Titania22 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 o.O And I actually agree with you. But there is a vast difference between someone who uses these qualities to be protective and in-charge vs. someone who's being abrasive or an abuser. An important distinction.
Green Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Show me a REAL BAD ASS of a man and I'll show you a guy who has no trouble getting woman. I think you need to just be who you are though. If you are not a bad boy then don't try to be one just to get girls to like you. But if you happen to enjoy being the leader of a biker gang then rock on because you will have no shortage of women.
Titania22 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Show me a REAL BAD ASS of a man and I'll show you a guy who has no trouble getting woman. I don't disagree, but what gets me is that yes, if you are unfussed about which girls you are attacting this will work. But as a girl, I struggle with the problem of how to stop attracting guys I am not interested in and start attracting guys I am interested in. I opened up this last month and put myself out into the world reasoning that if I could endure the unwanted interest without running and hiding eventually some of the wanted interest would come my way. This seems false, and it didn't do anything to make me feel good about myself. So yes there are plenty of tried and true ways for both sexes to attract just anyone of the opposite sex, but I am still baffled as to how to find, let alone attract a specific type of man. Does anyone have any advice?
Green Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 I don't disagree, but what gets me is that yes, if you are unfussed about which girls you are attacting this will work. But as a girl, I struggle with the problem of how to stop attracting guys I am not interested in and start attracting guys I am interested in. I opened up this last month and put myself out into the world reasoning that if I could endure the unwanted interest without running and hiding eventually some of the wanted interest would come my way. This seems false, and it didn't do anything to make me feel good about myself. So yes there are plenty of tried and true ways for both sexes to attract just anyone of the opposite sex, but I am still baffled as to how to find, let alone attract a specific type of man. Does anyone have any advice? See the entire problem with this "women like bad boy love :)" statement it its USELESS. It's like saying "women like tall men" you are who you are. It's best to just be yourself when you are dating. And in fact being a bad boy almost by definition means playing by your own rules instead of society rules which makes them more genuine. The best dating advice I could give to any one is BE YOURSELF. People are so afraid to show emotion, show SEXUALITY that they play a role. A castrated dumbed down version of themselves instead of the REAL THEM. Often done because they are AFRAID of getting hurt... afraid of REJECTION
SteveC80 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 o.O And I actually agree with you. But there is a vast difference between someone who uses these qualities to be protective and in-charge vs. someone who's being abrasive or an abuser. Its a thin line But in general women wantt o be lead around and told what to do and when to do it I learned the hard way when i was young,my girlfriend broke up with me because i was too nice in that i asked thme their opinions on what to do and where to go when they just wanted to be lead and told where were going and what were doing Women in a way want to look up at there man as the superior one in the relationship
Titania22 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 See the entire problem with this "women like bad boy love :)" statement it its USELESS. It's like saying "women like tall men" you are who you are. It's best to just be yourself when you are dating. And in fact being a bad boy almost by definition means playing by your own rules instead of society rules which makes them more genuine. The best dating advice I could give to any one is BE YOURSELF. People are so afraid to show emotion, show SEXUALITY that they play a role. A castrated dumbed down version of themselves instead of the REAL THEM. Often done because they are AFRAID of getting hurt... afraid of REJECTION Yes I hear you. My experience is that when I am feeling great and get out, I naturally am showing alot of sexuality, and I definately don't conform to society rules. I am not doing it to pick up, I am just being me, but you can see guys start swarming around me, until 1 makes contact. I would rather they all stay back and enjoy the view from a distance and when I see one I like, I will make it known (possibly non verbally). But I feel the assertive ones, just want to get there before some other guy does, and they don't give me a chance to build up my sexual energy. They just drain it, and I end up leaving the club to get away, because they don't take 'not interested' seriously. You see, if I saw a really attractive guy dancing at the club, I would be happy to enjoy the view for a bit, before even considering making a move. I have a feeling that a guy with a similar attitude, would be more appealing to me. So all that being said, being myself isn't working, because I need the swarm to take a hint. Sorry if this seemed whiney.
sartrelazyeye Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Its a thin line But in general women wantt o be lead around and told what to do and when to do it I learned the hard way when i was young,my girlfriend broke up with me because i was too nice in that i asked thme their opinions on what to do and where to go when they just wanted to be lead and told where were going and what were doing Women in a way want to look up at there man as the superior one in the relationship I don't really think that's true...maybe sexually (at least, for me).
Woggle Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 This is true about some women but not all. Women talk about how they don't want to be a man's mother but I don't want to be a woman's father either. The real irony is that the super independent strong types are the worst. I have known a few ballbusters that just find it irresistable when a man puts them in their place and gives back as good as he gets. There are some women though who grow up and seek out an equal relationship based on mutual love and respect. I encourage men to hold out for one of these types.
USMCHokie Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 There is a big difference between being a strong, assertive 'leader' and being a complete douche.
Knittress Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Yes I hear you. My experience is that when I am feeling great and get out, I naturally am showing alot of sexuality, and I definately don't conform to society rules. I am not doing it to pick up, I am just being me, but you can see guys start swarming around me, until 1 makes contact. I would rather they all stay back and enjoy the view from a distance and when I see one I like, I will make it known (possibly non verbally). But I feel the assertive ones, just want to get there before some other guy does, and they don't give me a chance to build up my sexual energy. They just drain it, and I end up leaving the club to get away, because they don't take 'not interested' seriously. You see, if I saw a really attractive guy dancing at the club, I would be happy to enjoy the view for a bit, before even considering making a move. I have a feeling that a guy with a similar attitude, would be more appealing to me. So all that being said, being myself isn't working, because I need the swarm to take a hint. Sorry if this seemed whiney. This is why I only go dancing at gay clubs. It's a shame really, since if the guys would be more gentle in their approach I wouldn't get scared off. (and i like to dance sexy) ::shrug:: But that's just the way it is when horny guys start throwing back booze. They're not there to get with YOU, they're there to find a woman and they gotta be efficient and to the point if they're going to find someone by the end of the night. It's a numbers game. Gay clubs. I'll see ya there.
Titania22 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 This is why I only go dancing at gay clubs. It's a shame really, since if the guys would be more gentle in their approach I wouldn't get scared off. (and i like to dance sexy) ::shrug:: But that's just the way it is when horny guys start throwing back booze. They're not there to get with YOU, they're there to find a woman and they gotta be efficient and to the point if they're going to find someone by the end of the night. It's a numbers game. Gay clubs. I'll see ya there. Thanks Knitress, it's nice just to have someone get it.
SteveC80 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 There is a big difference between being a strong, assertive 'leader' and being a complete douche. Sometimes to be an assertive leader you have to be a douche Most "alphas" in groups who all the women flock to allot of Men might call a "douche" but womens eggs are drawn to them
Knittress Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Thanks Knitress, it's nice just to have someone get it. It's my personal pet hate that it "doesn't count as sexual molestation if it's within 20 feet of a subwoofer and laser light show." If you walked up to someone on the street and just started rubbing your crotch on them you'd get the cops called on you! But oh well, that's club culture, and you can't re-make the world to fit you, right?
USMCHokie Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Sometimes to be an assertive leader you have to be a douche Most "alphas" in groups who all the women flock to allot of Men might call a "douche" but womens eggs are drawn to them And that brings me back to my first post in the thread. If you like being treated like dirt, then you are as good as dirt to me. So by all means, let those women be drawn to that. That's fine by me.
Knittress Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Sometimes to be an assertive leader you have to be a douche Most "alphas" in groups who all the women flock to allot of Men might call a "douche" but womens eggs are drawn to them See... what scares me is that you're mostly right, but then it gets all mangled up in bittersville. That thing you call "a fine line" really isn't.
Surrealist Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 I don't disagree, but what gets me is that yes, if you are unfussed about which girls you are attacting this will work. But as a girl, I struggle with the problem of how to stop attracting guys I am not interested in and start attracting guys I am interested in. I opened up this last month and put myself out into the world reasoning that if I could endure the unwanted interest without running and hiding eventually some of the wanted interest would come my way. This seems false, and it didn't do anything to make me feel good about myself. So yes there are plenty of tried and true ways for both sexes to attract just anyone of the opposite sex, but I am still baffled as to how to find, let alone attract a specific type of man. Does anyone have any advice? No advice, but what state do you live in?
Titania22 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 It's my personal pet hate that it "doesn't count as sexual molestation if it's within 20 feet of a subwoofer and laser light show." If you walked up to someone on the street and just started rubbing your crotch on them you'd get the cops called on you! But oh well, that's club culture, and you can't re-make the world to fit you, right? I am working on remaking the world to fit me, I just need a bit more time.
SteveC80 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 And that brings me back to my first post in the thread. If you like being treated like dirt, then you are as good as dirt to me. So by all means, let those women be drawn to that. That's fine by me. Never said dirt just might like "douchey" type guys becasue they bring out the submissive feminine qualities in a women bsing and pretneding to want equality in every aspect of a relationship
Titania22 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 No advice, but what state do you live in? Sydney Australia
SteveC80 Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 See... what scares me is that you're mostly right, but then it gets all mangled up in bittersville. That thing you call "a fine line" really isn't. Your eggs are drawn to that stuff its out of your control to a level A douchebag may not be mr sweetheart but he brings out the qualities you derp down want which is to be protected lead and look up to your superior Man
sweetjasmine Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 No, regular chicks who don't have major issues aren't into getting cussed out in public, Mr. Troll. Or in private, for that matter. I don't swear at, scream at, or insult my partner even if we're arguing, and I expect the same treatment in return. Zero tolerance for that kind of controlling, domineering BS.
Knittress Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Never said dirt just might like "douchey" type guys becasue they bring out the submissive feminine qualities in a women bsing and pretneding to want equality in every aspect of a relationship Why do guys somehow think "equality" means acting like a passive sissy? No, no, no. Equality means having equal voice in the relationship. So a woman who wants her man to be dominant wants him to 'be the leader,' but when she CHOOSES to speak up, have her opinion hold equal weight with his.
USMCHokie Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 A douchebag may not be mr sweetheart but he brings out the qualities you derp down want which is to be protected lead and look up to your superior Man For the most part, douchebags don't truly possess these qualities. As they say, fake it 'til you make it.
PJKino Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 I never understood why some women need to be lead around like a child.. It doesnt make me less of a Man becasue im a laid back guy who wants a relationshp to be 50/50 not me running the show but women look at that as a weakness...
Woggle Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 I never understood why some women need to be lead around like a child.. It doesnt make me less of a Man becasue im a laid back guy who wants a relationshp to be 50/50 not me running the show but women look at that as a weakness... I agree. In fact it is a sign of weakness to have to control those around you. Women over 18 are adults and I will treat them as such. A woman will find it soon enough that I am no wimp if she ever tries to do me wrong if that does not happen I see no need for drama.
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