Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 Then nothing to bitch about. If she has no potential, you have no reason to expect anything at all from her. if two adults both agree to converse, you have to expect you will get a response when you ask a question. Argue your way around that one. And dont cop out by saying, you cant assume she acts like an adult.
Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 I say you next her and move on from this... Both of you and d-lish are stuck looking at people at potential targets in the dating world, if they dont fill your need, you disregard them like a piece of trash
Art_Critic Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 if two adults both agree to converse, you have to expect you will get a response when you ask a question. Shiot happens... the easiest way to get hurt feelings is have unreal expectations of a person that you don't know. The problem seems to be that you put expectations on her responses that she did fill and now you are upset at her for not meeting your expectations.. this makes it your problem not hers...
Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 now you are upset at her for not meeting your expectations.. Show me where I gave any insight to being upset? I guess the big LMAO in caps on the headline of this post must have gave you that idea
Art_Critic Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 Both of you and d-lish are stuck looking at people at potential targets in the dating world, if they dont fill your need, you disregard them like a piece of trash oh... I guess I'll go tell my wife that.. You have to decide if you are dating to date a woman or to make friends... because the two don't really mix in an online dating forum.
Art_Critic Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 Show me where I gave any insight to being upset? I guess the big LMAO in caps on the headline of this post must have gave you that idea This thread being created is the biggest key to it....
Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 You have to decide if you are dating to date a woman or to make friends... because the two don't really mix in an online dating forum. you're married and giving dating site advice?
D-Lish Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 if two adults both agree to converse, you have to expect you will get a response when you ask a question. Argue your way around that one. And dont cop out by saying, you cant assume she acts like an adult. I'll argue my way out of it easily- I'll converse with someone until they start acting irrationally (as you are), then I owe them NOTHING. Doesn't matter if I've known them for a week or a lifetime. She owes you NOTHING. So what, she started chatting with you- now she doesn't want to. If you've been behaving with her the same way your responses indicate here- she should be deleting you from MSN as well.
Art_Critic Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 you're married and giving dating site advice? Yes I'm married.. wife is about 15 feet from me reading a book and my 2.5 year old son just went to bed about 30-40 mins ago.. You would think that someone who met their wife on match.com would be someone who you would want advice from.. But I digress.. good luck dude...
Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 now she doesn't want to. She said she still wants to chat, she doesnt just want to address the fact that she never responded to my email.
Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 Yes I'm married.. wife is about 15 feet from me reading a book and my 2.5 year old son just went to bed about 30-40 mins ago.. You would think that someone who met their wife on match.com would be someone who you would want advice from.. But I digress.. good luck dude... lol finally hes gone
porter218 Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 You have to decide if you are dating to date a woman or to make friends... because the two don't really mix in an online dating forum. Exactly. I only go to online dating to DATE. Not to make friends. And I am not a man basher at all like Insanitylater was guessing. I just have a busy career, kids, and loads of good friends. I don't feel like wasting time talking to some guy on a dating site that doesn't have any potential with me. I could spend that time talking to someone I am interested in and who doesn't try to whine about how I didn't answer one of his messages. You know, I don't even like that kinda silliness from a guy I am interested in either.
Angel1111 Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 Still, what's wrong with her showing some courtesy? I mean, if you were talking back and forth to someone and they asked you a question, why ignore them? Even if this girl didn't want to talk to him, she could've handled the situation differently in my opinion.
Art_Critic Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 Still, what's wrong with her showing some courtesy? I mean, if you were talking back and forth to someone and they asked you a question, why ignore them? Even if this girl didn't want to talk to him, she could've handled the situation differently in my opinion. You think he has talked to her any differently than he has talked to some of the posters on this thread I think there is a whole side to the conversation we haven't heard yet.. if she was posting I'd bet you'd be surprised...
Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 Still, what's wrong with her showing some courtesy? I mean, if you were talking back and forth to someone and they asked you a question, why ignore them? Even if this girl didn't want to talk to him, she could've handled the situation differently in my opinion. Because its 2010, people dont know what courtesy is anymore. AND its online, so thats a double whammy in the lack of courtesy.
porter218 Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 Because its 2010, people dont know what courtesy is anymore. AND its online, so thats a double whammy in the lack of courtesy. Ok.. so let me put this into perspective. I have run into this a few times before. I may talk to a guy a couple of times by messages or IM on the dating site and then I'll tell him I am not interested. He will send a message out of the blue here and there and I try to respond to be courteous but every once in a while I read a message but get too busy with IMs from a guy I am actually interested in and forget to respond to his message. I get wrapped up in work and kids all week and finally I notice an IM or message from him whining about how I ignored him. That tips me off that he is really off or immature and I ignore from then on. I don't want to be bothered with people like that. I don't like negative energy and don't feel like I need to respond to negative silliness from someone I don't even know.
D-Lish Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 Because its 2010, people dont know what courtesy is anymore. Most people do get what courtesy is. Art knows what courtesy is- if he didn't, we wouldn't be able to see his avatar anymore. Honestly, this girl doesn't owe you anything. You aren't dating, you aren't friends, you've never met- what does she owe you exactly?
Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 Ok.. so let me put this into perspective. I have run into this a few times before. I may talk to a guy a couple of times by messages or IM on the dating site and then I'll tell him I am not interested. He will send a message out of the blue here and there and I try to respond to be courteous but every once in a while I read a message but get too busy with IMs from a guy I am actually interested in and forget to respond to his message. I get wrapped up in work and kids all week and finally I notice an IM or message from him whining about how I ignored him. That tips me off that he is really off or immature and I ignore from then on. I don't want to be bothered with people like that. I don't like negative energy and don't feel like I need to respond to negative silliness from someone I don't even know. Once again that has nothing to do with my situation. its not even in the same ballpark, or even the same sport. She initiated everything I refused but she kept on about it After I did it, I followed her instructions to email her, which she then read, deleted, and never responded to. She was online off and on for 6 days when I was on. I never talked to her On the 6th or 7th day, we talked in IM and I asked her about not responding and she said "I didnt know you expected a response" Now explain how your story even belongs in the same universe as mine ?
sanskrit Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 Person A, no matter who, offers to give Person B advice on their dating profile, a sensitive issue in itself. Person B takes person A at their word and sends the profile, then gets no replies to further attempts to communicate. Yes, person A is rude. Should person B make a continuing issue of it? No, because it won't do any good. OP learn a lesson from this and use dating sites only for setting up dates.
Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 Person A, no matter who, offers to give Person B advice on their dating profile, a sensitive issue in itself. Person B takes person A at their word and sends the profile, then gets no replies to further attempts to communicate. Yes, person A is rude. Should person B make a continuing issue of it? No, because it won't do any good. OP learn a lesson from this and use dating sites only for setting up dates. theres no lesson to be learned, I'm not complaining, its simply an amusing situation that I shared. Do you see anywhere in this thread where I ask for help with the situation?
sanskrit Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 Is it me or does she have a severe issue with admitting fault? This question opens the door for an answer. Jousting with other posters who suggest you are making too big a deal of this invites the advice to thicken your skin online dating. Now I understand we arent dating or any of that crap, BUT two mature adults communicating with each other, there should be a certain level of respect and common courtesy. But when you are online, its like people throw that right out the window, and flip out when you hold them accountable for their actions. I agree wholeheartedly with the above, and ranting about it is fine, but it is easy to infer that you could also use the advice to limit dating sites to expressing dating interest and asking out on dates to avoid annoyance with dating site rudeness in the future.
ascendotum Posted October 18, 2010 Posted October 18, 2010 (edited) I thought Sanskrit's post was a great concluding post to this thread (which had gone off course somewhat). I agree that courtesy is something you wont find in abundance on OLD, but as someone has already noted on the basis of this thread, your approach would likely have been a factor. As you said elsewhere, OLD is really only for entertainment for you. Edited October 18, 2010 by ascendotum
Author Insanitylater Posted October 18, 2010 Author Posted October 18, 2010 , your approach would likely have been a factor. Since she did all the approaching that would not be the case.
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