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Im pretty sure pigs started flying....


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Posted (edited)

Wow.

My ex, who was very cold and strict with me not bothering him, and told me that I can only ask him things about my court case, contacted me yesterday.

I called him Friday and left him a message because I found out some new details that were overwhelming and i thought he could refer me to a good lawyer. Well he called me back that night and we SPOKE....i was shaking like a leaf and all the talk was legal, then I said bye.

 

So last night, I was on AIM and he IMed me and asked me if I had any more questions. so we talked about it briefly. THEN!

HE ASKED ME IF SCHOOL IS OK. we ended up talking about that and a few others things-work, pets, etc.

 

I thought i was dreaming. i called my mom just to make sure its real. Seriously.

 

we talked for about an hour. he wasnt overly nice, but he was trying to talk to me about life. it was crazy. I finally initiated saying bye, after 40 min of us not saying anything (we talked mostly back and forth for an hour, then it kinda faded off). I told him to take care and he said for me to do the same, and he said if anything else happens he wants to know.

 

It just sucks though. we didnt have a connection.. its sad how things change. he seemed still emotionally blocked off.

 

So idk?! Is he trying to soothe a guilty conscious? did hearing my voice spark something? Or did it make him realize just how over me he really is? Does he miss me? Hes SO hard to budge, usually when he makes his mind up he sticks to it. And he has been strict for months with not talking about anything. Anyone have any input??? Should I just wait and see if he tries to talk to me again? This is SO weird.

Edited by summerl0vesyou
Posted

Your post proves why breaking NC is dangerous, you're asking all these questions and wondering about his every word. If he wanted you back, you'd know about it.

Posted

I don't have any input but I think your thread title is pretty good :)

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Posted
Your post proves why breaking NC is dangerous, you're asking all these questions and wondering about his every word. If he wanted you back, you'd know about it.

 

im not really worried about him wanting me back. its more so WHY is he doing this...but nobody knows except him. i just wanted to see peoples opinion on why someone could/would do that.

Posted

WOW!

He spoke to you about legal things!

Couldnt you have phoned someone other than an ex. I think if he wanted you back he wouldnt just speak about legal stuff sorry.

Posted
im not really worried about him wanting me back. its more so WHY is he doing this...but nobody knows except him. i just wanted to see peoples opinion on why someone could/would do that.

 

 

Just to be nice, check in etc. Places you on the back burner.

 

It's the same question for every thread when dumpers suddenly get in contact with an ex and the same answer.

 

Dumpees will over analyze and thus giving dumpers the power.

 

This is why NC is healthy not dangerous, Contact with an ex is dangerous because we will always question the contact being made.

 

It could be as simple as an ex contacting like so:

 

Dumper: Hey I was just wondering how you are doing, it's been a long time?

 

Dumpee: [Thoughts OMG my ex wants to know how I am doing? what should I say? what should I do? does this mean they want back in?] I'm doing fine and thank you.

 

Trust me I got all the questions it boosts their ego if they know they still have you thus their desire to want you = nothing.

 

Be honest with your self if you didn't want your ex back you wouldn't care why they are contacting you.

Posted

Sounds like you now have evidence of how completely over you he is.

 

Shouldn't you be somewhere near the same for him, by now?

 

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