waynebrady Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 I have noticed that the majority of the posters on here seem to be females, and it's the same on other relationship/dating type forums, Why? Women say all the time on places like this about how the man should put in all the effort, initiate every contact every date, work to get her, that the woman should make the man "chase" her and all that... It shure doesn't seem like women who think like that even want a guy, So I'm thinking why are you even on this type of site when it's obvious you have no intrest in finding a guy?
Anela Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 How many women who chased, ended up being labeled a bunny boiler? I don't expect men to do it all, but it usually works better with the man doing the chasing, and the woman reciprocating in some way, not the other way around.
callingyouuu Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 How many women who chased, ended up being labeled a bunny boiler? Same thing happens to guys who overstep the semi-arbitrary line of being too "desperate." This goes both ways. OP, I'm a little bit confused by your question. If you're asking why men are supposed to do all the initiating, it's just more socially acceptable for us to take the plunge. If you're asking why more women are on LS than guys, I think more of them just happen to be interested in relationship discussions. What I'm guessing that you're trying to ask is a hybrid of the two, where it's more like "If guys are expected to initiate, why are women on LS?" I actually don't see how the two are mutually exclusive...? A lot of girls come on here wondering how to hint to a guy to ask her out, which I think fits both of your questions.
Anela Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 I've seen comments from other women here, who have said they appreciate the insight into men that they've received from men here. There are plenty of posts from women trying to understand men, trying to fix their relationships, or wanting to talk because they've had their hearts broken (or just plain wanting to talk, whether it be socializing or trying to help others). I also don't think I've seen a post from a heterosexual woman, stating that she doesn't want a man, unless she feels like giving up. So, that's a big assumption on your part.
Awesome Username Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 You know how in football the guys kind of form a little idea circle at timeouts before they clap hands and go out and play more ball? It's kind of like that.
callingyouuu Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 You know how in football the guys kind of form a little idea circle at timeouts before they clap hands and go out and play more ball? It's kind of like that. LOL! I don't mean to be rude, but to a lifelong football fan, the way you described a "huddle" is adorably funny.
Anela Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 You know how in football the guys kind of form a little idea circle at timeouts before they clap hands and go out and play more ball? It's kind of like that. LMAO! I was wondering why I made the mistake of coming here tonight, when I was feeling all emotional, but that made me laugh out loud.
Awesome Username Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 LMAO! I was wondering why I made the mistake of coming here tonight, when I was feeling all emotional, but that made me laugh out loud. Hahaha! Glad I could make your night!
elaina Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 I have noticed that the majority of the posters on here seem to be females, and it's the same on other relationship/dating type forums, Why? My friends who are guys are too busy to post on a forum. They like doing other things and spend their time in pursuits that interest them more. They think my writing on forums is a "waste of time." Obviously, other men do like writing on forums and find it to interest them enough to use their time to do so. I think more women write on relationship forums then men because women like to talk about relationships alot, and relationship forums are another way of talking about relationships. Now, there are women who'd rather not and don't, but yeah, that's why I think more women write on relationship-type forums than men. However, people are different. Some people like to write, and some don't. No big deal.
Author waynebrady Posted October 11, 2010 Author Posted October 11, 2010 I think more women write on relationship forums then men because women like to talk about relationships alot. Which is strange since it's usually the man who put's in all the effort into the relationship and initiates everything. It's pretty much the guy who makes the whole relationship work.
elaina Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 Which is strange since it's usually the man who put's in all the effort into the relationship and initiates everything. It's pretty much the guy who makes the whole relationship work. I disagree, at least for healthy relationships. In a healthy relationship, both partners should put effort and heart into the relationship. Men and women are different, and even men and men are different (not all men are the same) and women and women are different (not all women are the same.) This spans ethnicity as well. You will not find all women of any ethnicity to be the same. One thing that's important though is what one puts into the relationship and what one expects back. With my boyfriend, I expect myself to love him, be faithful to him, trust him, laugh with him, be beautiful for him, and lots of other things, including enjoying life with him! I expect him to love me, be faithful to me, trust me, LAUGH WITH ME , enjoy life with me, and so forth. Now, I don't expect him to do things like me (be pretty for me lol) though he does work out and is fit, though that's mainly because he likes to be and is disciplined. I learn a lot from him. If you don't know any couples where both the partners put effort and heart into their relationships, they are out there, though maybe not as many as should be.
bac Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 I have noticed that the majority of the posters on here seem to be females, and it's the same on other relationship/dating type forums, Why? Women say all the time on places like this about how the man should put in all the effort, initiate every contact every date, work to get her, that the woman should make the man "chase" her and all that... It shure doesn't seem like women who think like that even want a guy, So I'm thinking why are you even on this type of site when it's obvious you have no intrest in finding a guy? Visualise yourself to be chased by a bunch of very ugly/fat chicks. Do you really want it in your life?
USMCHokie Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 Which is strange since it's usually the man who put's in all the effort into the relationship and initiates everything. It's pretty much the guy who makes the whole relationship work. Ummm...this "common knowledge" of yours is inaccurate...again...
carhill Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 Why are there so many women on here? OP, it's the same reason your future wife and her girlfriends will get together and dissect your marriage. It's what they do. Accept it. Spend more time pursuing healthy friendships with men and worry less about what women do or why. The good news is you don't have to live their lives. Don't
LoveLace Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 It's no different then say for example, going to a party with a group of girls one side and guys on the other. Chances are the women are talking aobut men, relationships and trying to understand them, etc. The men are probably talking about sports. And weather or not we "want a man" doesn't mean we should be voided from giving or receiving advice...
Trimmer Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 Which is strange since it's usually the man who put's in all the effort into the relationship and initiates everything. It's pretty much the guy who makes the whole relationship work. Heh heh... if you're gonna troll, at least make it something clever and amusing...
tami-chan Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 Heh heh... if you're gonna troll, at least make it something clever and amusing... ...I agree...like this: Because their chain is too long?
Author waynebrady Posted October 12, 2010 Author Posted October 12, 2010 Heh heh... if you're gonna troll, at least make it something clever and amusing... If you don't have anything to say except that then don't post. And no I'm not a troll and I could care less if you don't think it's clever or amusing.
Taramere Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 I have noticed that the majority of the posters on here seem to be females, and it's the same on other relationship/dating type forums, Why? Women say all the time on places like this about how the man should put in all the effort, initiate every contact every date, work to get her, that the woman should make the man "chase" her and all that... It shure doesn't seem like women who think like that even want a guy, So I'm thinking why are you even on this type of site when it's obvious you have no intrest in finding a guy? You might have got the wrong idea about what some of these relationship sites are about. People, here at least, discuss romantic relationships but also like to discuss, platonic, work and family relationships - as well as politics, current affairs and life in general. The name Loveshack maybe misleads newcomers into thinking that it's a sort of hooking up thing. If you're coming at it from the angle of someone whose primary focus is on trying to hook up with someone - and maybe even using this site as a potential pick-up place - you're probably going to be sorely disappointed. That might be a big part of why quite a lot of posters seem to get so frustrated with the site and quite hostile to the people who post on it. Chances are that although people do sometimes hit it off on here, generally posters are interested in getting tips and insights that will help them to maintain or improve the quality of their existing relationships rather than forming new ones online.
Author waynebrady Posted October 12, 2010 Author Posted October 12, 2010 (edited) You might have got the wrong idea about what some of these relationship sites are about. People, here at least, discuss romantic relationships but also like to discuss, platonic, work and family relationships - as well as politics, current affairs and life in general. The name Loveshack maybe misleads newcomers into thinking that it's a sort of hooking up thing. If you're coming at it from the angle of someone whose primary focus is on trying to hook up with someone - and maybe even using this site as a potential pick-up place - you're probably going to be sorely disappointed. That might be a big part of why quite a lot of posters seem to get so frustrated with the site and quite hostile to the people who post on it. Chances are that although people do sometimes hit it off on here, generally posters are interested in getting tips and insights that will help them to maintain or improve the quality of their existing relationships rather than forming new ones online. I'm not using this place as a pick up place. What gave you that idea? Read any of my posts and you will see that that is not why I'm here. I think you misunderstood me. I know perfectley well this is not a hooking up place and I know that you can discuss alot of different things here and not just about dating and relationships. But most of the topics and most of the sections here are about man/woman relationships, wouldn't you agree? My point is that since women don't really have any intrest in men, I say this because women always post stuff about how the man should do all the "chasing" and put in all the effort and initiate everything and so on, why be on a relationship dating type of forum? I know you can discuss other things to here but you get my point I hope. Most Men have a high intrest in finding a woman, while most women it seems couldn't care less about finding a man. That's why I think it's so strange that there are so many women and so little men on these types of forums Edited October 12, 2010 by waynebrady
Author waynebrady Posted October 12, 2010 Author Posted October 12, 2010 Same thing happens to guys who overstep the semi-arbitrary line of being too "desperate." This goes both ways. OP, I'm a little bit confused by your question. If you're asking why men are supposed to do all the initiating, it's just more socially acceptable for us to take the plunge. If you're asking why more women are on LS than guys, I think more of them just happen to be interested in relationship discussions. What I'm guessing that you're trying to ask is a hybrid of the two, where it's more like "If guys are expected to initiate, why are women on LS?" I actually don't see how the two are mutually exclusive...? A lot of girls come on here wondering how to hint to a guy to ask her out, which I think fits both of your questions. Yes that's kinda what I'm asking. Men have it harder, we are expected to initiate everything, put in all the effort and do all the chasing. You'd think more men would need advice and discuss things since it's harder for us
Disillusioned Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 It's because they're not in Los Angeles. Therefore they have no idea that there are about 20 single men in this town who are looking, to every 3 single women in this town who are looking. If you're a single woman and you're having no luck, move to L.A. and you'll be singing a different tune. There are so many single men here, you can practically pick them from the trees. If you're a man in L.A., learn to like banjo music and go out to some hillbilly towns where the women are complaining about not being able to find men.
flying Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 I'm not using this place as a pick up place. What gave you that idea? Read any of my posts and you will see that that is not why I'm here. I think you misunderstood me. I know perfectley well this is not a hooking up place and I know that you can discuss alot of different things here and not just about dating and relationships. But most of the topics and most of the sections here are about man/woman relationships, wouldn't you agree? My point is that since women don't really have any intrest in men, I say this because women always post stuff about how the man should do all the "chasing" and put in all the effort and initiate everything and so on, why be on a relationship dating type of forum? I know you can discuss other things to here but you get my point I hope. Most Men have a high intrest in finding a woman, while most women it seems couldn't care less about finding a man. That's why I think it's so strange that there are so many women and so little men on these types of forums Well, I guess you could take it as a sign that you may need to revisit your basic assumptions about whether women care or not. Just saying.
Taramere Posted October 12, 2010 Posted October 12, 2010 My point is that since women don't really have any intrest in men, I say this because women always post stuff about how the man should do all the "chasing" and put in all the effort and initiate everything and so on, why be on a relationship dating type of forum? I haven't seen many threads where women are talking about what men should do with regard to initiating relationships. To me, the discussion here is a bit more thoughtful than people spouting a lot of generalisations from the 1950s and earlier. Not to say there aren't posts like that. You may well be right, and it could be that I just skim over those particular posts. If the notion of women expecting men to chase them is one that you find particularly irritating, then it could be that you'll tend to zoom in on posts like that where another person might feel indifferent to them and therefore not really notice them.
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