Taramere Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 I have a question about American culture. This might not be the right section, but as it was inspired by another thread in this section I thought I'd put it in here. What I want to know is this. Whether you're at High School now, or whether you attended 20+ years ago, with regard the appointment of a "King/Queen" of the High School Prom, is this a) An honour that any self respecting teen could base a lifetime of high self esteem upon, or b) A humiliation to be avoided using all legal means at one's disposal?
tigressA Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 (edited) B. It's really annoying when you see those people who enter college all pompous because they were announced king or queen of their high school likely for very little to no reason. There aren't too many cases I've seen wherein "kings" and "queens" are genuinely well-liked by the majority of their peers. In fact, I've seen several instances in my own school, in my own class, where the students would elect people they really didn't like just as a joke. I was nominated for prom queen my senior year (no idea how, but there were 10 candidates total), and I heard it was only just in hopes that my archnemesis would be nominated for king and everyone would see us dance together if we won. Luckily he never bought a ticket. Edited October 27, 2010 by tigressA
2sure Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 Its generally just a fun thing to do at the prom . Everyone gets to nominate and vote for couples they would like to see crowned for the evening. Its more a party game than anything else. Its nothing you would include on your college application like being class president might be.
quankanne Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 more of a social thing, like homecoming royalty ... though homecoming is a pretty big deal in my hometown (hell, throughout the state, because it's tied in with football, which is king in Texas). funny, but I can't remember who was nominated king and queen at my senior prom. I know it wasn't the popular couple that were named the "Mr. and Mrs. (Name) High School," which is funny when I think about it. as for it meaning anything, no, I don't think telling anyone that you were elected Prom Queen is going to impress them ... and after a certain age, no one gives a rat's rump if you tell them you were the Homecoming Queen!
flying Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 Haha, good question. I don't remember it being that big of a deal at my school...but my high school was the size of a small college (800 kids in my year alone) so it could just be the dilution effect. Most people didn't really know most people. I honestly don't remember who won, although I assume someone did. I also don't know if there was any kind of ceremony, spotlight dance, blood-soaked room (just watched Carrie the other night) or what-have-you. I do remember that my friends and I had awesome dresses from a fabulous vintage shop. My dress was gorgeous, a vintage 1950's black mermaid-cut dress. I still have it.
EasyHeart Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 If you are the King or Queen, it's "A"; if you're not, you pretend it's "B". When I was in high school, the prom king and queen were the most attractive and popular kids in the class. I don't remember who our prom king was, but our queen was a gorgeous blonde who was very bright and very sweet to everyone, and I had a terrible crush on her all through high school.
Author Taramere Posted October 27, 2010 Author Posted October 27, 2010 B. It's really annoying when you see those people who enter college all pompous because they were announced king or queen of their high school likely for very little to no reason. There aren't too many cases I've seen wherein "kings" and "queens" are genuinely well-liked by the majority of their peers. In fact, I've seen several instances in my own school, in my own class, where the students would elect people they really didn't like just as a joke. I was nominated for prom queen my senior year (no idea how, but there were 10 candidates total), and I heard it was only just in hopes that my archnemesis would be nominated for king and everyone would see us dance together if we won. Luckily he never bought a ticket. Thanks, tigressA. That's what I wondered.....if it's actually something people would be pleased about, or if it's more commonly the case that people people will nominate their enemies or friends as prom royalty in order to embarrass them.
Feelin Frisky Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 Since I'm an old cuss I went to HS when it was still very uncool to conform to any such tradition as proms. Being in an all boys Catholic HS didn't exactly create social pressure around who is going to the prom with whom either. So, the prom meant nothing to me except the idea of taking down my freak flag and living out some "Happy Days" 50's farce for a night. Needless to say I skipped it (my graduation ceremony too. I'd just as soon be corn-holed by a porcupine than prance around in a gown with a mortar board and tassel cap on my head).
flying Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 Thanks, tigressA. That's what I wondered.....if it's actually something people would be pleased about, or if it's more commonly the case that people people will nominate their enemies or friends as prom royalty in order to embarrass them. Oh, I see...at my school I think they were serious about it, sadly. Had it been a joke, perhaps I would have remembered it...
Stung Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 My high school didn't do the prom royalty thing. I always thought of it as kind of a half-ass popularity contest, which the really cool kids wouldn't even bother to vote in, much less participate in. Edit: Tara, my impression has been that some people might nominate friends in order to embarrass them, but there is the Cult of Cheerleader who takes it seriously and considers it an accomplishment.
GorillaTheater Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 Since I'm an old cuss I went to HS when it was still very uncool to conform to any such tradition as proms. Me too. We threw a kegger on at least one prom night. Beat the hell out of wearing a tux.
tigressA Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 Other than prom, my HS has homecoming and "winter carnival"--which is the only one that has a prince and princess for each underclass as well as king and queen for the seniors. Junior year, I was nominated for princess. Another nominee was this arrogant girl who no one liked. She thought her s*it didn't stink. But our peers also nominated one of the "popular" guys who was a total ass, and those two really didn't like each other. They won, but the ass got into a sledding accident after drinking one night and was temporarily paralyzed, so the runner-up, a genuinely well-liked, popular, good-looking guy--who the arrogant girl had a big crush on at the time--took his place. So she got her fairytale moment while everyone else was red in the face. :laugh: My brother's senior year, the prom queen ended up being this mentally handicapped girl. I still don't know if that was any more than a joke.
EasyHeart Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 At my school it was definitely considered serious and there were never any "joke" nominations. It certainly wasn't the end-all-and-be-all of the year, and everyone knew it was going to be one out of 3 or 4 people. It certainly didn't change anything -- the king and queen were already popular -- and I suspect it probably mattered to the runners-up (though I didn't move in those social circles!)
tigressA Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 Even when it seemed my high school took it seriously, the people who tended to be nominated all ran in the same social circle--they were all really upper-middle-class, good-looking and dated each other, hung out with each other, and were condescending to pretty much everyone else. It was like "Mean Girls"--the popularity was borne out of fear/fascination rather than being genuinely well-liked by most of the school. No wonder I hated it there so much.
Author Taramere Posted October 27, 2010 Author Posted October 27, 2010 Haha, good question. I don't remember it being that big of a deal at my school...but my high school was the size of a small college (800 kids in my year alone) so it could just be the dilution effect. Most people didn't really know most people. I honestly don't remember who won, although I assume someone did. I also don't know if there was any kind of ceremony, spotlight dance, blood-soaked room (just watched Carrie the other night) or what-have-you. I do remember that my friends and I had awesome dresses from a fabulous vintage shop. My dress was gorgeous, a vintage 1950's black mermaid-cut dress. I still have it. Haha re Carrie. That's what I tend to think of re the Prom Queen/King thing. We had a sixth year dance at school, but I left in fifth so I didn't attend that. From the pictures, they were always fairly staid affairs that were also well attended by teachers. Your dress sounds lovely. When I was in high school, the prom king and queen were the most attractive and popular kids in the class. I don't remember who our prom king was, but our queen was a gorgeous blonde who was very bright and very sweet to everyone, and I had a terrible crush on her all through high school. So it wasn't considered in any way cringeworthy at your school for people to be appointed as school Royalty? Since I'm an old cuss I went to HS when it was still very uncool to conform to any such tradition as proms. Being in an all boys Catholic HS didn't exactly create social pressure around who is going to the prom with whom either. So, the prom meant nothing to me except the idea of taking down my freak flag and living out some "Happy Days" 50's farce for a night. Needless to say I skipped it (my graduation ceremony too. I'd just as soon be corn-holed by a porcupine than prance around in a gown with a mortar board and tassel cap on my head). Okay, there's a perspective I can relate to a bit more. Edit: Tara, my impression has been that some people might nominate friends in order to embarrass them, but there is the Cult of Cheerleader who takes it seriously and considers it an accomplishment. I have the feeling that I wouldn't have lasted a minute in an American High School. It's interesting to get these responses. This is a subject that has intrigued me from time to time, but I'd never thought to post a question about it before.
EasyHeart Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 So it wasn't considered in any way cringeworthy at your school for people to be appointed as school Royalty? Not at all. It wasn't something that was too much on my radar, since I was never going to be nominated for anything like that, and I was never going to date anyone who was! But it certainly wasn't embarrassing at all. I have the feeling that I wouldn't have lasted a minute in an American High School. It's interesting to get these responses. This is a subject that has intrigued me from time to time, but I'd never thought to post a question about it before.High school is Hell. That's why Buffy the Vampire Slayer was such a brilliant show!
tigressA Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 I have the feeling that I wouldn't have lasted a minute in an American High School. It's interesting to get these responses. This is a subject that has intrigued me from time to time, but I'd never thought to post a question about it before. If you have that feeling, then yeah, consider it true. I graduated 5 years and some months ago and have grown a hell of a lot since, but high school was the root cause of my self-esteem issues. The bane of my existence. I still can hardly speak of it in a favorable way.
tigressA Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 High school is Hell. That's why Buffy the Vampire Slayer was such a brilliant show! BUFFY! That's my favorite show EVER! :love: OK, sorry for the t/j.
Jannah Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 BUFFY! That's my favorite show EVER! :love: OK, sorry for the t/j. I love that show too. They have reruns on all the time on (I forget the channel name, but it is a gay cable network channel).
Author Taramere Posted October 27, 2010 Author Posted October 27, 2010 High school is Hell. That's why Buffy the Vampire Slayer was such a brilliant show! If you have that feeling, then yeah, consider it true. I graduated 5 years and some months ago and have grown a hell of a lot since, but high school was the root cause of my self-esteem issues. The bane of my existence. I still can hardly speak of it in a favorable way. I'm sorry you had a rough time. I've often wondered about the extent to which the High School experience seems to scar a lot of people for a long time. I didn't enjoy school...but bar a couple of girls I didn't get along with, it was the teachers rather than the other pupils who were my problem. I ended up leaving early and sitting the necessary exams for university externally, before my confidence got completely demolished. I enjoyed university a lot, but school was simply a purgatory I had to tolerate from 9am to 4pm on weekdays. I could never understand people who chose to participate in extra-curricular activities. On the other hand, it was a single sex school so there wasn't the incentive of boys to hang around at school for any longer than necessary. Still, people I know who went to mixed schools seemed to regard school in a similar light. Not an environment you wanted to hang around in for any longer than necessary.
tigressA Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 I love that show too. They have reruns on all the time on (I forget the channel name, but it is a gay cable network channel). Logo. But I have all the seasons on DVD, so... I also wasn't into extracurriculars for the reason you mentioned, Tara. Though I did find my niche in the drama/musical theater group by my senior year. That was by far the best year.
tigressA Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 I have to say, though my years in HS were an abomination that no one should have to suffer, I did feel a bit sorry for the "popular" people, particularly the girls. They all had this image to keep up, and most everyone else didn't. I remember getting compliments from a lot of the girls about the outfits I wore, saying "I wish I could dress like that". It wasn't because they didn't have the money--I bought most of my clothes from thrift stores--it was because they didn't have the courage to stand out and break away from the pack mentality. I would hear rumors of abusive relationships, immense pressure to have sex/get drunk/etc. None of that stuff ever touched me.
quankanne Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 high school was the root cause of my self-esteem issues. The bane of my existence. I still can hardly speak of it in a favorable way the older I get – and the more of my friends that I talk to from back then – I'm starting to think it's everyone's private hell, to some degree. Drum major and classmate said she was miserable because she got labelled a tramp by upperclassmen when a fellow classmate kissed her, then lied to his girlfriend about it it ("SHE kissed ME, honest ..." kind of thing). Which I never even knew, because this was one chick who really seemed to have it together. Another girl, the head cheerleader our senior year and very, very quiet otherwise, was miserable because of the racism that exists even today in our hometown. Some of the more popular kids moved back (or stayed behind) to raise families there because it was such a wonderful place (barf) ... until I moved from home and transferred to a university my junior year, I was miserable because of the misfit label – too "white" to be a Mexican, too "mexican" to fit in with the gringos and most people couldn't figure out my family (Air Force, so they moved around a lot before I was born) because they were "different." Combine that with being an overweight band geek, and you've got a minor level of hell working :laugh: I'm guessing this a huge reason why I never really bought into the popularity contests, of voting for Mr & Mrs -- High School or prom queen or Best Looking or even homecoming court. It was all just a bunch of hokey BS in my way of thinking, and just another means of conforming. a boy like Frisky would have been my idea of heaven back then, because he thumbed his nose at tradition ...
Star Gazer Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 I graduated 14 years ago. (My G-d, I'm old!!) The members of our Homecoming Court were a mixed bag. The guys were the hottest and most talented football players (my high school was a BIG football school, the athletes were like celebrities) and the girls were basically the top students, athletes and do-gooders (but honestly weren't that attractive). It was an honor at my high school, not a popularity contest at all.
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