melissa123 Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 Hey all Probably a silly post but I need a bit of advice. Basically (possibly unfortunately) ive fallen in love with a guy from my work. He moved to my country not long ago but lived with a good mate of mine overseas. She tells me he is one of the biggest players ever (ie sleeps around alot!!!!) He is 22 and not in a relationship so to a degree I understand and don't really judge. I myself am 21 and have never been one to sleep round. Ive only had sex with two guys and those guys ive been in long term relationships with. Ive never had a one night stand or just random sex, yet i dont judge those that do. Anyway I have fallen for this guy and he has invited me over once or twice before but ive been busy. If I can't come he will invite someone else over and sleep with them. He txts me a lot and says he loves me etc but then the next day he will txt and say he wouldnt waste his time on me cause I wont go over there to have sex. Since we've gotten close he has slept with a ton of girls :S Anyway my main question .... I don't shy away from sex or want to have it only with someone im in a relationship with but I do want to be the only one he is having sex with. Ie id sleep with him if it was just me he was sleeping with and not 20 other girls. Is this ok or am I being selfish?? He's starting to lose interest in me because I wont go over and spend time with him and he seems to think its not a big deal if he has others on the side (even if I am apparently his main interest) He even kinda blames it on me for not putting out. Should I stick to my morals or just be with him so I dont lose out and lose his interest?
Surrealist Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 Oh dear me. Okay Melissa, if you do not mind being one among many of his women who are sleeping with him, the go for it, provided you are comfortable with this situation. But please, do not fall for this guy's bull**** if you want exclusivity because it is very UNLIKELY he will compromise! In fact I am 100 per cent certain he won't. You are NOT being selfish at all, he is just playing the field and he does it because he can. Look I have a woman friend who is close to me who has run into people like this on numerous occasions only to get burnt. These guys tell their chicks ANYTHING, even hinting at marriage, to win over womens' trust, just to get laid, and I'm not exaggerating! This is a bad situation to get into if what you are seeking is exclusivity with this guy.
BackUpOrGetStung Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 I think you are being terribly selfish. If you want him to ever take you seriously, you need to go over and have sex with him. That's the only way he will respect you.
Ella whispers Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 If he loses interest you aren't losing anything. If you give him what he wants, you will lose a lot.
Lucky555 Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 Oh dear me. Okay Melissa, if you do not mind being one among many of his women who are sleeping with him, the go for it, provided you are comfortable with this situation. But please, do not fall for this guy's bull**** if you want exclusivity because it is very UNLIKELY he will compromise! In fact I am 100 per cent certain he won't. You are NOT being selfish at all, he is just playing the field and he does it because he can. Look I have a woman friend who is close to me who has run into people like this on numerous occasions only to get burnt. These guys tell their chicks ANYTHING, even hinting at marriage, to win over womens' trust, just to get laid, and I'm not exaggerating! This is a bad situation to get into if what you are seeking is exclusivity with this guy. This is the truth. Reread this over and over then ditch the guy. Your not in love..its just the rose colored glasses..im guilty of wearing them too. However, your going to get used and hurt so badly with this guy. Find a new guy fast..even if its online dating and have fun. I say your not in love because this guy doesn't love you and your allowing him to contact you. Delete his number or block it. RUN AS FAST as you can.
Author melissa123 Posted October 25, 2010 Author Posted October 25, 2010 Thanks guys, You were all so right That day at work he told me he loved me and kept hugging me and touching me etc. There was this other girl that had been chasing him but he said to me she was annoying and he couldnt care less for her. I went home all happy. Only to find out the next day he had taken the 'annoying' girl out that night, she stayed the night, then took her out for breakfast the next morning. It was a total stab in the heart
GooseChaser Posted October 25, 2010 Posted October 25, 2010 That guy is no good. Forget him, and find someone else that isn't so NEEDY and classless.
dreamingoftigers Posted October 25, 2010 Posted October 25, 2010 Be ever vigilant not to become attracted to this type of guy again, nothing but trouble.
utterer of lies Posted October 25, 2010 Posted October 25, 2010 I think you are being terribly selfish. If you want him to ever take you seriously, you need to go over and have sex with him. That's the only way he will respect you. I lol'd. Amazing.
Recommended Posts