theone11 Posted October 13, 2010 Posted October 13, 2010 Does time apart make the heart grow fonder or do they just forget about you and move on?
Nkognito Posted October 13, 2010 Posted October 13, 2010 It depends but I will spare your hope. I have googled "No contact" and "how to win her back" among other queries in search of how relationships work. Each one is different and in time the two people will choose a path. Whether that path is back to the one they left is entirely up to them but to the one that got dumped, it's best to pick up what's left of yourself and move on. I know its kind of hurtful to put it like that but there is no true way to get anyone back because you nor I have control over someone else's feeling's or behavior. I will say that if you had a pretty decent relationship that instantly disappearing might make the other person think about what was there when you were around. Will it make them want you back? Maybe. Will you be missed? Possibly. The fact is between the dumper and dumpee that both will think of the other after the two have split. Moreso for the Dumpee as it was not his/her decision but for the dumper, they forced their mindset to make this move and regardlessof how hard it was to make or how hurtful they did not want to be, they still made the choice. Eventually they will have a sigh of relief but then they will miss your personality and insight to things regardless of how minute they were. Soon the dumper will be on the rebound path and depending where they are in their heads, they might compare you to the new guy/girl. This is why "No Contact" is detrimental because the more you keep in contact the better the new fling will look regardless if it never works out. the point of no contact is for you and you alone. It is to build you up internally because sometimes we become so involved with someone that we lose that self-security opening up so much. I was with a girl for almost 3 months, I do not know why I was so into her but we split a few days before the 3rd month kicked in. Her mom was in the hospital, she was on a big capital murder appeal case and behind at work. I was cut loose because she knew how much I felt for her but she did not feel the same. She told me she wanted to love like I do but she did not see it. Even said she did not see the long haul with me and then said "I would know by now". I am a great guy or so she said and I have done things she truly appreciated. Is it enough to make her think she made a mistake? Maybe. Will she be back? I don't know because right now, I come first. I left my wife of 12 years, I know how I felt when I left as the love was gone, the intimacy was no more. It must have crushed her more than my recent ex has done to me. But I know what it is like to leave but I dont miss my ex-wife. So I can only assume this is how my ex-gf feels.
TLCbear Posted October 13, 2010 Posted October 13, 2010 Does time apart make the heart grow fonder or do they just forget about you and move on? Really depends on the reason for the break up. My second relationship, my SO broke up with me 8 months into the relationship. He said he was going through alot of problems at the time and was feeling pretty burnt out (we were 2 hours away and he use to come see me every weekend.) Anyway, he sent me a letter about a year later after our break up...that's when we started contacting each other again. I was amazed to see a big change in his mindset, however, mine had changed to. He wanted to get married and I didn't, so to make a long story short, we ended the relationship for good. Only heard from him one time since and he's now married with 2 kids. So I say it can go either way.
USMCHokie Posted October 13, 2010 Posted October 13, 2010 Really depends on the reason for the break up. My second relationship, my SO broke up with me 8 months into the relationship. He said he was going through alot of problems at the time and was feeling pretty burnt out (we were 2 hours away and he use to come see me every weekend.) Anyway, he sent me a letter about a year later after our break up...that's when we started contacting each other again. I was amazed to see a big change in his mindset, however, mine had changed to. He wanted to get married and I didn't, so to make a long story short, we ended the relationship for good. Only heard from him one time since and he's now married with 2 kids. So I say it can go either way. And this is why contact with exes can only happen long down the road, like in terms of years, if at all...you are able to see things much more clearly and objectively since emotions won't be getting in the way...
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