hockeyriot79 Posted October 31, 2010 Posted October 31, 2010 Ok I need some advice and oppinions. My gf and I were together for 2.5 years. I raised her son as mine, he called me dad as his dad signed off and has nothing to do with him. I bought a house and they moved in, I paid all the bills, as she was going to school and didnt work. Life was pretty good until about 3 months ago. All the sudden she changed, became mean, her attitude got very bad, things we had talked about(like where we were going to buy our next house etc.) changed and she didnt want them anymore. We got into a few fights and she would just grab her son, hop in the car and take off for the night to her grandmothers house. I thought that was a bit extreme. Well one night on our way home she started being just evil to me, yelling at me for stupid little things etc. We got to the house and she said she was leaving me and went to her moms for the night. The next day she came home to get clothes as her and her family had a trip planned a few hours away. Things were tense but I apologized and her and her son left on what seemed like decent terms. She texted me a while later saying she was sorry. That night she texted me how sorry she was, missed me, loved me, and could never live without me. The next day they went on their trip. Gone for 4 days she texted me and called me when she could get service. She sent me pics of the two of them on the beach, saying she wishes I was here etc. she came home on a Wednesday night. I was already in bed and she didnt even come in and kiss me and hug me, just said hi, put her stuff down and went into the living room to watch tv. The next day she was very cold, I couldnt hug her or kiss her as she shrugged away, blaming her back problems. Friday she went to a wedding rehersal, got back very late and again cold to me. Saturday she went to the wedding and I never seen her again. She stayed with a friend that night after drinking at the wedding and blew my family get together off that day for a friends dads b-day. she basically told me it was over on the phone. A few days went by and she had shacked up at her moms, saying she needed time etc. Well she eneded up breaking up for good and coming and getting some clothes when I was at work. I tried to mend things but it was going no place fast. I told her if this is what she wanted I would behave like an adult and she can have her things out of the house. Over the next few weeks she got really nasty with me. She insulted me, put me down whenever she could. Her reasons for the breakup were........she needs to fix herself, she needs to find out what she wants in life, she knew she was in a relationship that wasnt meant to be. Now, 9 weeks later she still hasnt got all of her stuff out of my house. She is just evil to me, puts me down, claims I'm out living it up, when she comes to get stuff she takes food out of my fridge and eats some then leaves the rest out on the counter and makes a mess, drinks my beer with the people who are helping her move, smokes in my house, tears pics of us in half and puts my half on the wall, leaves cards behind I had got for her in the past to let me see she doesnt want them. Sorry for the length of that but I'm very confused. I dont get the evil hatred she has for me. She wanted this new life as she said, I have allowed her to get her stuff from the house with out incident. I dont harass her, I leave her alone, she has kept her stuff in my house for two months now since she just took off. One time she just texted me goodnight at 11 pm out of the blue. Then on sweetest day at 1 am she texts me "happy sweetest day F'er". she has her own place now and everything to. Anyone have any ideas what is up here?
Author hockeyriot79 Posted October 31, 2010 Author Posted October 31, 2010 I wanted to say I never cheated on her, treated her bad etc. I did everything I could for her and her son. And now she is treating me like garbage.
Capital P Posted October 31, 2010 Posted October 31, 2010 No, you are letting her treat you like crap. Grow a dick and kick her to touch. only at that point will she start respecting you and start becoming attracted to you again. You have no attraction for her at the mo
nikayla Posted October 31, 2010 Posted October 31, 2010 I agree with Capital P. It is time to put your foot down and refocus on repairing yourself. For starters, pack up her and her son's things and place them onto the porch. Change your locks and your phone number if you have to. Ensure your son (since he is yours) that this has nothing to do with his actions, and that you hope you can keep in touch with him, although this may require a custody hearing. Consider a restraining order if she continues to come around. I also recommend that you see a psychiatrist, religious leader, or health-care professional. Whether it was three days or three months, you are a victim of an abusive relationship. You say that you bought her a house, helped her pay for her education...what exactly did she do for you? Can you honestly list ten times she went out of her way to make your life happier? My boyfriend was involved with a woman with similar characteristics. He chose to stay and make it work. As a result, he attempted to commit suicide, lost his career, and was forced move back in with his parents. Get out now, and never look back!
9Lives Posted October 31, 2010 Posted October 31, 2010 The best thing to do is pack her stuff and drop it off and her mom house with no note and stop talking to her right now. She don't want to be bothered. I would leave her alone. Why u letting her treat u like u did something to her? Are u a lap dog? Did u do something? Are u mister nice guy at any cost? What is wrong with u? If u didn't do anything then she needs to take her raggy ass on.. be happy she left before u made a further investment into her , her son, at the expanse of your finances. Womwn will play u like that.
Author hockeyriot79 Posted October 31, 2010 Author Posted October 31, 2010 Her things are now on the front porch and locks changed. I feel much better!
Author hockeyriot79 Posted October 31, 2010 Author Posted October 31, 2010 (edited) I guess I felt like if I was mean to her I was in some way being mean to the boy. But its done now. Edited October 31, 2010 by hockeyriot79
Cuchara2 Posted October 31, 2010 Posted October 31, 2010 Take all her ****, dump it outside and tell her it's there. Change your locks if she has the key to your house. Why the **** are you still letting her in, and then letting HER disrespect you in YOUR OWN house? Grow a pair. Don't let her trample all over you. It's unattractive and degrading.
9Lives Posted October 31, 2010 Posted October 31, 2010 Say it with me....doormat No seriously..I'm kidding. Really, why are u letting her treat u like sht? Why why why? U put her and her son in a house, paid all the bills, and now u the bad guy? F her!!!!!! Forget about her right now, whts going on with u? The reason wwhy I'm throwing u under the bus is because U CAN'T LET NOBODY TREAT U LIKE SHT! Because 9 times out of 10, they keep treating u like sht. You said u didn't do nothing so she is IMMATURE cause she won't tell u what this is about, she acting like a btch to u...then fine! Put. Her stuff in a garbage badbag, take it her spot, chg the locks, and if u want, tell her when she is ready to be a adult and talk u will meet her somewhere but in the meantime don't start that bs texting I miss u or dump sht ex like to do. Cut her off like saw!
Author hockeyriot79 Posted October 31, 2010 Author Posted October 31, 2010 To be honest, after putting her **** out and changing the locks, I feel great!!! Thanks for the brutal but starightforward advice.
9Lives Posted October 31, 2010 Posted October 31, 2010 To be honest, after putting her **** out and changing the locks, I feel great!!! Thanks for the brutal but starightforward advice. Now stay strong and find a better queen for your castle! You tha man! And no more doormat behavior
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