, lol. Been talking to one woman for a week or so, we go out, and nothing, she doesn't feel it for me lol, but if I don't get a response at all to the follow up text (you know, I wait a while for the response, a day or so), I'll send a follow up email "I'll interpret your silence. Good luck on your dating", just to make sure they did actually get the first text.
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