alotalove24 Posted October 19, 2010 Posted October 19, 2010 First off, I'm new here so I'd like to say hello . Secondly I've been with my boyfriend for about 8 years on and off, I love him with all my heart and I'm sure he feels the same although sometimes I don't know. but here is my problem... Saturday night i was with my boyfriend at his house watching tv and spending time together with him. So the phone I gave him to keep in contact with me so I wouldn't worry about him when he was outside at all times of the night had been making noises because it was going dead, I was looking for it to turn it off and that's when he said "Leave it, I got it". The way he said it made me feel like WHOA, why did you say it like that. it was then that my alarm in my head went off thinking he was hiding something. So when he went to sleep, i got the phone and looked through it and saw that he had been texting some girl that I didn't know. This pissed em off because he hardly charges the phone to take with him outside to call me but he can charge it enough to text with this girl. So I confronted him about it and he said it was a girl he knew from school that contacted him over email and he only gave her his number to "catch up". I didn't believe him right there because he doesn't catch up with any of his other friends from school but out of the blue this girl hits you up after years? So anyway, I dropped it until I could get more proof. I texted the girl from my phone asking if she knew him by name and she came back telling me that she didn't know anyone by that name and that she was 9 months pregnant by her fiance. So that set off another alarm within my head. When I saw him yesterday after telling him to bring me the phone back because he didn't deserve to have it I confronted him again. He still kept lying about it and when i went through the phone with him standing in front of me I saw a text that I didn't see before, it was calling him by a different name. So I put 2 and 2 together and figured that why she didn't know him by his real name, because he gave her a different name. i asked him about this and he kept lying and saying that I'm taking it out of proportion and that the girl probably could have meant to send that to some one else and not him. In my mind I'm like she could have sent it to the wrong person but then again he could be lying. I don't know what to do or think. I know he's a freaking liar because he has lied about talking to other girls behind my back before and claimed he wouldn't do it again. This is just annoying because he acts like it's nothing. advice?
zerovandez Posted October 19, 2010 Posted October 19, 2010 Interesting. I was in a 10 year relationship when something like this similar happened to me. It was the hardest thing to go through, I feel your pain. During this whole drama of mine I should've listened to my friends and family. Instead, I listened to my heart and allowed it to get stomped on multiple more times by this same person I thought I knew. Here's what they advise I do: 1) Let go 2) Move on 3) Repeat steps 1 and 2. If he's already done this to you twice before, he probably feels as if he'll always get away with it while being with you because he know's that your love for him is your weekness. Easier said than done, just walk away. You don't NEED him in your life. You deserve to be happy and not worry all the time. You don't need to give a cell phone to a partner to assure to yourself that he/she is okay nor should you have to worry about them using it against you for such purposes. The dude sounds like a complete jerk. Leave, and don't look back. Why live your life full of worries?
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