alannah Posted October 16, 2010 Posted October 16, 2010 Hello everyone, this is my first time on this site, a friend of mine told me about and said it was exremely helpful for him during his break up, and i hope its just as helpful for myself! Exactly 2 weeks ago my boyfriend of 3 years said he wanted a "break", totally came out of no where. We werent having problems, we're both so in love with each other, or at least i thought, and this break just popped up and has been eating away at me! He said he wants time for himself, seriosuly, i am not a clinggy girl at all, we both have our space when we need it, but when were together its amazing. We've been on multiple vacations together our families are so close and i seriosuly thought this was the guy for me. We've barely talked at all, and i'm dyeing to msg him, or call him, but i feel its pointless cuz he said he wants his space! its just killing me that i miss him so much and want to be with him, and i feel like hes not even thinking about me.. i cant sleep, or eat, or think, and i feel like im going insane, ive never experienced half the emotions im feeling now, and i just dont know what to do with myself or the situation.. and hes assured me that there isnt another girl, but who can ever be sure? if anyone could shed some light on my situation id really appreciate it, cuz i cant seem to make any sense of whats going in his mind
broken-and-lost Posted October 16, 2010 Posted October 16, 2010 Really sorry to hear that, unfortunately there are no real solutions here apart from giving each other space 'ive just split with my girlfriend of 3 years and it hurts like hell their were a few problems that i worked on to fix but she decided to end it anyway I don't know why your boyfriend has done what he's done might be cold feet might be he's met someone or that he just wants to be alone. All you can do is try and concentrate on yourself but it's not going to be easy the not sleeping eating drives me nuts right now i keep reading it will fade. I hope things turn out how you want them but a lot of people on here end up losing their partners but just moving on at some point good luck to us all
Billie The Puppet Posted October 16, 2010 Posted October 16, 2010 Breaks are soft break ups, he is seeing how he can manage without you. Your story matched mine only it was my GF that did it to me, we got back together only to split up for good a month later when she found some one else but also assured me there is no one else. Breaks cause you to reflect on the relationship and I'm sorry to say this but when they feel the need to assure you or volunteer to you that there isn't someone else there almost always is. The way I see it is breaks are break ups for the dumper so they are free to look elsewhere but keep dumpees on the back burner as a dumpee will feel its just a break I cant see other people. It's selfish in my opinion. I'd like to give you a more positive response but I am just going off of my experience and being a realist. I just tend them to be more of a negative side I'm sure there may be some positive side replies too. Stick to giving him space though.
Author alannah Posted October 16, 2010 Author Posted October 16, 2010 thank you both for your responses! a break is such a harsh reality and it just really sucks that the person you dedicate your life and all your love to for 3 years can just leave you with no explination. I will definitely keep myself busy as suggested and just pray that i get through this! I never realized how hard it actually is when someone leaves you, i always thought people were over dramatic about it, like in movies and just experiences with friends.. but now that im here, its like a whole other world that im stuck it and cant get out of.. but i know i can do it, and so can all of you!! best of luck to any one dealing with the same heartache! everything happens for a reason, life goes on.. and so should we!
Gt.ooh Posted October 16, 2010 Posted October 16, 2010 thank you both for your responses! a break is such a harsh reality and it just really sucks that the person you dedicate your life and all your love to for 3 years can just leave you with no explination. I will definitely keep myself busy as suggested and just pray that i get through this! I never realized how hard it actually is when someone leaves you, i always thought people were over dramatic about it, like in movies and just experiences with friends.. but now that im here, its like a whole other world that im stuck it and cant get out of.. but i know i can do it, and so can all of you!! best of luck to any one dealing with the same heartache! everything happens for a reason, life goes on.. and so should we! Yes, exact same situation. Softest way to break-up. U can and YOU WILL get through it. Trust me when I say there will come a day when u'll be sitting, driving, or working and you'll think. It's all their loss, we have done nothing wrong. Never ever blame yourself. I did that for the first intial weeks and it just dug me into a rut. We gave it our all, and when they meet someone else they're reality check will hit them..just like it does for us dumpees. Now what I take from this is: I'm not giving myself to another person until they do the same in return. My ex did nothing for me, while I gave up everything I had to support her while she was going to school. All I got was a soft break-up...drove me insane..led me to do things I said I'd never do watching other friends break-up..and left me high a dry.
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