I'm lost?

[flaka]

I dont even know were to begin, but it all started last yr when i was pregnant with my 2 child and my husband started to change so much..so many txts,lateness on the computer, and leaving every weekend to his 2 job which is djing at a club..i always tried to talk to him and ask what was going on but he would never tell me aything he would just get aggrevated so i would just stop..many people that knew me and as well as my mom told me he was proballi behavin u know..cheating but i guess i never took that step of witnessing it with my eyes but did ask him which he neglected..until this yr a month after my baby was born ..my mon came to me again and told me again u should go spy on him when he dj's..which i didnt..instead i finally looked at the cell bills and found a number and called it and yup it was a gir...well varios..but he talked more to one in general. I confronted him and well we broke up for a month and it was horrrible i was one month aliviated from my baby so i got depressed , i stoped working, i didnt care for much, i realli got hurt...

Well after that month we got together agian and he promised he would change..whitch i believed. I asked him questions on why he did it and he said because of all the time argueing and my mood..and i asked him if he had sex with her he said no...witch i did not believe..so i investigated and it came to b true and i told him and he finalli admitted he did when of course i couldnt have sex with him because of my new born. I also asked him if he used a condon he said yes and i said because im worrid about my health. Anyways one day i checked on his cell and sow a message and it was from her.. I asked him and he got angered and said it was nothing and left. I said ok change ur number he said no...and agian a couple weeks later i found anthor txt from her to him..i told him it had to stop and he said he would but it didnt happen..he did change his number and all but his friend that djs with him talked to one of the girls friend and told my husband something that shocked me..i found another txt but this time by email whitch he thought i would not know..and i asked him again and he told me to leave her and not to do nothing cus i told him i was going to report her to the police and thats when he told me his friend told him she was pregnant with twins..i didnt yell at him or nothing instead i told him i will respect your decision in helping them or what ever but if u want to b with me still this has to end now..i made him call her infront of me to tell her he was only playing with her and to stop bothing him and he did. That ended but she still insisted in bothering until i told her to stop and that if she didnt want him to take responsibliy of the babies to stop botherin and she also did not want to take a dna..so that made me wonder..

After that i was so upset and told him i wanted to leave to my country we did for 5 months and he did change and all but my problem now is that i cant stop thinkin about it..even when i have intimisy with him its so different its not the same feeling. I do care for him and have feelings for him but not the same when u see that special someone and feel butterflys...and also he says he dont trust me no more cuz he says when we argued about the theme i know and reconise i said i would do the same and what if i went and slept with someone just cuz.. I dont like that at all and he knows i didnt mean it but know i have to suffer the consicuenses which he did and not me. Im the one feelin worried and unsecure of him..i have little trust in him and i know if i want to continue i have to let go. Im afraid of what might come and i know that this girls pregancy is going to come up sooner or later and he says he dont care about it but i dont know about that? The babies should be born this end of the month or beging of nov. Cus my baby was only one month when he had sex with her..but i dont kno if its even his and those kids have no fault but he dont wanna take the dna test or her. Her respond was he knows when we did it and he knows when they r goin to b born.

But that dont mean anything im a mother and im just pist at all this but i dont want more problems should i just let it go and act like it dont exsist cus i know she is sayin there his and many know him since he djs. I'v been with him for 7 yrs and im confused on what im feeling even though he is really tring but i still got that fear and then this (the twins)? I dont want to mess this know that he feels guilt and changing for me and my two kids. I dont know how to even start or i just dont know??

[cjay]

Hello...I really feel for you...I am in the same position as you with my wife. Well, we are similar in instances.

 

I do pray that things will go accordingly so that you are happy and not lost...

[goingstrong]

Flaka, You'll get more responses if you add some punctuation. I developed a headache reading that.