mridul_chajilee Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Hello guys,who is the main calprit in breakup?means boys or girls?who first do this in most cases? i want to say these are girls who break first.And you?
kaycstamper Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 It's been my experience that the guys either treat you so bad you want out or they break up with you. Maybe they don't know what they want.
Arabella Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Agreed with above poster. Every time (except one) that I've broken up with someone, it was because I couldn't take their crappy behavior toward me anymore. Arabella
Tincup Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 Just for my curiosity, did their bad behavior toward you change over time, or did your expectation of how they should treat you change? The reason I ask is my girlfriend broke up with me a month ago because of how I treat her. I treat her very well, and I have been consistent in how I treat her. But her expectation of how I "should" treat her changed. Basically I did not turn into what she "thought" I should. So back to my question: Did the guys "bad" behavior toward to change over time, or was he always like he is?
Arabella Posted October 24, 2010 Posted October 24, 2010 Oh, no... in my case with my last ex, he used to treated me very well in the beginning and after he realized I was totally in love with him, that quickly changed. He became disrespectful, dismissive, inconsiderate and eventually downright abusive and toxic. I had to cut him out of my life entirely, no matter how much I loved the guy. Arabella
reknown29 Posted October 24, 2010 Posted October 24, 2010 it seems like women these days are quick to go. its easier for a woman to find someone than a man. especially n attractive one. if you distance yourself even a little a majority of women take it as disrepectful and as being mean towards them. it is normal to need a little distance in a relationship. especially when one realizes how much the other one loves them. you need to check in on yourself. Im not saying this was the case with any of the above posts, but in my case, I just needed a small amount of space and I was a little less responsive than usual. she left without trying to talk it out. It could have easily been talked out, I would have done anything for this girl. she now says it was an awful experience to be with me because I was so distant. ...while we were together all I got all day long was "your a beautiful man" sweet man" ...etc. etc. I sent her 30 texts a day and spent every moment with her. ...turns out there is another man. if she would just admit that it would be easier on my healing but unfortunately, its not about me, at all...
Arabella Posted October 25, 2010 Posted October 25, 2010 (edited) I agree actually, that a lot of girls, expect their man to shower them with attention at all hours of the night and day and if this expectation isn't met, they don't feel valued and leave. However that was hardly the case for me. He cheated with his ex, lied constantly, disappeared without notice, constantly put me down, and all of this got much worse over time. He suffered from several mental illnesses and abused his drugs too. I put up with it for a year and a half before I couldn't take it anymore. I still have a deep, caring love for him and I hope he finds happiness & stability... but I don't want him anywhere near me. A woman who truly loves her man will have a great deal of patience and always try to work things out. When she gives up... it's because she truly sees no hope left and its come down to a matter of self-preservation. Arabella Edited October 25, 2010 by Arabella spelling
coltsfan1 Posted October 25, 2010 Posted October 25, 2010 in my experience the girls have been the ones to leave, my ex left due to the fact that I didn't treat her like our other friends husband treated their wifes and I didn't due to the fact that she didn't behave like the other males wifes.. But i believe that EVERY situation is different!!
Capthxc Posted October 25, 2010 Posted October 25, 2010 Every girl ive dated has broken up with me, and i wouldnt say i really treated them "bad." I never lied or cheated. Most of them were just random flings that went no where. The first serious relationship the girlfriend cheated on me multiple times and when i confronted her about it she broke up with me. These issues carried on to the next ex, and made me very paranoid. So in return i was over protective. I fell in love too fast and questioned her every move. Didn't help that we were LDR towards the end of the relationship. I started to push myself away without even realizing it, and then she reached the point of not being able to take it anymore and dropped me. Kind of unfair if you ask me. I had to wait 4 months for her to move out and completely break things off with her ex while we were seeing each other. She couldnt even give me one month to get my emotions in order. So i agree with what others have said here. The second you start to distance or push away even a little bit, they start feel like they need to move on.
Author mridul_chajilee Posted October 25, 2010 Author Posted October 25, 2010 Thanking you all for your valuable replies.
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