irc333 Posted October 19, 2010 Posted October 19, 2010 I am thinking this kind of proves my point with online dating....beleive it or not, I sent out tons of email to women who but only ignore me. I had gone out with an outdoors group on a hike, good group of people shows up, and guess who shows up....one of the ladies who didn't respond. LOL And guess what, she was totally receptive in person, when she caught up with me or somehow wound up near me (in front of me on the trial) I introduced myself (yeah kind of silly she might know who I am anyhow, but just courtesy) And we talked for a while, even kind of "buddied up" eventually during the hike....she brought her camera, and asked someoen to take a picture of us together at some of the sites. She was rather nice and talkative. This made me wonder, how many of you ladies here, have ignored men online, only to bump into them in person, and be kind of be a captured audience to talk to them. You're kind of "put" into a situation where you kind of have to talk to them, allowing them to become familiar and even comfortable with you. Honestly, I think out of all the women online, I bet if they ignored a guy online, and if they ran into them in person, they'd give him a shot, as opposed to online Agreed? That being said, men, ever been in a sitation like I have...same with the ladies?
daphne Posted October 19, 2010 Posted October 19, 2010 I think it's because the number of men that respond to you is overwhelming and you can't possibly respond to all. So you try to figure out who appears most sincere, interesting and compatible. No small order. Women can get hundreds if not thousands of emails, winks etc. The thing I like about meeting people in the real world is that you can see if there's any affinity or chemistry on the spot. You take it less for granted because there aren't 200 others waiting on you. I think this same thing somewaht holds for men as well. They figure there's always someone else online and take things for granted. That's part of what I dislike about online. Too much in terms of quantity, perhaps too little in quality.
sanskrit Posted October 19, 2010 Posted October 19, 2010 She was being extra nice to you because she knows that ignoring your email entirely was rude, knows she should have either pressed the "not interested" button or sent you a simple cut and paste rejection and did not. It is amazing how getting real live human beings together cuts through BS and highlights definitively the various rudeness people practice online. Put people in a position of accountability for their words and actions (or lack thereof), take away anonymity, and online dating behavior and rudeness would change rather drastically and instantly. In all likelihood, she is not more interested in you in person as a prospective date, just assuaging her own conscience.
Cee Posted October 19, 2010 Posted October 19, 2010 I've been in the situation you mention only once. There was a guy whose profile was ok (maybe a bit too politically dogmatic), but his photo was difficult for me. I found him very unattractive, so I used his profile as an excuse not to contact him. (Sorry, but being bluntly honest). I met him at a political event and recognized him immediately. In person, he came across as worse than his profile. Not only was he unattractive, but he was socially awkward and isolative. And not friendly at all. But maybe that's because he looked at my profile and thought I was unattractive too.
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