guinnessdraft Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 What's worst? I think I've done the first and been close to the second. Sorry that I'm stirring the pot/borderline trolling this forum. It's just a thought I've been having. Emotional cheating--I guess there can be varying degrees. You can have a very emotional relationship with someone and mutually agree not to have sex so as I not turn it into an affair. But you can also just both be really friendly with one another to a point where people think you're dating--that's happened to me. Sex with strippers - They're totally objectified. It's just a job for them. There's not emotions involved but actions occurred. In our society, action is all that matters so for some it feels like emotionless sex would be worst. But I'm not sure. Feedback from forum swings 50/50 with the obvious feedback of "talk to your spouse". Monogamy - I never understood this either. If you have 20 girlfriends, gets married 5 times, but never cheated on any of them. Would this be consider monogamous? 25+ sex partners should pretty damn polygamous to me.
reservoirdog1 Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 What's worst? I think I've done the first and been close to the second. Sorry that I'm stirring the pot/borderline trolling this forum. It's just a thought I've been having. Emotional cheating--I guess there can be varying degrees. You can have a very emotional relationship with someone and mutually agree not to have sex so as I not turn it into an affair. But you can also just both be really friendly with one another to a point where people think you're dating--that's happened to me. Sex with strippers - They're totally objectified. It's just a job for them. There's not emotions involved but actions occurred. In our society, action is all that matters so for some it feels like emotionless sex would be worst. But I'm not sure. Feedback from forum swings 50/50 with the obvious feedback of "talk to your spouse". I read your other post, too. The one about the strippers. The important question isn't "which is worse". The important question is, "what would my partner think about me doing this?" If you're sneaking around and hiding things from your partner, that's a pretty good indication that the things you're hiding are incompatible with your relationship. Makes the math reeeeeeal simple. Monogamy - I never understood this either. If you have 20 girlfriends, gets married 5 times, but never cheated on any of them. Would this be consider monogamous? 25+ sex partners should pretty damn polygamous to me. Polygamy is a form of marriage (though I guess commonlaw would work too) where one person has several partners all at the same time. Having 25, 50, 100 or 1,000 partners during your life isn't polygamy, if you weren't in a relationship with more than one of them at once.
Author guinnessdraft Posted October 12, 2010 Author Posted October 12, 2010 I read your other post, too. The one about the strippers. Polygamy is a form of marriage (though I guess commonlaw would work too) where one person has several partners all at the same time. Having 25, 50, 100 or 1,000 partners during your life isn't polygamy, if you weren't in a relationship with more than one of them at once. Semantics...yes that is the definition of polygamy. Back in the days when premarital sex was not allowed, monogamy made more sense to me. Now, I don't know what it means. Does it mean that you stay with your partner until you both get bored. Then divorce and more on to the next partner?
theBrokenMuse Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 Monogamy - I never understood this either. If you have 20 girlfriends, gets married 5 times, but never cheated on any of them. Would this be consider monogamous? 25+ sex partners should pretty damn polygamous to me. I think you meant polyamorous but it really doesn't fit that particular description unless there was hanky panky going on with more than one person at any given time, otherwise it's considered serial monogamy.
Feelin Frisky Posted October 13, 2010 Posted October 13, 2010 Calling it sex with strippers is baloney. If they have sex for money, they are not strippers, they are prostitutes. Say the words: sex with PROSTITUTES. Repeat till it sinks in. Strippers, strip and tease for salary and gratuities--it ends there. When they have sex with men it's either as women for their own joy or prostitutes for your money. "Emotional cheating" sounds like another way to frame something that makes it somehow other than what it is--extra-marital sex (or non-monagamous sex). Sorry, can't cosign self-deception.
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