juand Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 Hi everyone, My gf broke up with me about a month ago. During this whole time she has not contacted me once, i have texted her like four times during that period. After not talking to her for like a week, I saw her at a bar. As soon as she saw me she disappeared. I texted her saying "u cant say hi, r we enemies now?" all she said was "u hate me". After all of this we were able to talk "she was drunk" As soon as she saw me again she started crying alot. She didnt want me to talk about the relationship so all i said was to think about things and not to lose each other. at the end she gave me a hug and a kiss by the lips. The next day i called her and she said she doesnt want a relationship or date, that she doesnt know what she wants. She then went on to say that she misses me and misses watching shows we used to watch together and that xmas is going to be hard. Ever since that day i have not contacted her. i told her it sucked i felt so much for her and she didnt feel anything for me. She said thats not true. My last words were I care alot for u and im just going to leave ur life like u want me to. Ever since then I have not called or antyhing. Now im dying to talk to her. Should i just let it go, move on... or is she just confused, give her sometime a cpl of weeks and then contact her.. is it too late to go NC, after i looked for her for almost three weeks. please any suggestions as to how she might be feeling....
Ajax Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 Hi everyone, My gf broke up with me about a month ago. During this whole time she has not contacted me once, i have texted her like four times during that period. After not talking to her for like a week, I saw her at a bar. As soon as she saw me she disappeared. I texted her saying "u cant say hi, r we enemies now?" all she said was "u hate me". After all of this we were able to talk "she was drunk" As soon as she saw me again she started crying alot. She didnt want me to talk about the relationship so all i said was to think about things and not to lose each other. at the end she gave me a hug and a kiss by the lips. The next day i called her and she said she doesnt want a relationship or date, that she doesnt know what she wants. She then went on to say that she misses me and misses watching shows we used to watch together and that xmas is going to be hard. Ever since that day i have not contacted her. i told her it sucked i felt so much for her and she didnt feel anything for me. She said thats not true. My last words were I care alot for u and im just going to leave ur life like u want me to. Ever since then I have not called or antyhing. Now im dying to talk to her. Should i just let it go, move on... or is she just confused, give her sometime a cpl of weeks and then contact her.. is it too late to go NC, after i looked for her for almost three weeks. please any suggestions as to how she might be feeling.... It's amazing how often this sort of thing happens to people. It seems that women especially get "confused" and don't know what they want. But it boils down to the fact that she knows enough that she doesn't want to be with you. I struggle with wondering if my ex still cares too. We've been broken up for 9 weeks and have been in NC for 7. It's aweful to be so close to someone and then be cut out like that. I sympathize. There's really no way to know what she's feeling, and it seems she's not sharing. The only thing you can do at this point is try to move on.
Author juand Posted October 26, 2010 Author Posted October 26, 2010 yeah, that is def. what i am trying to do right now. Its very hard to tho. i have been doing better but i do break down at times. I thank u for your quick response. it holds me back from texting and looking for her. Its hard to believe that u were with someone for so long and all of a sudden they are gone like u never existed in their lives. I was def. confused after i saw her at the bar, she was really nice then and seemed to be sad about the situation. But its moving on time, and NC is what i gotta go for. In 3 years i have never gone for a whole week without talking to this girl.. hardest thing ever. thank ajax tho...
bl22 Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 Hey Juand going through very much the same thing right now. From what I gather women tend to get 'confused' when there is someone else confusing her. I.e another guy or friends making out she'd be happier single. Trying my best to get over her but like you said, its just crazy to be so close to someone then just nothing. We were our own team and as soon as she got new friends she left me, most painful experience I've ever lived through.
Author juand Posted October 26, 2010 Author Posted October 26, 2010 hey Bl22, it is very hard, and it is definately true about the friends part or someone else confusing them. Its just so hard to understand, i am completely lost wether to give up on her or not. Last time i spoke to her she said, "i dont want a relationship, i dont want to date" those were not her thoughts a week before we broke up. unbelievable the way someone can change their feelings so quick. I want to contact her really bad, but there is nothing else for me to say, other than i apologize for making her suffer. even though im sure i treated her very well.
Ajax Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 hey Bl22, it is very hard, and it is definately true about the friends part or someone else confusing them. Its just so hard to understand, i am completely lost wether to give up on her or not. Last time i spoke to her she said, "i dont want a relationship, i dont want to date" those were not her thoughts a week before we broke up. unbelievable the way someone can change their feelings so quick. I want to contact her really bad, but there is nothing else for me to say, other than i apologize for making her suffer. even though im sure i treated her very well. Yup. That's the way it goes. A week before my ex left me she started a very serious conversation in which she told me how much she loved me and how happy she was to be with me. She was talking about our future together and I thought we had taken the relationship to a new level. Then five days later she said that she needed to "figure herself out," and to do that she needed to be alone. It was like she had led me up a mountain and then pushed me off a cliff. I still love her but have no hope that she'll ever come back. I don't know what happened to her to make her decide to quit. I gave her love, affection, and made her feel special. Unfortunately it wasn't enough. I assume that when she's ready to be in a relationship again she'll just move on with someone else. As much as you love her and want her back, I think you need to let go. It's not easy and it takes time, but in the end you'll be better for it. Keep in mind, there's nothing you can do to bring her back. If she comes back she has to come back on her own, and you moving on won't stop that if she decides to do that.
bl22 Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 hey Bl22, it is very hard, and it is definately true about the friends part or someone else confusing them. Its just so hard to understand, i am completely lost wether to give up on her or not. Last time i spoke to her she said, "i dont want a relationship, i dont want to date" those were not her thoughts a week before we broke up. unbelievable the way someone can change their feelings so quick. I want to contact her really bad, but there is nothing else for me to say, other than i apologize for making her suffer. even though im sure i treated her very well. I know exactly how you feel, a week before she told me 'she has feelings for someone else and we cant be together anymore', she told me I was the love of her life and will never ever let me go? The txts I had on my phone from the end of september were all happy 'I miss yous' etc, 5/6 days later they were 'i dont know how i feel anymore i need space' In my opinion your sitaution sounds pretty much the same as mine, it might be hard to hear but I think there is definately someone else involved. Don't beat yourself up, as long as you didnt abuse her or cheat on her. All you got to do is work on yourself now, be the best possible you that you can be. That's what my aim is now
thatsonlyme Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 Same story here. Few weeks before breakup we were discussing buying a condo. few months before we started our business together. Then she met this guy and two weeks later she left me! She was cold as ice first month or so, now she's showing some feelings, but she's not offering reconciliation. actually she's moving to LA, so all hopes are gone. I'm under impression that even if they still care about you and regret their decisions, most of the time dumpers will not try to reconcile. Maybe it's just their ego or fear of rejection, I don't know. I know that my ex is not euphoric about her new guy anymore, they started having issues and I can see in her eyes that she started missing me. I know she will stick with her decision though and there is no more hope for us. It sucks because all that "I'm not in love anymore" crap was obviously BS. She just fell in love with someone else and to her credit, didn't wanna cheat on me. We could have made it
skydiveaddict Posted October 27, 2010 Posted October 27, 2010 Hi everyone, i told her it sucked i felt so much for her and she didnt feel anything for me. She said thats not true. My last words were I care alot for u and im just going to leave ur life like u want me to. Ever since then I have not called or antyhing. Now im dying to talk to her. You're just getting the standard female line, in a round-about way. Here's ALL you need to know: if she wanted to be with you, she would be. All the rest is nonsense. DO NOT contact her, unless you're a fan of bitter emotional pain.
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