Disasterpiece Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 I was with my gf for 1 year and 3 months. We had a great relationship but in the last few months things started going a little bad. We were long distance but that never stopped us from planning for the future and we had actually wanted to get married and have kids. In the last months it was harder because we couldnt see eachother regularly the little problems we had would mount and when we would see eachother we would spend half the time "fighting" to try and fix them. We didnt scream at eachother just tried to reason through problems. Well a week before she broke up with me she admitted that she had feelings for some other guy, but never told me until we were broken up for 4 days at which point she had taken him to disneyland along with her 11 year old daughter. That hurt a lot too because disney was our place we had gone to many times, and for her to just introduce this new guy to her daughter right off the bat, was a huge slap in the face. I had to find out for myself that he was there with her and that they were together. When i called and asked if she was having a good time, She said yes and that Eric, the other guy decided to come along too. I was furious and after texting back and forth i said "well im glad its easier for you now that you have your new bf" then she admitted that she in fact was with this guy and that it "just happened" He is recently divorced, not more than 2 months, has two kids and his ex wife knows who she is and hates her. I am close with her family and they all agree it was a ****ty thing for her to do that and her sister says it will never last and says her dad thinks its only a matter of time before she sends his ass packing but both her mom and dad say according to her sister that they are disgusted with her and dont understand her. She said that she still loves me but I just dont know what to do. Ive gone no contact for about a week now. Wll she realize what she did and come back ?
Capital P Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 Probably. After about 12 months once the new guy ****s up. And that is only if you get on with your life and dont contact her AT ALL. U need to decide if you want her back. If you NC them immediately they will always float around because of their ego. Dont give her the satisfaction of argueing, pleading, begging or even answering her call.
Chance_taker Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 Man sorry you're going through this. She may come back after some time but it won't happen unless you try and move on with your life and just drop off the face of the earth to her. You have a decent bit of history and thats hard to move on from so know you will still be on her mind regardless if she wants to be with you now or not. I can almost guarantee she will be comparing everything this guy does to you and the grass may not be so green for her afterall. It seems to me that she must have been talking to this other guy for longer than she is admitting because she most likely wouldn't break it off unless she was sure that she had someone to fall back on. So ask yourself if she did this to you would you truly want to put your life on hold for her with hopes that she comes back? Even more would you ever be able to trust your heart to this girl again after what she did?
strength-abounds Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 Go NC, find a woman you can see in person and move on.
USMCHokie Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 That hurt a lot too because disney was our place we had gone to many times, and for her to just introduce this new guy to her daughter right off the bat, was a huge slap in the face. It's probably not the first time he's met her daughter... She said that she still loves me... This doesn't mean sh*t. ...she admitted that she in fact was with this guy and that it "just happened"... Actions are all that matter. Wll she realize what she did and come back ? This is so unbelievably irrelevant. Perma-LAUNCH.
LovelyDaze Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 It doesn't matter if she DOES come back. I was dumped 1 year ago this month and it was only when I went NC completely- was when I started getting over my ex or giving a flying f*** what he was up to. I can proudly say I forgot his cell number and many memories have faded. Think about it, when a dumper erases you from their life, you must erase them from yours. And NO, you may not wish her happy birthday, merry christmas, or even call to say hi to her child. It's over. I have been back in the dating game for months and even had a mini-relationship with one guy for about 3 months. I feel like life has so much promise for me now! I enjoyed spending time getting to know new guys even though it didn't turn permanent. Who cares?! I'm having a blast! I come back to LS to see "where I come from" and where I am now. Yes, it's a tough road and YES you deserve true love. She wasn't it, isn't it, and will never BE it. Go NC, take a break before dating and then when you feel ready, get back out there. Your REAL love is out there....waiting.........
Mimolicious Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 From the sounds of it, your xGF may be the cause of why this other guy is now divorced. Will she come back? Who knows... I don't have a crystal ball but one thing that is crystal clear here is that your xGF has little regards for you. Her telling you that she loves you, she probably does but maybe like a friend or she is telling you this to keep the door open. Her coming back shouldn't be a question. Why would you want to take back someone who made you an alternate? How convenient for her to go and experiment with another dude, go on vaca, introduce him to her daughter and then if it all fails, she comes back to you... are you a lay-a-way plan? Grow a backbone, move on and leave her sorry ass in the past. Trust me, I have been through this... it's never better.
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