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Need some ... new to this! kind of long sorry!


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Posted

Hi! ok so I just recently moved in with my boyfriend! We are both 24 and have been dating for 2 years. He's my best friend without a doubt and I have never experienced a relationship like this before, I am so in love. BUT! you would think being a hot young couple in love and just moving in together sex would be non-stop right?... WRONG!

 

We have sex once a week to once every 2 weeks. Its crazy! We used to just make out at random and get into it and I want that back. I'm afraid to initiate things sometimes because I'm afraid of being rejected. I have put it in my head that he's no longer attracted to me, which increased feelings of insecurities. Its a mental cycle I go through almost every day! I.E. I want to be flirty and frisky, then I get a mental warning sign saying"No Don't... your not attractive and he'll reject you!" so then I don't, and we don't have sex. So I see how I have affected our sexual relationship.

 

However, I do send some sexy texts that are sometimes explicit and would get a guy's blood pumping, but he replies with a "haha" or "me to". It hurts because he doesn't get excited when I talk to him like that. I want vamp things up because I am so utterly attracted to him I look at him sometimes and wonder why he's with me, not to sound pathetic. I had a talk with him l approximately 2 months ago. I was so hurt when I got dressed up for our friends wedding and he completely overlooked me, not even a simple "I like your dress." Nothing! After I brought that up he said, "your like my dude!" - Which I get what he means that we can just be best friends and I am that girlfriend that he can be himself around without walking on glass. But I don't feel pretty anymore. He said I didn't think I had to tell you, you were pretty, I thought you knew."

I stopped dressing up and doing my hair because its worthless and I feel ridiculous. I lie... I was blow drying my hair one night and he said-"why are you doing that?" not in a nasty way but he didn't understand why I had out three different brushes and hair serum. I felt so stupid. especially bc thats what comments on- nothing else.

Don't get me wrong Im not a complete bum- I shower and am completely lady-scaped, but when we are home I just throw on a big T over my V.S. undies and am ready to hang out.

What can I do to make him want me again?

Posted
We have sex once a week to once every 2 weeks. Its crazy! We used to just make out at random and get into it and I want that back. I'm afraid to initiate things sometimes because I'm afraid of being rejected. I have put it in my head that he's no longer attracted to me, which increased feelings of insecurities. Its a mental cycle I go through almost every day! I.E. I want to be flirty and frisky, then I get a mental warning sign saying"No Don't... your not attractive and he'll reject you!" so then I don't, and we don't have sex. So I see how I have affected our sexual relationship.

 

This is exactly wrong. Act on it. Do it everytime you feel like.

 

If he rejects you, it's not because you are too active but because there's another problem. If he doesn't - problem solved ;)

Posted

Find someone else; statistically speaking you are likely not going to grow old with this kid. You are the ideal candidate for cheating, ie you dress sexy / look hot at a party, your bf doesn't even notice you, but another hot guy checks you out, says you look sexy, tells you how lucky your bf is having a sexy woman like you; and before you know the new guy helps you cheat on your bf and clearly realize your bf doesn't give a sh.it about you. Gd luck

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Posted

I would never cheat. I have no desire to cheat or want anyone else

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