Plastikk Posted October 16, 2010 Posted October 16, 2010 (edited) For the past 2 months I have been keeping all of my emotion in about my spouse of 6 years (together 14) cheating on me. I needed to stay strong for my daughter (2 yrs). You can read my other post if you want to know my entire story. Today about 2pm until 6pm I cried, asked questions to a wall, and just felt miserable. I haven't taken a single day off of work or missed a beat since this all went down. For no apparent reason today was the breaking point. The wife wasn't even in the house so, she didn't cause it to happen. It was out of the blue and just couldn't stop it. So I am coming here for my make shift therapy cause you all always know the right thing to say. I know that its her fault for cheating. I know that I tried my best to keep it together. I guess the one thing I don't understand is while I was crying I was so ticked off at myself for crying over someone that made a choice to be with another guy. I know that is out of my control. I felt so stupid for crying over this. I realize that I still love her after all the things that she has done, but I also understand that she doesn't love me. Once again, angry at myself. Someone hook me up with something up lifting Please! Edited October 17, 2010 by Plastikk
bittermelon Posted October 17, 2010 Posted October 17, 2010 you broke down because you're human. don't feel angry at yourself for crying. you have these emotions because you love her; unless you're a robot or didn't care for her, your reaction is completely normal. i know how you feel, I'm going through it myself. go through days sometimes weeks thinking you're healing and you're fine, then bam! you wake up one day and all you do is think about that person and how they did you wrong and how you wish you could've prevented it from happening and wondering what the future holds for you. i find i'll go through an extremely difficult day of crying, but after I'm done I do feel better. i let myself cry it out, but tell myself afterwards enough is enough, gotta go on with my day. crying is supposed to release stress hormones, so maybe it'll help. sorry for what you're going through. 14 years is a long time to be with someone. just today i was thinking that no one understands my situation because a lot of people on LS were in relationships that lasted for maybe 2,3 years so i feel like they haven't invested 8 wasteful years like i did. i can only imagine how hard it is for you to be with someone for such a big part of your life and have that end. but, you have a 2 year old to care for. focus on being a good father to her. you're not stupid for crying over her. don't be so hard on yourself. you didn't do anything wrong. all you did was love a person and give that person everything only to be cheated on in the end. i think all of us who are in this situation need that periodic "break down" to release all those emotions that are pent up inside of us otherwise it'll eat us up inside. take care of yourself becaue you need to be there for your girl. hope your day is better today
Author Plastikk Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 you broke down because you're human. don't feel angry at yourself for crying. you have these emotions because you love her; unless you're a robot or didn't care for her, your reaction is completely normal. Bittermelon, Thank you so much for your kind words. I do feel much better after the breakdown. I wish you luck for what you are going through as well. Eight years is a long time to be attached to someone.
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