DustySaltus Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 One year ago today I ceased all contact with my ex fiance. I don't know how I made it to where I am today, but I did. It was and sometimes continues to be a long journey towards getting back to being myself. Sometimes I see pictures of myself from a few years back (before we were together) and I just seemed like a happier person. I continue to fight through the lingering feelings, unpleasant thoughts, negative vibes, bitter attitude and untrusting outlook on relationships. I know it's been said a million times on here, but it does get better. I know that someone who truly loved me would never do the things that she did to me. I realize that it wasn't my fault (although i'm not perfect) and I can't ever control someone else's emotions. These are things that I might've been naive about in the past. But I continue to become a bigger, better me. That's what we all need to focus on...becoming bigger, better individuals. There were so many days I wanted to pick up the phone and tell her how I was feeling at that particular moment, but I never did. There were so many times when I wanted to look at pictures at her, kept myself from doing it. The person that we thought they were are not the person they are. When we go NC with them we create an image of them in our heads. Early on the negatives are hidden and we put them on a pedestal. So often during this moment do we break NC only to be hit with artificial happiness from them, awkwardness, anger, bitterness, vindictiveness or the dreaded.....Indifference. Stick to NC and pick up the pieces. One day at a time. There's a reason why things didn't work out. Try not to replay those reasons in your head over and over and over again. Just understand that there's a plan for you but you need to change from within first.
HopeLove Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 Good for you you are feeling better, hope you'll heal soon!
health Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 Congrats man! Keep it up and stick to no contact! I was no contact for almost 2 years - before I broke it just to tell her I wanted to clear things up and that I was happy and hope she is as well. When we broke up after 5 years + she rebounded 3 days later - that tore me apart. SHe replied - but I should have never broke no contact - her loser drug addict boyfriend then threatened me - I ignored him - but it just opened up a can of worms that should have been closed. I looked at her photos again too. It's hard man. You seem to be doing good. Keep at it as best as you can.
TheUnthoughtKnown Posted October 15, 2010 Posted October 15, 2010 Everything you said is where I'm at now. I was severely tempted last night to text my ex an tell her bout this thing that's happened in my life recently, and knowing I couldn't just broke my heart all over again 6 months in, I was beginning to wonder if it was normal, but reading your post really helped. Thanks!!!
Perhaps Posted October 15, 2010 Posted October 15, 2010 One year ago today I ceased all contact with my ex fiance. I don't know how I made it to where I am today, but I did. It was and sometimes continues to be a long journey towards getting back to being myself. Sometimes I see pictures of myself from a few years back (before we were together) and I just seemed like a happier person. I continue to fight through the lingering feelings, unpleasant thoughts, negative vibes, bitter attitude and untrusting outlook on relationships. I know it's been said a million times on here, but it does get better. I know that someone who truly loved me would never do the things that she did to me. I realize that it wasn't my fault (although i'm not perfect) and I can't ever control someone else's emotions. These are things that I might've been naive about in the past. But I continue to become a bigger, better me. That's what we all need to focus on...becoming bigger, better individuals. There were so many days I wanted to pick up the phone and tell her how I was feeling at that particular moment, but I never did. There were so many times when I wanted to look at pictures at her, kept myself from doing it. The person that we thought they were are not the person they are. When we go NC with them we create an image of them in our heads. Early on the negatives are hidden and we put them on a pedestal. So often during this moment do we break NC only to be hit with artificial happiness from them, awkwardness, anger, bitterness, vindictiveness or the dreaded.....Indifference. Stick to NC and pick up the pieces. One day at a time. There's a reason why things didn't work out. Try not to replay those reasons in your head over and over and over again. Just understand that there's a plan for you but you need to change from within first. Hey DS, good to hear you're well on your way to awesomeness. Which is awesome. I remember your advice way back when I was still struggling with my issues and it's good to know that you're doing a lot better. And like you said, one day at a time is the best pace. I wish you all the best.
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