young&inlove Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 I was curious to find out how married couples find good healthy friends? I had a couple of friends for about a year into my marriage. They were my best friends until one tired to sleep with my hubs and the other actually succeeded a couple of times. Anyways, the hubs and I only hang out with his friends which are all guys because I have a really hard time making new friends. I am worried that once I get close to someone, they will try to screw me over again. I keep everyone at a distance because it’s easier. Where did you meet friends? How do you allow yourself to be vulnerable with them? Side note, I am 21 and hubs is 21 as well. No kids, no school. Just 2 jobs each. Workaholics.
HeavenOrHell Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 For a start I'd make sure my partner/husband wasn't a cheat before I committed to him, I also wouldn't get married until I was at least 30 (actually I'm 44 and never wanted to marry, but was in an LTR for 20 years). IMO people change a lot in their early 20's and you won't be quite the same person you are when you're in your 40's. My friends wouldn't dream of seducing my partner and he would tell them where to get off if they tried. Me and my partner are both friends with our ex's and we trust each other, we've no need to sleep with anybody else. I've just never had to worry about friends coming onto my partner or my ex, I'm quite picky about who I am friends with, my friends are compassionate and caring. I meet friends through work or through groups I've joined (groups linked to my interests-mostly helping animals). Can you trust your husband? I was curious to find out how married couples find good healthy friends? I had a couple of friends for about a year into my marriage. They were my best friends until one tired to sleep with my hubs and the other actually succeeded a couple of times. Anyways, the hubs and I only hang out with his friends which are all guys because I have a really hard time making new friends. I am worried that once I get close to someone, they will try to screw me over again. I keep everyone at a distance because it’s easier. Where did you meet friends? How do you allow yourself to be vulnerable with them? Side note, I am 21 and hubs is 21 as well. No kids, no school. Just 2 jobs each. Workaholics.
Author young&inlove Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 My husband is my best friend. Actually my only friend if you look at it right. I trust him a lot more now. He cheated on me with my friend back in January. We have worked so very hard to get back to a trusting place. It’s still not perfect but I definitely am still not 100% trusting of him. Everyone says we were two young to wed. We are now coming up to our 2 years next month. We work hard at our marriage just like anyone else. He isn’t a cheat. He cheated and made a mistake. My friend is the one who seduced him. But that’s beside the point. I work with a lot of older people and it’s not so easy to make friends here. I have tried to get along with my hubs friends girlfriends but that never works out because they are still dating around and never stick to one long enough for me to start trusting...
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