wander1991 Posted October 29, 2010 Posted October 29, 2010 Hey, guys, I just thought I’d share with you that I couldn’t talk to my crush today at our college club meeting tonight. I feel really disappointed in myself and wish that I never felt this way.Even though I talked to her a couple of times just for small talk, I don’t think I have shown her the real fun person that I believe I am. I met a good friend of hers, while I tried talking to my crush and we seem like we are pretty good friends although only downside is when my crush comes and says hi to her friend and not to me. I just don’t get why I have a crush on someone when I don’t know their personality that well, love on first sight really sucks to have. I feel like I could approach her again if there was no one, I don’t know why I feel like I’m chained up and can’t move when I have friends I’m sitting next to and chatting with. Maybe it is because I don’t want to feel like I’m ditching them for someone? I always thought it would be easy to talk to someone who shares the same nerdy interests as I, but it seems like that is not the case. I don’t feel like giving up yet, my crush seems to be always sitting alone and watching videos on youtube while randomly saying hello to some of her club friends from the year before and that maybe the time I can try to approach her or if I bump to her on campus. Sorry for making you read this boring wall of text, but if you have any encouraging words or advice it would be appreciated.
Titania22 Posted October 29, 2010 Posted October 29, 2010 It's not boring. You sound exactly like me when I get a crush. Stupid isn't it, how we can be so confident and communicative, until we are faced with someone we really like. I have never found the answer so I don't know how to encourage you, but I love the feeling. It's nice to think, even at my age, it is still possible to come across someone who can make me forget how to speak/think/behave. Good luck!
Sabali Posted October 29, 2010 Posted October 29, 2010 Don't beat yourself up over it, man. I firmly believe that one of the secrets to success is to not dwell on past failures. Forget what has happened. Forget that you didn't approach her. It's all in the past and you will move forward from this point. Another secret to success is to become to person you wish to become, you have to believe you are that person right at this moment. If you want to become a person that can easily approach the woman you are interested in and hold a nice conversation with her you have to believe in your heart that you are that person right now. You don't have trouble talking to anyone. You feel comfortable around everyone. Everyone likes you because you are such a cool person. This is what you have to believe. The power of thought rules your whole life, guy. It really does. You will talk to that woman the next time you see her. Make that commitment. Forget what you will say. Don't rehearse it. Just walk up and start talking. Don't think about it. Whatever you do, do not hold a premeditated conversation with her. Just walk up to her and talk. Let the conversation be spontaneous. What you are concerned with here is not saying something stupid but learning how to talk to absolutely anyone spontaneously.
Author wander1991 Posted October 29, 2010 Author Posted October 29, 2010 Titania22, thanks for replying. It's good to know I'm not the only one out there. I haven't come across many that made me feel this way. I would say this is the third time that I ever really had a crush and I'm hoping that I could reach this one. The whole thought process changes, such as not thinking of sexual thoughts whatsoever and just thinking of what it would be like to hangout with the person and having them smile to you. What is your age by the way? Sabali, thanks for also replying with such great words. I'm actually happy that I could read a reply like this when I just had to check if someone replied since I can't go to sleep due to thinking of my crush. I would very much like to be the person you described and be the same goofball that I can be around friends and not worry about what she is thinking about me. I will try that commitment next time I see her. Just a question, is your encouraging advice coming from experience?
Titania22 Posted October 29, 2010 Posted October 29, 2010 Titania22, thanks for replying. It's good to know I'm not the only one out there. I haven't come across many that made me feel this way. I would say this is the third time that I ever really had a crush and I'm hoping that I could reach this one. The whole thought process changes, such as not thinking of sexual thoughts whatsoever and just thinking of what it would be like to hangout with the person and having them smile to you. What is your age by the way? I so know what you mean. I was totally crushing on a guy about a month ago, and he would smile and wave whenever he saw me, which was awesome. And I made the mistake of making a move, sure I got a brief hug, but he never smiled at me again and any semblance of a friendship I had building was gone. I think I could have lived happy for a long time, just from that smile. I'm in my 30's, and my friends are all around 50 or 12. I am not friends with anyone my age. What can I say? I am a bit of a special case . Can I assume from your name you are around 19?
Sabali Posted October 29, 2010 Posted October 29, 2010 . Just a question, is your encouraging advice coming from experience? You bet it does. It is the foundation of who I am today. I live, eat, and breathe these concepts.
Author wander1991 Posted October 29, 2010 Author Posted October 29, 2010 Yeah, I'm 19. What type of move was it that turned the person in the other direction, Titania22? Was it that you told him you liked him? It is pretty cool that you have friends from a variety of ages except your own, I'm the other way around . I chatted with her friend earlier today and they are hanging out on the weekend and I said I'll ask em both if they wanna hangout next week after I'm done some tests and she said she'll ask her friend(crush). If everything works out well it might help me know my crush better and become friends. Sabali, it is great that they work for you. When was it that you adopted those concepts and where did you learn em? The first time I was going to talk to the girl I was gonna ask her if the donuts beside her are any good, but that didn't work out. I just went and grabbed the donuts and went back to sit down. Although, I was happy I went and said something around the last 15 minutes remaining(this happened as well with another crush of mine at night school).
Sabali Posted October 29, 2010 Posted October 29, 2010 Sabali, it is great that they work for you. When was it that you adopted those concepts and where did you learn em? I was the same age as you when I adopted those concepts. I learned them from too many sources to point to any specific one. Human interactions are my most important sources for anything in life. Really.
Titania22 Posted October 30, 2010 Posted October 30, 2010 Yeah, I'm 19. What type of move was it that turned the person in the other direction, Titania22? Was it that you told him you liked him? It is pretty cool that you have friends from a variety of ages except your own, I'm the other way around . I chatted with her friend earlier today and they are hanging out on the weekend and I said I'll ask em both if they wanna hangout next week after I'm done some tests and she said she'll ask her friend(crush). If everything works out well it might help me know my crush better and become friends. I gave him a note stating that I wanted to have sex with him, and it turned out he was in a committed relationship. I wouldn't of even made a move if he hadn't been messing around with his relationship FB status and writing moody FB status update a couple weeks earlier. I thought he was single and ready for some rebound sex. Damn me for taking FB too seriously. BTW he is 19. Good move on your part with the potential for hanging our with her and her friend. If you can think of some question you want to ask her (like about her interests or what she like to do for fun, or if she has any ambitions, etc) before hand, and hold onto it, in case an opportunity to ask while hanging out. I find it is easier to get through the brain freeze if I have pre-thought of something to say.
Author wander1991 Posted October 30, 2010 Author Posted October 30, 2010 Facebook is a disease, but we all use it:laugh:. I added the girl a few weeks ago and she just accepted and turns out she is not a heavy user herself so that method of contact pretty much went down the drain. Yeah, It is cool that there is a potential hangout next week although I feel bad about the situation that I'm in. I met my crush's friend when they were both together in hopes of getting to know my crush, but me and her friend are pretty good friends now(msn and real life every now and then), but I don't my friend to like find out that I have a crush on her friend because maybe it would seem like I am using her to get to my crush when in reality that is not how I want it to be. If everything works out in my favor it would be cool, but the problem is the crush seems to be in like her own zone at least that is how it was when I talked to her for small amount that I was able to achieve. Hopefully I'll get maybe a number or email and everything would sail in the direction I want it to be because right now I can't stop thinking about her when it is exam time after what she wore on thursday
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