nickelinadime Posted October 23, 2010 Posted October 23, 2010 I hope this helps me feel a little bit better, I'm pretty confused at the moment. I met this girl over a year ago and we got along well from day one. It was only a week-long camp so we didn't really hit it off that much but she got in contact with me after and we started talking every single day. We tried the long distance thing out for a while and even got to see eachother for a weekend, where we really hit it off. We talked about trying to make it last until we could go to school together, but we decided not to. Now, fast forward a year later and shes going to the university in my city. We both are competitive athletes in the same sport, which is how we met. I see her a few times a week and we text non-stop all day. Its been a month since we first met up and its clear that were both interested in eachother. The topic of dating has come up a few times and I always hear the same thing, "you're a great guy, but I'm not sure what I want" or "I like you, but I don't think I'm ready for a relationship yet". Unfortunately, I got a bombshell dropped on me a few weeks ago. She told me that her boyfriend cheated on her right before she came to school and that she doesnt trust guys very much right now. I've been playing the patient card, but dating came up again last night and thats what has kind of been bothering me. Initially, she had said that she wasnt a very good girl to be getting into a relationship with, but later apologized and asked me what I was looking for. She's asked me what I'm looking for a few times and some of my friends are telling me I should just open up to her and hope that everything works out. I'm kind of worried since I have to see her weekly anyways that I might make things kind of weird. Should I give in and tell her that I like her and want to try seeing eachother?
Teknoe Posted October 23, 2010 Posted October 23, 2010 The topic of dating has come up a few times and I always hear the same thing, "you're a great guy, but I'm not sure what I want" or "I like you, but I don't think I'm ready for a relationship yet". Unfortunately, I got a bombshell dropped on me a few weeks ago. She told me that her boyfriend cheated on her right before she came to school and that she doesnt trust guys very much right now. I've been playing the patient card, but dating came up again last night and thats what has kind of been bothering me. Initially, she had said that she wasnt a very good girl to be getting into a relationship with, but later apologized and asked me what I was looking for. She's asked me what I'm looking for a few times and some of my friends are telling me I should just open up to her and hope that everything works out. I'm kind of worried since I have to see her weekly anyways that I might make things kind of weird. Should I give in and tell her that I like her and want to try seeing eachother? Been there, done that, DOING THAT (sorta). I know the pain, bro. You basically got two choices here: 1). Open up to her, as your friends suggested, and hope/pray for the best. However, in my experience, and I've learned this the HARD WAY believe you me, when a girl doesn't like a guy enough to SHOW him that interest, she likely won't ever get with him. This ain't Hollywood. Ain't the movies. Ain't "She's Out of My League" or "I Love You, Beth Cooper." If a girl likes likes you, nothing will stop her from (wanting to) be with you. 2). Do the wiser thing and step back a little bit. She's NOT READY TO DATE. Doesn't know what she wants. Just got cheated on. Don't make it any harder on her or yourself. I know it's already hard bro. But the deeper you get in it, the more it'll hurt. I know your heart says if you open up, she will too and you guys will go on to be a couple trust me I been there. But reality is, 95 to 97% of the time, in cases like this, she just sees you as a good friend and wants to let you down gently so she can keep your friendship. It's your call. I respect ya if you do or don't. Even if it's a low percentage, sometimes it's good to go for it all so to speak, and learn. Each experience builds our character for next time around. I wish you the best.
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