ame1047 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Well, after 5 months apart, my ex fiancee and I are trying to work things out. Problem is, my family is livid! They think that I am crazy to take him back, and to try to work on this. I know that they are concerned that I am goign to get hurt again, but they are really taking it to an extreme. They are so important to me, and I am not sure that I can choose between them and him. I love him very much and I really want to work on things, however, I can't have my family be disappointed in me for trying. Any suggestions are appreciated. I am not sure how to help my family understand, and forgive him for breaking up with me those months ago. This is even harder than the break up I think. At least then, I had their support, now I have none of it. I appreciate that they are concerned and care about me getting hurt again, but I wouldn't put my neck out there again if it wasn't worth the risk to me and to him. I have faith that we are together again through God, and I am really hoping that He can bring my family around as well. Hardest part is my family all lives in different states, so I can just go over to their house and talk to them, this is all via phone and text conversations. Help!!! I can't lose my love or my family!
Billie The Puppet Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Well, after 5 months apart, my ex fiancee and I are trying to work things out. Problem is, my family is livid! They think that I am crazy to take him back, and to try to work on this. I know that they are concerned that I am goign to get hurt again, but they are really taking it to an extreme. They are so important to me, and I am not sure that I can choose between them and him. I love him very much and I really want to work on things, however, I can't have my family be disappointed in me for trying. Any suggestions are appreciated. I am not sure how to help my family understand, and forgive him for breaking up with me those months ago. This is even harder than the break up I think. At least then, I had their support, now I have none of it. I appreciate that they are concerned and care about me getting hurt again, but I wouldn't put my neck out there again if it wasn't worth the risk to me and to him. I have faith that we are together again through God, and I am really hoping that He can bring my family around as well. Hardest part is my family all lives in different states, so I can just go over to their house and talk to them, this is all via phone and text conversations. Help!!! I can't lose my love or my family! Members of my family are the same way, just like we can't help our feelings neither can they, However I do think family should swallow their pride and thought's and allow us to do what our minds and hearts please, make our own mistakes etc. Difference is I was pining when they told me all of their true feelings going on what if's, My ex isn't coming back she found another man so I don't have to worry about this anymore. It will be hard but hopefully your family sees through this and allows you to be happy.
Stephie Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 SO I have followed your posts because they are exactly like what happened to me 6 months ago almost to a T. I read this one and thought wow, so my family would be the exact same way I don't think they would ever except him again. But they are your family and no matter what they will have to live with your decesion, I don't think they will cut you off because they are your family and they love you. There's things my family does that I don't agree with, but that doesn't mean I don't love them. It's your life and in your heart if you truly believe in you 2 then your family will have to too. Your lucky so don't let it go, if you start stressing and pulling away because of your family you 2 might not make it. Follow your heart, you wont loose your family they will always be there. Hey so how did ya'll start to finally work things out? My ex fiance is so pridefull I don't think he would ever admit to being wrong about leaving?
Author ame1047 Posted October 28, 2010 Author Posted October 28, 2010 SO I have followed your posts because they are exactly like what happened to me 6 months ago almost to a T. I read this one and thought wow, so my family would be the exact same way I don't think they would ever except him again. But they are your family and no matter what they will have to live with your decesion, I don't think they will cut you off because they are your family and they love you. There's things my family does that I don't agree with, but that doesn't mean I don't love them. It's your life and in your heart if you truly believe in you 2 then your family will have to too. Your lucky so don't let it go, if you start stressing and pulling away because of your family you 2 might not make it. Follow your heart, you wont loose your family they will always be there. Hey so how did ya'll start to finally work things out? My ex fiance is so pridefull I don't think he would ever admit to being wrong about leaving? Well, Steph, I went my own way. I lived my life for me. Focused on my work, school, classese that I wanted to take for me (dance, yoga, tai chi, etc). I figured whether or not we got back together, I needed to make myself happy. It just so happened that he still had some of my stuff, and I found some of his stuff mixed in with my moving boxes. So five months after our break, he came to my house to exchange our things. The next day, he called me and told me that it is too hard, that he was trying to fill his life with other people (women) and realized when he saw me that none of them will fill his life like I did. So, we decided that we still cared a lot about eachother and that we wanted to create our relationship again, with God involved this time, because that is something that we both focused on a lot after the break up, our Christianity. So now we go to church and explore our religion together along with having fun and doing things that we like to do. As for my family. I hope that they come around, I really do. His family is very happy that we are together (however, it will take me a long time to forgive them for some of the things that they said to me after the break up) but my family just cannot accept it. Problem is, my sister is kind of a ring leader, she thinks of everything as a business transaction, not how it feels or what it is like on the inside. It will take them a long time if indeed this does work, but all I can do is pray and hope for the best. My best wishes to you Steph... take care of yourself, be yourself, and find your inner happiness, the rest will fall into place as it should be. Even though I wanted him back, I was okay with being alone... try it, it is very refreshing and confidence boosting!
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