Titles.

[Green]

That's really rude.

 

I meant it as a joke and not a rude one.

[Star Gazer]

yes, but in fairness you're very reasonable about it. It's like a part of you knows you're just getting ahead of yourself, but for that moment in time you can't help yourself. And you do recognize what you have a tendency to do, and are making an honest effort to move beyond it.

 

I think you're neato-bandito for being so open minded about your behaviors. Many are not that way at all.

 

+1,000,000.

[tigressA]

Aw, thanks ladies. :) I have actually received comments like that from other people, like "It's really cool how you can admit stuff like that so openly. I couldn't ever do that." I wonder how I've been able to do that despite having had a fear of criticism.

[Star Gazer]

Aw, thanks ladies. :) I have actually received comments like that from other people, like "It's really cool how you can admit stuff like that so openly. I couldn't ever do that." I wonder how I've been able to do that despite having had a fear of criticism.

 

I've received the same compliments.

 

Frankly, I think it's because we have come to learn just how much we grow and learn and become better people when we admit where we've gone wrong. That growth feels really, really good (particularly compared to the alternative), and you can't grow without open recognition of where you've misstepped to begin with.

[threebyfate]

tigress, I still have reservations about this guy but I sincerely hope I'm wrong. Your discussion with him was worthwhile in that it's actually put your relationship onto the next level. Prior to your discussion, there was no b/f and g/f status. Note how he's warning you that he takes it more seriously? Watch for more controlling behaviour.

[Star Gazer]

Note how he's warning you that he takes it more seriously? Watch for more controlling behaviour.

 

Oh c'mon. After she's worked it out and is happy with the result, you have to throw this out there?

 

Just because he takes something more seriously does not mean that he's controlling. Give me a break. If anything, the opposite is true. If he demanded they be BF/GF, THAT would be controlling.

[tigressA]

Very true, SG. It's kind of hard for me to believe how much I've grown since being with C. I thought the only right way to do it was completely alone. I was the one who ultimately decided to make the changes, but I wouldn't have really learned of where I most needed to grow and make changes until much later if it hadn't been for him. I don't need him or anyone else to point out where I've taken a stumble anymore, but it would've taken me much longer to know where to start if he hadn't been there. I'm very grateful to him for that.

[threebyfate]

Yes, I gave my honest opinion. But if that's not what you want to hear, then consider this to be my parting post in your threads.

 

I wish you luck and happiness, Tigress. That's a fact.

[Star Gazer]

Very true, SG. It's kind of hard for me to believe how much I've grown since being with C. I thought the only right way to do it was completely alone. I was the one who ultimately decided to make the changes, but I wouldn't have really learned of where I most needed to grow and make changes until much later if it hadn't been for him. I don't need him or anyone else to point out where I've taken a stumble anymore, but it would've taken me much longer to know where to start if he hadn't been there. I'm very grateful to him for that.

 

Some people really need to be (or rather, should be) alone to work through their own internal demons before entering a relationship. You're not one of those people. You just need...practice, of how to be the best partner you can be within a relationship.

 

To be perfectly honest, C sounds quote tolerant and patient with you. I'd give him a package of gold stars next time you see him, if I were you. (Kidding. ) Okay, maybe a couple extra blow jobs.

 

Just don't wear him down...

[tigressA]

TBF, I really appreciate your perspective and your good wishes, but your last post was just...kinda out there, IMO. I don't see how that behavior from him was controlling at all. We had both of our needs/viewpoints considered, acknowledged, taken care of.

[tigressA]

Some people really need to be (or rather, should be) alone to work through their own internal demons before entering a relationship. You're not one of those people. You just need...practice, of how to be the best partner you can be within a relationship.

 

To be perfectly honest, C sounds quote tolerant and patient with you. I'd give him a package of gold stars next time you see him, if I were you. (Kidding. ) Okay, maybe a couple extra blow jobs.

 

Just don't wear him down...

 

I agree. While I am open with the fact that I've taken a stumble or two, I still tend to downplay just how much drama I'm really responsible for--part of my destructive routine. It's like people here start thinking he's an ******* because of what I tell them, and it's like it's confirmed in my mind...for a moment I just want to go all Kill Bill on him and then I think, "Uh, WTF are you doing? Oh yeah. You're being ridiculous."

[Star Gazer]

I agree. While I am open with the fact that I've taken a stumble or two, I still tend to downplay just how much drama I'm really responsible for--part of my destructive routine. It's like people here start thinking he's an ******* because of what I tell them, and it's like it's confirmed in my mind...for a moment I just want to go all Kill Bill on him and then I think, "Uh, WTF are you doing? Oh yeah. You're being ridiculous."

 

Well, I was on to you. I knew you were responsible for the drama.

 

What you have to remember is that when you're going ape sh*t here, he's off in la-la land thinking sweet nothings about you. For now, anyway.

 

So quit it.

[tigressA]

Well, I was on to you. I knew you were responsible for the drama.

 

What you have to remember is that when you're going ape sh*t here, he's off in la-la land thinking sweet nothings about you. For now, anyway.

 

So quit it.

 

I do have to remember that...I actually didn't even consider that at all, before. But it makes total sense now, because so much of the time whenever I brought stuff up his reaction was best summed up like "W(hat)TF is this and W(here)TF did it come from??" :laugh:

 

Honest confusion, and I would always interpret it as being sooo impatient with me, he wasn't listening to me, blah blah...I didn't even consider the idea that he didn't think there was anything wrong at all.