Age differences

[Silly_Girl]

I didn't say you were capable of making stupid decisions at 16. I said at 16 you are far from an adult.

 

I lived with my parents at 16, but they fondly referred to it as 'lodging' I did my washing, some of my meals, paid my way, worked full-time and then some. I went for meals out with friends, went to pubs and clubs every weekend, had saved the money up and bought my own car ready for my 17th birthday, I took good care of my dog and visited my grandparents regularly. I led a pretty independent life and made my own decisions. I had left school at 15, many youngsters are in full-time education until well in to their twenties.

 

There can be huge differences between a 16 year old and a 16 year old.

[UnifiedFieldTheory]

When I was 24, fit, and quite handsome, I dated a woman that was 50. She was attractive, smart, and an executive at an insurance company. We were both single. She was so very appreciative of my time and affection. Great sex too. She would write me pages upon pages of poetry, great dinners out, some vacations. It was nice to be so very appreciated. She was afraid her co-workers would discover our dating and eventually eased out. (She was afraid her reputation in the business community would be tarnished.) I cared for her - but no - she wasn't the love of my life... but 26 years later, I went to her funeral services.

[GreenEyedLady]

if 16 is the age of consent where you are, then I'd say the lawmakers there have no problem with old men putting it to their 16 year old daughters:o

 

Now 30 is an old man?

 

I know you're SOMEWHERE around that age. I don't think you meant that, do you?

[Dexter Morgan]

Now 30 is an old man?

 

 

when messing around with a child, yes.

[OWoman]

People mature at different rates, and some age more quickly than others. Age differences and compatibility depend on the individuals.

 

My father was 6 years older than my mother. They were totally incompatible, but I wouldn't necessarily blame that on age differences. My father is 25 years older than his W - and they're perfectly compatible.

 

My H's xW was older than him - but she was always mistaken for being many decades older than her biological age, and many people assumed she was his mother rather than his W. (It's interesting how many of his colleagues have commented on "how much younger" he looks these days - and he does dress very differently, and laughs and smiles a lot more which always makes someone look younger.)

 

Many of my friends are older (as in, decades) than me, and it works well. Others are decades younger, and that works too. (Some of my friends are around my own age, too...) The individual's mental, experiential and emotional ages matter more to me in ANY R than their biological age.

[pureinheart]

Wow...SG, you got one going...I LOVE IT...

 

OMG people chill out, I was working long before I turned 16....

 

And if there is such an issue, why not get involved with the real child trafficing that is going on using children as sex slaves and such...make your time worth while.

 

If your interested in getting involved with an organization that is extremely involved with the rights of children...and I'm talking from babies on up that REAL crimes happen to PM me and I'll send you in the right direction.

[pureinheart]

Wow, what would you guys say about an older woman with a way younger man...I've been there before, but it didn't work for me.

 

To me, age doesnot matter, it's the inner person, the maturity level. Now the man has to be older, at least a year:D

[GorillaTheater]

Wow, what would you guys say about an older woman with a way younger man...I've been there before, but it didn't work for me.

 

I've been there too. Had a hell of alot of fun.

 

To me, age doesnot matter, it's the inner person, the maturity level. Now the man has to be older, at least a year:D

 

Age doesn't matter to me either. Except if the age happens to fall into the range of legal minority. Particularly in the case of my legal minor daughters. We're not that far removed from the "Old West" here. I could probably kill the 30+ year old bastard and walk.

[Star_Bright]

I've been there too. Had a hell of alot of fun.

 

 

 

Age doesn't matter to me either. Except if the age happens to fall into the range of legal minority. Particularly in the case of my legal minor daughters. We're not that far removed from the "Old West" here. I could probably kill the 30+ year old bastard and walk.

 

Yeah I can't believe people here think it's okay for a 16-year-old to date a 30-year-old. Yuck. He'd just be a perv. And this is coming from me who had a *much* older MM. The difference? I'm almost 30 and have a lot more life experience and ability to make my own decisions than a 16 year old. (Not saying my xMM isn't still a perv - just that I knew exactly what I was getting into!) I don't care how mature the 16 year old is, there's no way that a 30-year-old dating her could have her best interests at heart. Yuck-o!

[Silly_Girl]

Yeah I can't believe people here think it's okay for a 16-year-old to date a 30-year-old. Yuck. He'd just be a perv. And this is coming from me who had a *much* older MM. The difference? I'm almost 30 and have a lot more life experience and ability to make my own decisions than a 16 year old. (Not saying my xMM isn't still a perv - just that I knew exactly what I was getting into!) I don't care how mature the 16 year old is, there's no way that a 30-year-old dating her could have her best interests at heart. Yuck-o!

 

So, he and I perceived the age difference to be 5 yrs or so. He seemed younger I seemed older. We went out twice. No sex. I made my own decisions.

 

The age difference in your R made me feel very .

 

[GreenEyedLady]

So, he and I perceived the age difference to be 5 yrs or so. He seemed younger I seemed older. We went out twice. No sex. I made my own decisions.

 

The age difference in your R made me feel very .

 

 

You don't have to explain. Look at who the posters are and take it with a grain of salt.

 

Apparently, some of us in America have no idea that social norms vary according to culture.

 

GEL

[NoIDidn't]

You don't have to explain. Look at who the posters are and take it with a grain of salt.

 

Apparently, some of us in America have no idea that social norms vary according to culture.

 

GEL

 

Yeah, but even in Britain a 30yo dating a 16yo is not the "norm". Its not unusual for people in Western countries to frown upon "old" men that should know better attempting to date a teenager. A teenager is still a child. The feelings aren't for the 16yo, they are against the 30yo doing so. I'm not surprised that anyone feels his actions were disgusting.

 

I say this as one that dated a man in his twenties, actually two men at different times of course, when I was younger than 16. And I would absolutely kill any man/woman thinking they were going to date my teenaged children in their twenties and thirties.

[pureinheart]

Goodness, we'd definitely not have been chums at school, GG and JT!! I was NOWHERE NEAR as wayward as a lot of girls my age, and my friends were from a single-sex grammar. They were the ones whose parents were bank managers and lawyers and doctors. Those parents thought they knew what their kids were up to. I definitely had a mild rebellion phase, which I thoroughly enjoyed!! It surprises me to hear when some women say they never had that. Most women I know, in all walks of life, had a phase of sneaking off and being where they shouldn't.

 

All of my friends had parents that bought them cars and let them do priddy much whatever. You can bet your sweet bippy I snuck out to party!

 

SG, what blew my mind, especially concerning your thread...and this was back in the early 70's ...I was in eighth grade ...EIGHTH GRADE...most of the girls were already with way older men. I was sitting in class one day and the girls behind me were saying how many times they "did it"...naive me turns around and says "did what?"...I still didn't get it until later on in life.

[jennie-jennie]

It's pretty universal for 16 to be the age of consent.

 

Speak for yourself - at 16, I was certainly capable of knowing whether I wanted sex or not, and who with; and certainly capable of saying yes or no. Perhaps in some parts of the world (or, some parts of the US? I don't know where else the age of consent isn't 16...) kids are brought up to mature later, but certainly IME 16 year olds all over the world are mature enough to say yes or no to sex - and in many cases have been sexually active well before then.

 

15 is the age of consent in my country. We have a youth clinic where the kids can go and get birth control. They are welcome even at the ages of 13 and 14. They will get birth control pills if they so wish at this age without any cost and the parents will not be informed. If you call as a parent knowing your kid is on birth control, they still will not discuss your child with you. This is governed by laws of patient confidentiality.

 

So the state helps 13- and 14-year-olds with birth control even though the legal age for having sex is 15. The way the law looks at it is if a 20- or 30-year old has sex with a minor under the age of 15, it would be illegal, but if a 16-year old has sex with a 14-year old it would pass because of the proximity of the ages. And the same if both kids are under 15.

 

Some of the best sex I ever had was at 17 with my 16 year old boyfriend. I am sure glad I didn't miss out on that. :love:

[jennie-jennie]

Yeah, but even in Britain a 30yo dating a 16yo is not the "norm". Its not unusual for people in Western countries to frown upon "old" men that should know better attempting to date a teenager. A teenager is still a child. The feelings aren't for the 16yo, they are against the 30yo doing so. I'm not surprised that anyone feels his actions were disgusting.

 

I say this as one that dated a man in his twenties, actually two men at different times of course, when I was younger than 16. And I would absolutely kill any man/woman thinking they were going to date my teenaged children in their twenties and thirties.

 

My oldest daughter had a long term relationship from the age of 17 or so with a man about 10 years her senior. I had no problem with that. He is a great guy.

[GreenEyedLady]

Yeah, but even in Britain a 30yo dating a 16yo is not the "norm". Its not unusual for people in Western countries to frown upon "old" men that should know better attempting to date a teenager. A teenager is still a child. The feelings aren't for the 16yo, they are against the 30yo doing so. I'm not surprised that anyone feels his actions were disgusting.

 

I say this as one that dated a man in his twenties, actually two men at different times of course, when I was younger than 16. And I would absolutely kill any man/woman thinking they were going to date my teenaged children in their twenties and thirties.

 

My grandma was married at 16, as was my great-grandma. Now they didn't marry 30 year olds, but come on people, that was the norm in United States and England less than 100 years ago.

 

The United States and England are not the only cultures in the world. There are many other countries in the world with different societal norms and mores. Diversity, you know. I think we all need to exercise some cultural sensitivity here.

 

GEL

[Dexter Morgan]

My grandma was married at 16, as was my great-grandma. Now they didn't marry 30 year olds, but come on people, that was the norm in United States and England less than 100 years ago.

 

ya, and so was the ability to shoot someone dead legally as long as it was a "fair fight"

 

maybe that should still be allowed too

[BentSpine]

When I was 24, fit, and quite handsome, I dated a woman that was 50. She was attractive, smart, and an executive at an insurance company. We were both single. She was so very appreciative of my time and affection. Great sex too. She would write me pages upon pages of poetry, great dinners out, some vacations. It was nice to be so very appreciated. She was afraid her co-workers would discover our dating and eventually eased out. (She was afraid her reputation in the business community would be tarnished.) I cared for her - but no - she wasn't the love of my life... but 26 years later, I went to her funeral services.

UnifiedFieldTheory, your story resonated with me and your caring for your lady shows clearly through.

[NoIDidn't]

My grandma was married at 16, as was my great-grandma. Now they didn't marry 30 year olds, but come on people, that was the norm in United States and England less than 100 years ago.

 

The United States and England are not the only cultures in the world. There are many other countries in the world with different societal norms and mores. Diversity, you know. I think we all need to exercise some cultural sensitivity here.

 

GEL

 

You missed my point. My great grand married a 45yo when she was 15. Believe me, you aren't the only one with stories of someone born in the early 1900s that married really young to someone considered really old by today's standards.

 

My point was that the judgment is for the MAN in this equation, not for the young girl. Or even for her parents.

 

And stating that England and the US aren't the only cultures in the world further misses the point.

 

Cultural ignorance might be a little more appropriate than cultural insensitivity. I think many of the posters forget that the poster that was 16 is now much older and that situation likely happened in the 60s and 70s when such a pairing was much more common and accepted than now.

 

EIther way, they are questioning the 30yo's faculties, not the then-16yo's. Most 16yo girls, mature for their age or not, are going to think its pretty cool to get the interest of a 30 year old. So the concern is that the young girl is not being taken advantage of, not that she's loose and lacks morals.

[112233]

I'm a lot older than my GF and she seems OK with it.

[112233]

got one word.......statutory

 

As in ignorant of the laws and statutes?

[stillafool]

An adult man aged 30 dating a 16yo child is just sick, and is even sicker if he is having sex with her. He must have had some major malfunction

 

I know! Yuk! His malfunction - pedophilia.

[112233]

I know! Yuk! His malfunction - pedophilia.

 

Pedophilia requires one to be attracted sexually to sexually immature persons.

[GreenEyedLady]

ya, and so was the ability to shoot someone dead legally as long as it was a "fair fight"

 

maybe that should still be allowed too

 

Dex, that hasn't been legal in the last 100 years. If you're thinking how the west was won, it was a little bit longer than that.

 

GEL

[Silly_Girl]

I know! Yuk! His malfunction - pedophilia.

 

Look it up - dictionary!