guccibebe Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 My bf has a friend who we "think" sent me nasty messages on facebook. She has been his friend for 8 years, and has helped him through a lot in his life. he considered her his sister. I got really nasty msgs about him on fb, and the person typed like her. Well, he took her off,..and said he stopped talking to her. I found out yesterday they have been texting the whole time. he messed up and said her name while reading a text, and i asked who it was form and he said "a friend" and when I asked if she was this "friend" he said yes, and told me they text once in a while. he said its hard to just get rid of her bein she was his best friend, and the one who helped him through hard times. but he lied to me! So I told him last night, either u stop texting her or I leave this relationship. He looked sad, and said he would change his number and not give it to her. he said he would stop. Should I be mad about being lied to? about him sneaking this? he said he doesnt feel bad because its not like hes sneaking around on me with her. hes just sending friendly "hello, how are you" texts. that its not the same as it once was. How should I go about this? am I being too hard on him for this? is it really as petty as some of my friends are saying?
Cee Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 I'm confused. How did you get anonymous messages on Facebook? There has to be an account attached to every message, friend or not. And if you got a nasty message from someone you didn't know, why didn't you block them right away. Scratching my head over this. Please explain. Thanks.
Author guccibebe Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 I'm confused. How did you get anonymous messages on Facebook? There has to be an account attached to every message, friend or not. And if you got a nasty message from someone you didn't know, why didn't you block them right away. Scratching my head over this. Please explain. Thanks. It was a fake account.. and the person typed the way she does.
SincereOnlineGuy Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 So I told him last night, either u stop texting her or I leave this relationship. He looked sad, and said he would change his number and not give it to her. he said he would stop. Should I be mad about being lied to? about him sneaking this? he said he doesnt feel bad because its not like hes sneaking around on me with her. hes just sending friendly "hello, how are you" texts. that its not the same as it once was. How should I go about this? am I being too hard on him for this? is it really as petty as some of my friends are saying? You stood your ground - drew the proverbial line in the sand - and now you will follow through based on his actions. Emotionally, let it go... but IF he so much as initiates communication with this woman, then you put your threat into action. The fact that he "looked sad" gives you cause for optimism, but you have to lose the emotional inclination to be hung-up on this event for some time to come. Let HIS actions from this point forward dictate how you handle things.
Cee Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 Sounds the friend/"little sister" is having some emotional issues. And your BF has some attachment to her b/c he owes her for helping him out. You made a request that he cease contact & he didn't honor that request. I think it's time to take stock in your relationship and see if this is a deal breaker for you. If he has a pattern of deceiving you and not respecting you, then this is a major problem. If he's an okay guy, then maybe you'll forgive him for lying and move on from there. I'm not saying you shouldn't be angry- he lied. Give yourself time to work through the feelings and maybe things will become more clear.
mixwell Posted October 19, 2010 Posted October 19, 2010 I think he should tell his friend what he believes to be her that sent the message although you don't have proof. I think for you to expect him to cut off his friend of 8 years sounds a little insecure on your part.. Personally I would never cut off a true friend for a woman and he is a coward of a friend if he can just toss 8 years away like that but then again if I had to guess I would say you guys are probably in your teens or early 20s ? The best advice I can give is delete your face book account and stop letting everything know whats going on in your life.. I'm soo glad I deleted my account.
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