Six months later and she still "wants to be single."

[Green]

stop getting obsessed with specific girls who don't want to date you. I think its great that you tried to get her to go out with you, but really you shouldn't take it so personaly or get upset when she doesn't...

 

If you just followed my advice you would have a gf by now. ASK LOTS OF GIRLS OUT, don't take it personal when they reject you.... MAKE MOVES like TOUCHING and KISSING. Do this with lots of girls... ONLY ONES YOU FIND ATTRACTIVE (that means mind,body,spirit ect.)

 

Stop letting one girl who says "wants to be single" upset you. Who cares, just kiss her next time you two are alone and see if she still wants to hang out with you after that.

[Surrealist]

Few days ago, I went to a dinner and movie with this guy as friends.

 

I know he likes me and I know that I am not attracted to him in that way. I already told him that I just want to be friends and he keeps asking me to hang out anyway. So I accepted this time because I had no other plans and was bored.

 

Half way through dinner this guy starts asking me for reasons on why I don't want to date him. He also starts sitting closer to me which made me REALLY uncomfrortable. I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I told him that I am just not ready for a relationship. He said that we can just date and see where it goes - to which I replied that I don't want to date anybody (this couldn't be further fro the truth, I just didn't want to date HIM).

 

Newsflash: girls would much rather be single than date someone they are not attracted to.

 

 

Here it is in a nutshell. The same can be said with guys as well - when I'm not any way attracted to a woman that flirts with me she is straight on the ignore list. I haven't had any luck in all my years with women either but here's the cold hard truth laid out by OG. I dare say this girl is being very nice to you mate.

[gypsy_nicky]

Few days ago, I went to a dinner and movie with this guy as friends.

 

I know he likes me and I know that I am not attracted to him in that way. I already told him that I just want to be friends and he keeps asking me to hang out anyway. So I accepted this time because I had no other plans and was bored.

 

Half way through dinner this guy starts asking me for reasons on why I don't want to date him. He also starts sitting closer to me which made me REALLY uncomfrortable. I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I told him that I am just not ready for a relationship. He said that we can just date and see where it goes - to which I replied that I don't want to date anybody (this couldn't be further fro the truth, I just didn't want to date HIM).

 

Newsflash: girls would much rather be single than date someone they are not attracted to.

 

OMG SEriously

[Surrealist]

OMG SEriously

 

Why not? I have only one date in the past five years (separated pending divorce) with someone I had not attraction to, and I wouldn't dare continue to date or have a relationship with anyone I wasn't attracted to no matter how long Im without.

[Cracker Jack]

Sorry you're still having a tough time, Somedude. I do agree with the others who believe you should try not to get too caught up with this girl--but....I also know when you haven't done well with women most of your life, it's easy to look and possibly see a light of hope with a woman, even when it's likely not there. Logic is just hard to use in these situations. At least you're trying, tho.

 

Hope things get better for you.

[OceanGirl]

Here it is in a nutshell. The same can be said with guys as well - when I'm not any way attracted to a woman that flirts with me she is straight on the ignore list. I haven't had any luck in all my years with women either but here's the cold hard truth laid out by OG. I dare say this girl is being very nice to you mate.

 

 

I feel a bit bad because I was so blunt with my post and I know rejection is not easy to take. I also face rejection by men I am attracted to and it's horrible. Essentially, it doesn't matter if there are many people that want to date you - it's all worth nothing if they are the people you feel no attraction to. We are all pretty much in the same boat.

[somedude81]

Thank you all of you for the great posts, especially to bac for explain things to me about women that I had no idea.

Sorry you're still having a tough time, Somedude. I do agree with the others who believe you should try not to get too caught up with this girl--but....I also know when you haven't done well with women most of your life, it's easy to look and possibly see a light of hope with a woman, even when it's likely not there. Logic is just hard to use in these situations. At least you're trying, tho.

That's exactly what it was. I had some hope that finally a girl was starting to be into me. I knew she didn't actually like me yet, but I hoped that would change if we went on a few dates. And she won't even let that happen.

 

Now all I can do is hope that I quickly get over her and remove her from my mind so I stop thinking about her and be able to notice other girls.

[lino]

This girl isn't interested in you at all. It's as simple as that mate.

 

If I was you, I'd also stop hanging around her.

[Tim The Enchanter]

I'm amazed that anyone would hang around for 6 months. Learn to take a hint already.

[somedude81]

I'm amazed that anyone would hang around for 6 months. Learn to take a hint already.

Uh, I didn't hang around for six months. She rejected me in April then we simply stopped talking till the semester ended in May. There was no contact at all over the summer.

 

During the summer I went on three dates with a different girl. So I was completely over the first girl.

 

I was dismayed when this girl showed up in my class. I did not want to see her again because I knew exactly what would happen.

 

There is something about her personality that really meshes with my own. We're very similar and it's hard for me to resist her.

[brainygirl]

You asked in an earlier post why would she not want to date? You also stated that she doesn't hang out with people on campus.

 

So let me run through this real quick: She doesn't socialize on campus or with college kids, while you are older than most of them and try to hang.

 

first of all, that's just wrong. Go hang out with people your own age. Its time to grow up.

 

Second, you don't know this girl, you don't know about her life or home life or past or anything. When I was in college I was also raising my son on financial aid, mourning my mom's recent death, and playing care taker to my alcoholic father and my teen aged brothers. I turned down a HUGE number of offers for dates.

 

Please, if you want to be more successful with women, quit chasing women who are so much younger than you are (and don't argue that you are at that level, it isn't going to help win over me or the girls). Quit taking it so personally when you pine for a girl who isn't interested.

 

Mature, act your age, hang out with people you have a peer relationship with.

[Tim The Enchanter]

Uh, I didn't hang around for six months. She rejected me in April then we simply stopped talking till the semester ended in May. There was no contact at all over the summer.

 

During the summer I went on three dates with a different girl. So I was completely over the first girl.

 

I was dismayed when this girl showed up in my class. I did not want to see her again because I knew exactly what would happen.

 

There is something about her personality that really meshes with my own. We're very similar and it's hard for me to resist her.

 

My point remains. She rejected you once and you persisted. When girls are being wishy-washy with you or vague, they're usually doing that to avoid the awkward situation of having to tell you they don't fancy you.

[brainygirl]

Hey Somedude, we're both in the same boat pal. I've learned that if i want to get a girl I need to persist, because women are never immediatly attracted to me. I would say hit on other girls too , but with the one in question try to kiss her or make a move on her. If she gives you a slap or gets freaked out, fu** her she is a waste of time anyway. The best way to deal with rejection is to act like every woman who acts like this is an object or worthless, if you start seeing women in this light you will see how easy it is to not waste your time with cockteasers and attention whores. Be a man, go out there looking for sex only, it will save you a lot of disappointment, save the relationship lovey dovey BS for women who PROVE TO YOU that they are worthy of your affection. It's easy to get discouraged when you go out there looking for a relationship with a woman, because first of all most women out there don't deserve it, and second of all, it's pretty disheartening to realize the fact that most women would rather have no strings attached sex over a juiced up tall guy with spikey hair over a fulfilling and deep connection with a guy whose got nothing particularly wrong with him but he just doesnt "give her butterflies" at first sight.

 

If you try to get 100 women to have sex with you, 1 statistically just has to. And once you get in a womans panties she falls in love by nature. Keep on trucking.

 

The same can be said about men who constantly reject women who aren't slim enough or young enough to get them all hot and bothered.

[Surrealist]

You asked in an earlier post why would she not want to date? You also stated that she doesn't hang out with people on campus.

 

So let me run through this real quick: She doesn't socialize on campus or with college kids, while you are older than most of them and try to hang.

 

first of all, that's just wrong. Go hang out with people your own age. Its time to grow up.

 

Second, you don't know this girl, you don't know about her life or home life or past or anything. When I was in college I was also raising my son on financial aid, mourning my mom's recent death, and playing care taker to my alcoholic father and my teen aged brothers. I turned down a HUGE number of offers for dates.

 

Please, if you want to be more successful with women, quit chasing women who are so much younger than you are (and don't argue that you are at that level, it isn't going to help win over me or the girls). Quit taking it so personally when you pine for a girl who isn't interested.

 

Mature, act your age, hang out with people you have a peer relationship with.

 

Yeah just make sure if you're hanging with people your own age now that you sooner or later get one dude! Cos seriously in another 10 to 15 years these young cuties who are rejecting you now will come out of hiding from their bad boy relationships, albeit 40 to 60 pounds heavier and on the major physical decline, possibly a couple of kids, hunting you down like a pathetic ****ing animal if you're still single then, suddenly having a reawakening that what they really wanted all this time was the 'nice guy' after all. Believe me from experience, nothing worse and more degrading especially if through all those years you have made the effort to take care of yourself to remain attractive to prospective partners and these lazy saggy cows come along and think you almost owe it to them to reciprocate their flirting gestures. Painful man, expecially when it happens in the workplace like my recent three hideous, disturbing encounters!

[brainygirl]

WTF is with all the hate?

 

Blow it out your asses, woman haters.

 

I'll take my old (29) saggy (really? you've never seen me) ass with all I don't have to offer (smart, fun, great job, good outlook on life) and go talk to some people who can not be *******s.

 

The previous two posts are EXACTLY why you BOYS aren't having any luck with women. You act like put upon VICTIMS of female prejudice, while taking no responsibility for your own contributions to the situation.

 

I REITERATE grow up, gain some maturity. Start treating women like PEOPLE and not OBJECTS.

[SteveC80]

If you're an average Joe guy until women hit a certain age your gonna have to date signifcantly down in looks

 

The average women has many more options gets hit on and more sexual advances then the average dude so where they stand in the social food chain of looks is highly inflated in their minds.

 

Add in college she might get banged by a drunk quarterback on the football team or something and thinks she can nab a 10 when she was just being used

 

Go for an obese girl with no options whos just lucky to get somebody who isnt disgusting looking and might actually look at you as her dating up

[Surrealist]

WTF is with all the hate?

 

Blow it out your asses, woman haters.

 

I'll take my old (29) saggy (really? you've never seen me) ass with all I don't have to offer (smart, fun, great job, good outlook on life) and go talk to some people who can not be *******s.

 

The previous two posts are EXACTLY why you BOYS aren't having any luck with women. You act like put upon VICTIMS of female prejudice, while taking no responsibility for your own contributions to the situation.

 

I REITERATE grow up, gain some maturity. Start treating women like PEOPLE and not OBJECTS.

 

If you dont mind old overweight scruffy men continually hitting on you even when you have clearly showed you have no interest and can tolerate that, thats cool. Personally I hate it, especially when it is in the workplace and it makes the working environment uncomfortable and awkward. I should of added that on one occasion I reported one of these situations and it was considered sexual harrassment by the HR officer. Im not sorry for hating those situations, or grudging the women who persist with it, please ban me from this site if it is such an offense.

[brainygirl]

If you dont mind old overweight scruffy men continually hitting on you even when you have clearly showed you have no interest and can tolerate that, thats cool. Personally I hate it, especially when it is in the workplace and it makes the working environment uncomfortable and awkward. I should of added that on one occasion I reported one of these situations and it was considered sexual harrassment by the HR officer. Im not sorry for hating those situations, or grudging the women who persist with it, please ban me from this site if it is such an offense.

 

By all means reject unwanted offers and report idiots of all genders who persist, especially at work, that is not what you communicated.

 

You implied that all women who at the moment aren't interested in him, will become fat pathetic slobs who no one would touch with a pole. Which simply isn't true.

 

Nor is it true that women have it "Easier" in dating. I AM sick and tired of the woman bashing because you guys aren't having any success in dating.

 

Women get used, treated badly and rejected for shallow (she's not thin enough) reasons all the time. And yet women who don't maintain the physical form necessary to attract all men are lazy, but men who will not cultivate interests beyond "but I'm so nice, why wont the hottest girl in the room date me?" get a pass.

 

ITs crap.

[SteveC80]

By all means reject unwanted offers and report idiots of all genders who persist, especially at work, that is not what you communicated.

 

You implied that all women who at the moment aren't interested in him, will become fat pathetic slobs who no one would touch with a pole. Which simply isn't true.

 

Nor is it true that women have it "Easier" in dating. I AM sick and tired of the woman bashing because you guys aren't having any success in dating.

 

Women get used, treated badly and rejected for shallow (she's not thin enough) reasons all the time. And yet women who don't maintain the physical form necessary to attract all men are lazy, but men who will not cultivate interests beyond "but I'm so nice, why wont the hottest girl in the room date me?" get a pass.

 

ITs crap.

 

 

Ive yet to see a post where the op said he needs a 10 or the hottest girl in the room youre projecting your own insecurities into this thread

 

The only ones ive seen on here in the past are posts the other way aorund where average women complain that they cant get the hottest guys

[somedude81]

You asked in an earlier post why would she not want to date? You also stated that she doesn't hang out with people on campus.

 

So let me run through this real quick: She doesn't socialize on campus or with college kids, while you are older than most of them and try to hang.

 

first of all, that's just wrong. Go hang out with people your own age. Its time to grow up.

 

lease, if you want to be more successful with women, quit chasing women who are so much younger than you are (and don't argue that you are at that level, it isn't going to help win over me or the girls).

Where do I meet people my own age? 90% of people I see on a weekly basis are 18-22.

 

What do I have in common with people my own age?

 

Would a woman 25 years or older have any interest in a man who is a non-working full-time college student with basic zero relationship and sexual experience?

Second, you don't know this girl, you don't know about her life or home life or past or anything.

Your right, I know very little about her. I would love to know more. All I know about her is that she's geeky, somewhat socially awkward and she used to be much heavier.

My point remains. She rejected you once and you persisted. When girls are being wishy-washy with you or vague, they're usually doing that to avoid the awkward situation of having to tell you they don't fancy you.

Which is exactly what I expect. Girls never fancy me. So I can try super hard and hope I get lucky or give up.

Hey Somedude, we're both in the same boat pal. I've learned that if i want to get a girl I need to persist, because women are never immediatly attracted to me.

Yup, same exact boat.

I would say hit on other girls too , but with the one in question try to kiss her or make a move on her. If she gives you a slap or gets freaked out, fu** her she is a waste of time anyway. The best way to deal with rejection is to act like every woman who acts like this is an object or worthless, if you start seeing women in this light you will see how easy it is to not waste your time with cockteasers and attention whores. Be a man, go out there looking for sex only, it will save you a lot of disappointment, save the relationship lovey dovey BS for women who PROVE TO YOU that they are worthy of your affection.

I'm a little confused on having them prove themselves to me. Are you talking about after one has had sex with them? Cause I really can't imagine any girl making an effort to me.

It's easy to get discouraged when you go out there looking for a relationship with a woman, because first of all most women out there don't deserve it, and second of all, it's pretty disheartening to realize the fact that most women would rather have no strings attached sex over a juiced up tall guy with spikey hair over a fulfilling and deep connection with a guy whose got nothing particularly wrong with him but he just doesnt "give her butterflies" at first sight.

Yeah it's very discouraging. What sucks is seeing them get hurt, knowing that it was completely avoidable.

If you're an average Joe guy until women hit a certain age your gonna have to date signifcantly down in looks

 

The average women has many more options gets hit on and more sexual advances then the average dude so where they stand in the social food chain of looks is highly inflated in their minds.

 

Add in college she might get banged by a drunk quarterback on the football team or something and thinks she can nab a 10 when she was just being used

 

Go for an obese girl with no options whos just lucky to get somebody who isnt disgusting looking and might actually look at you as her dating up

Yup average girls are way too highly valued. That's more of a societal problem.

 

Many years ago I did lower my standards and let an obese girl come onto me. She had serious personality issues and her body was pretty gross. I'm never again going to go after somebody who doesn't turn me on.

 

So for the past couple years, I've been sticking to the low end of average, 5-7, but maybe I'm actually a 4 and that's why those girls don't even go for me.

[brainygirl]

Ive yet to see a post where the op said he needs a 10 or the hottest girl in the room youre projecting your own insecurities into this thread

 

The only ones ive seen on here in the past are posts the other way aorund where average women complain that they cant get the hottest guys

 

If you dig a little, you will see that these same guys complaining about being ignored have hugely high standards for appearance, age, and beuty in their women.

 

This shallow attitude keeps them single, but it seems that to you guys, women are either pretty or obese, there is no middle ground, which is silly and not reflective of reality.

[Woggle]

Why are you getting mad at these guys simply for venting? Why do some women get so bent out of shape when a man simply says what most of us think?

[SteveC80]

 

This shallow attitude keeps them single, but it seems that to you guys, women are either pretty or obese, there is no middle ground, which is silly and not reflective of reality.

 

Who says this? Once again your projecting your own insecurities on this thread

[brainygirl]

Why are you getting mad at these guys simply for venting? Why do some women get so bent out of shape when a man simply says what most of us think?

 

Because its hateful. It isn't venting, its hate. If women had a thread going talking about what pathetic loosers the guys hitting on them were and how only fat, broke, bald men approached them, the mods and every guy on the board would be all over it.

 

But you guys generalize women horribly and its absolutely ok-fine.

[SteveC80]

Because its hateful. It isn't venting, its hate. If women had a thread going talking about what pathetic loosers the guys hitting on them were and how only fat, broke, bald men approached them, the mods and every guy on the board would be all over it.

 

 

Ive actually seen this on here but it doesnt effect you so you ignore it

 

Men get mroe **** for being shallow then women