surferscreed Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 Ok so about a month and a bit ago i started going out with my girlfriend at first it was amazing making out all the time, talking to each other till late online and we always hung out with each other at school as well with her friends. We even went through some problems with my best friend crossing the line and trying to touch her inappropriately but we made it through. But now the past few weeks we havnt made out for a while, and reduced to just small pecks on the lips and by the way she was acting slighty different, and it felt like she was losing interest in me, i even got a mutual friend to ask her if she was losing interest and my girlfriend said that she still liked me and was not losing interest. However this past week i couldnt take it anymore and decided to talk to her about how i felt and wondered if she still felt the same, she said that she still liked me and the reason she was acting this way was when she is going through a rough patch in her life (she had a rough childhood kinda like me) she pushes people close to her away. Then the next day it started getting awkward like we stopped kissing completely and started hanging out a bit less. I asked one of her friends what was wrong and he said dont be so needy and clingy and to stop always touching her while talking to her (but this guy is not a reliable source) nevertheless i took him on his advice and stayed away from her for two days. I asked a friend of mine that was her best guy friend and he said he didnt really know and would try to find out for me, he did and he said that my girlfriend said that it felt awkward with me and she didnt know why. So now i need help how do i get rid of the awkwardness and go back to when we use to be amazingly close?
Leigh 87 Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 Unfotunately, you cannot just come up with a solution to " make it stop". There is now ay to just change the akwardness. What you can do, and the best thing you can do in thsi situation, is to just be yourself. You are the person you want her to desire, and if you just put yourself out there, and just be yourself, then she will either want you, or not. Basically, you cannot just fix awkward ness, and actually, trying to FIX akwardness makes it WORSE; rather, try to just accept how things are, know that it sucks, but still try to be yoruself in her presence, and try to " see the awkwardness out". So this bad feeling will not magically dissapear, however, if you just wait it out, and accept that things feel bad, things WILl come good if you simlly be yourself; if things do not work out if you are fully being yourself around her, than things are not meant to work out. I feel for you though, it sucks wen things go from being all "great", to awkward.
Surrealist Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 I get the same impression that your friend advised that you may be smothering her a little too much, she might need some room to breathe. Also she may well be going through the rough patch and may feel like she needs some space. Don't smother her but maybe just let her know that you feel the awkwardness and tell her that you understand she may need some space for a while and that you are happy to give her that, and maybe reassure her and let her know you're there for her.
youngskywalker Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 If she's not giving you the vibes that she wants to be kissed and touched then by all means stop it. It doesn't mean that she not into you. Some girls can feel scared or untrusting because of things that happened in their past. And if she had a rough childhood then it's possible this is the case. Try to connect to her by showing you care. Talk to her, listen, be understanding. She might just open up and you'll soon find out why the change in behavior.
BackUpOrGetStung Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 (edited) Back way off of her and start doing things you like to do more. Don't call, don't email, don't text, don't write, don't stop at her locker, don't send a smoke signal, nothing. Wait for her to contact you and suggest hanging out...it may take a couple days, but she will. Edited October 22, 2010 by BackUpOrGetStung
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