melissa123 Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 Hi all Two quick things ... Ive got myself in a tricky situation where im madly in love with this guy who I reeeally wish I wasn't. Its making me really really depressed and I guess I need someone to knock some sense into me!! Basically we've been getting quite close but he has a history of being a bit of a player. There is this other girl that chases him but he tell me he loves me and she is annoying and he cant stand her etc. We spent the past Saturday getting really close, lots of hugs and I love yous. I was so happy!! Anyway txt him later that night but no reply (found of later he was drunk and out of it) but 'annoying girl' invited herself over to his house and he let her sleep in his bed then took her out for breakfast the next morning. His nick name at work is 'manslut' (not nice but its what everyone calls him and he laughs about it). So when I found out about him being with this girl I tried to hide my hurt joked and that he was a bit of a man slut. His reply 'whats it to you'. Anyway the next day at work I tried to hide my massive hurt but I probably suck at it. He wouldnt talk to me or even look at me so I asked what was up and he said he was so mad at me for calling him a 'manslut'. He said he never wants to see me again. He said he was not looking forward to seeing me at all and wants nothing to do with me. I even apologised to him and said basically im sorry for calling him that and I was just having a we joke. That day ATLEASTr five other staff members also called him a manslut while I was standing right there and he had a massive laugh and joke with them about it. What is with this??? Im so hurt!! I really liked him and Im hurt he was with this girl but even more hurt that he wont talk to me and is furious at me for some silly joke. Can you please just knock some sense into me. Im honestly really upset and feel like ive done wrong!! I dont understand the situation at all!!!! Help!!
welikeincrowds Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 So, he says he loves you. Are you guys in a committed relationship? If so, why is this girl spending the night? If not, why are you guys talking about love? Did he say/did you ask why he was mad? I mean obviously from your story it sounds like he's being a baby, or perhaps he knows he's been bad and is taking it out on you. But none of this makes sense to me. I feel like I'm missing a lot of the story.
Author melissa123 Posted October 26, 2010 Author Posted October 26, 2010 Thankyou so much for your reply and so sorry for the confusion! No we are not in an official relationship but I (probably stupidly) thought is was heading that way. He tells me he loves me and has fallen for me etc so I guess that why I thought it. So I guess I have no say over he spends the night with but It was just a big blow after he told me she was annoying and he wanted to be with me .... He was barely speaking to me and at work the next day and wouldnt even look at me so I just asked why he was angry and he said all those things. And yes I would kinda understand if I had outright called him a manhoe but its his nickname and EVERYONE calls him that!!! Other people were calling him that infront of me and he was laughing with them!!! Im really confused and also really hurt! What do you make of this?
that girl Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 A guy who is in love with you wouldn't be spending the night with another girl. He is playing you and you are so lovesick and dumb that you don't realize it.
Author melissa123 Posted October 26, 2010 Author Posted October 26, 2010 Thanks that girl. Yes im not experienced with this kind of guy so got very confused I spoke him a little bit the next day (as much as he would speak to me) and he said she just turned up and he was so drunk that he didnt realise she was in his bed until morning. Thats where I got confused!! Would you have any ideas why he is so dam angry at me tho?!
that girl Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 I spoke him a little bit the next day (as much as he would speak to me) and he said she just turned up and he was so drunk that he didnt realise she was in his bed until morning. Thats where I got confused!! He's lying to you and he's mad because he thinks you might be catching on. Run away.
Author melissa123 Posted October 26, 2010 Author Posted October 26, 2010 Ok thankyou I know it is probably a no brainer post for most people but im prety inecperienced with this kinda guy. thanks for you understanding
Trimmer Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 He's lying to you and he's mad because he thinks you might be catching on. Run away. Agreed. Both with his anger and his indifferent behavior toward you, he has you confused and wondering what you have done wrong, which diverts your energy and focus away from a rational analysis of his behavior.
mitchell Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 Run away from someone nicknamed "manslut". This bodes very poorly for his character.
lso802 Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 Just an annoying girl? Yet, he lets her sleep over. She better be the boss' daughter or something. You'll find a better dude. Ditch this one.
Feelin Frisky Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 When people are guilty of betraying someone it's not unusual for them to try to reverse the guilt off of them and on to the victim (in this case, you). He cheats, then tries to make your hurt the outrage. People who do this even come to believe their own lies and blame you for not beleveing them too. This happens a lot in drug, alcohol and gambling addictions. People swear up and down that they'll never have another episode and when they do, they actually fault their SOs for doubting them even though they are guilty. Sorry if this is what you're facing.
ascendotum Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 A guy who is in love with you wouldn't be spending the night with another girl. He is playing you and you are so lovesick and dumb that you don't realize it. This quote is a little harsh in wording, but it and Frisky's post explain it all in my opinion. He's nicely spun it back on you and got YOU to apologize, when he was the one who slept with someone else after telling you he loved you. Don't feel hurt nor depressed, feel mad. " He wouldnt talk to me or even look at me"....now you do this.
BackUpOrGetStung Posted October 26, 2010 Posted October 26, 2010 I have a nickname at work, it's "Smash". It's a stupid name, I know, but it comes from the fact that pretty much, daily, one or two of the 7 girls in my office that I've "smashed", will come down to our dept. for something. I also talk to my work buddies about potential prospects and outside of the office hookups. My point is, he spends 8 hours a day with these people and they probably know him better than you do, he's got a nickname for a reason..
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