OliveOyl Posted October 9, 2010 Posted October 9, 2010 Interesting... I just checked the "competition" in OKC in my area (25 miles). That is, women in the 40-55 age range. I would say easily over half are significantly overweight. I'm not talking 10-15 lbs overweight. I mean 30+ lbs or more. Secondly... a lot of the women had really crappy photos. Blurry, or trying to hide their figures, or just plain bad. I'm not ready to jump into online dating. But when I am... I will be at the weight I desire (around 10 lbs to go) AND I will sure to get *great* photos up.
bac Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Interesting... I just checked the "competition" in OKC in my area (25 miles). That is, women in the 40-55 age range. I would say easily over half are significantly overweight. I'm not talking 10-15 lbs overweight. I mean 30+ lbs or more. Secondly... a lot of the women had really crappy photos. Blurry, or trying to hide their figures, or just plain bad. I'm not ready to jump into online dating. But when I am... I will be at the weight I desire (around 10 lbs to go) AND I will sure to get *great* photos up. It does not matter how you look for dating on OKC. You are older than 40 and most men in 40-50s who have some potential for a R prefer women in 20-30s. But, online, there is hard to find men with any emotional potential for a R in 40-50s. Most men, who are at least OK, are married/attached by 40-50s. But, the men, who are available on OKC, have a good physical potential for ONSs and FWBs. The men are not picky about quality of their ONSs and FWBs at all, and they focus mostly on quantity. They simply want to have sex with every online's woman who lets them it. That is why looks of the older women are less important than the ability of the women to be easy for sex and low maintenance.
OceanGirl Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Eh, men in their 40s and 50s may want women in their 20s and 30s, but to be honest with you, I wouldn't touch a 40-50 men with a ten foot pole (I am 31). I even struggle to find men around 35 attractive. I prefer 25-32.
Author OliveOyl Posted October 10, 2010 Author Posted October 10, 2010 It does not matter how you look for dating on OKC. You are older than 40 and most men in 40-50s who have some potential for a R prefer women in 20-30s. But, online, there is hard to find men with any emotional potential for a R in 40-50s. Most men, who are at least OK, are married/attached by 40-50s. But, the men, who are available on OKC, have a good physical potential for ONSs and FWBs. The men are not picky about quality of their ONSs and FWBs at all, and they focus mostly on quantity. They simply want to have sex with every online's woman who lets them it. That is why looks of the older women are less important than the ability of the women to be easy for sex and low maintenance. There are not divorced men on OKC (like I will be, when I start online dating)? I saw lots of men's profiles stating they want ages 35-55. Not exactly 20-30s. I live in a fairly large metropolitan area. Oh, and finally, you assumed I wanted an R. I didn't state that. Maybe I want FWB too.
OceanGirl Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 I found that men are pretty reasonable when in comes to age. On OKC, the 35 year old guy that I dated had a preference for 30-40 year old women (that's what it said in his profile). He explained that he finds below 30 women too immature and he can't deal with that.
OceanGirl Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 BTW I just did a search of 20-35 year olds within 50 miles of where I live. There were 43 pages of men and only 17 pages of women. I like it
ascendotum Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 "I saw lots of men's profiles stating they want ages 35-55. Not exactly 20-30s. I live in a fairly large metropolitan area." Guys in their 40-50s chasing for women in their 20s is a little extreme, though I have no doubt women in their 20s are getting winks from 'delusional' guys in their 50s. The guys I know and (myself) who are in their early to mid 40s ideally are still searching for a long term relationship with a women idealy in their early to mid 30s. The guys I know who would make ideal partner for women (attractive/good $ career/well built) tend to be players when it comes to online dating. These guys get the bulk the communication with women, have lots of options and they capitalize on it. Usual MO, date a women for a week or up to a few months then break up with her or get busted lying, and repeat. Any woman with sex appeal in their mid to late 30s I tend to find ask for their age down for a partner, so average guys in their 40s looking for average women in 30s are not having a fun time, and for the average guys I know who tried online dating in their 30s and got bugger all dates, now have more of a short term / ONS / FWB outlook. "I would say easily over half are significantly overweight. I'm not talking 10-15 lbs overweight. I mean 30+ lbs or more." lol. It’s not just your area. "Eh, men in their 40s and 50s may want women in their 20s and 30s, but to be honest with you, I wouldn't touch a 40-50 men with a ten foot pole (I am 31)." I might have you confused with someone else here, but I thought you made a post the other week regarding interest you had in some older guy (40+) you met at a coffee shop. "BTW I just did a search of 20-35 year olds within 50 miles of where I live. There were 43 pages of men and only 17 pages of women. I like it" I bet. 2.5 to 1 is pretty good odds. On the site I was on a few years back the ratio was 3 to 1, but if I took out people over 40 and the overweight women the ratio went to 8 to 1. I checked out the competition on the site and I was really surprised at how good looking so many of the men were, given what women said. I wondered how many were genuinely single.
irc333 Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 I have to ditto this!!!! ALL the women that show up in my search function are all chronically OBESE, not 10 or 20 lbs chunky either. It's amazing how people seriously let themselves go at such a young age...Anyway...I think I figured out this MIGHT have been done deliberately. Most searches, when you customize the search, you can do a search by "body type - thin, average, slender, etc" Turns out, if you try to do that it's a "members only" function, so I'm thinking as some kind of marketing ploy the deliberately put all the obese people in an initial search, where you have to PAY for the ability to search for body types that you want....pretty clever. So what I end up doing is clicking on a profile of a fat woman, then look at the column of thinner women in the right hand corner that say, "other women that are also in the area or similar to you" Then I go that route. lol Interesting... I just checked the "competition" in OKC in my area (25 miles). That is, women in the 40-55 age range. I would say easily over half are significantly overweight. I'm not talking 10-15 lbs overweight. I mean 30+ lbs or more. Secondly... a lot of the women had really crappy photos. Blurry, or trying to hide their figures, or just plain bad. I'm not ready to jump into online dating. But when I am... I will be at the weight I desire (around 10 lbs to go) AND I will sure to get *great* photos up.
Insanitylater Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Interesting... I just checked the "competition" in OKC in my area (25 miles). That is, women in the 40-55 age range. I would say easily over half are significantly overweight. I'm not talking 10-15 lbs overweight. I mean 30+ lbs or more. Secondly... a lot of the women had really crappy photos. Blurry, or trying to hide their figures, or just plain bad. I'm not ready to jump into online dating. But when I am... I will be at the weight I desire (around 10 lbs to go) AND I will sure to get *great* photos up. Finally a smart women that scouted her competition. You would not believe how many women I've chatted with on dating sites, and none of them have ever looked at their competition. They all got attitudes when I mentioned it saying "what do I care how their profiles look" Like they instantly got offended that I even mentioned other women exist on the planet besides them
SincereOnlineGuy Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Interesting... I just checked the "competition" in OKC in my area (25 miles). That is, women in the 40-55 age range. I would say easily over half are significantly overweight. I'm not talking 10-15 lbs overweight. I mean 30+ lbs or more. Secondly... a lot of the women had really crappy photos. Blurry, or trying to hide their figures, or just plain bad. I'm not ready to jump into online dating. But when I am... I will be at the weight I desire (around 10 lbs to go) AND I will sure to get *great* photos up. "Great photos" has nothing to do with "the competition", it's just common sense. Either you ARE on the dating site, or you're not...
bac Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Eh, men in their 40s and 50s may want women in their 20s and 30s, but to be honest with you, I wouldn't touch a 40-50 men with a ten foot pole (I am 31). I even struggle to find men around 35 attractive. I prefer 25-32. I have felt the same way all my life. They are not attractive sexually. But, I had a period in my life (in mid-30s) when I wanted a daddy for taking care of me.
PhillyDude Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Finally a smart women that scouted her competition. You would not believe how many women I've chatted with on dating sites, and none of them have ever looked at their competition. They all got attitudes when I mentioned it saying "what do I care how their profiles look" Like they instantly got offended that I even mentioned other women exist on the planet besides them Well it is kind of a weird question. Why would I want a woman asking me about other mens profiles??
bac Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 There are not divorced men on OKC (like I will be, when I start online dating)? I saw lots of men's profiles stating they want ages 35-55. Not exactly 20-30s. I live in a fairly large metropolitan area. Oh, and finally, you assumed I wanted an R. I didn't state that. Maybe I want FWB too. There is an abundance of men who have never been married. They might have a good reason for that. For example, PDs, psychiatric disorders, no job for a long time, addictions and other stuff. Most men who are looking for casual sex set a wide range of females' age. They are not serious anyway. Therefore, if there are no younger girls available for a while, they will contact the much older women to take care of the men's dry spell. If you want FWB, you are going to have a lot of fun online, especially with guys in 20s if you are OK with them.
sagetalk Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 There is an abundance of men who have never been married. They might have a good reason for that. For example, PDs, psychiatric disorders, no job for a long time, addictions and other stuff. Inorance: the state or fact of being ignorant : lack of knowledge, education, or awareness. What about they just haven't found the right girl?
Cee Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Since bac is offering some advice that is congruent with my OKC experience, I will ask... I already know that OKC is a gold mine for attractive older women looking for fwb and nsa sex... But is OKC worth it for a 40 year woman looking for an LTR? I would adamantly say no, but if anyone has had a different experience, I'd like to hear it.
sagetalk Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Interesting... I would say easily over half are significantly overweight. I'm not talking 10-15 lbs overweight. I mean 30+ lbs or more. And you wonder why some of the guys are so cranky on here. If civilization keeps this up, only desperate men will have children. Scary thought.
tigressA Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 You make it sound like it's only the women who are getting fatter.
sagetalk Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Inorance: the state or fact of being ignorant : lack of knowledge, education, or awareness. What about they just haven't found the right girl? Ignorance: the state or fact of being ignorant : lack of knowledge, education, or awareness.
sagetalk Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 You make it sound like it's only the women who are getting fatter. Fat guys can still get really hot girls, it usually doesn't work the other way around.
Surrealist Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Eh, men in their 40s and 50s may want women in their 20s and 30s, but to be honest with you, I wouldn't touch a 40-50 men with a ten foot pole (I am 31). I even struggle to find men around 35 attractive. I prefer 25-32. Can't say I disagree with you, and that coming from a 40 year old myself. The difference is, older guys as well as women, who look after themselves. Lots of older guys and women who are not mindulf of their diet and lifestyle habits end up invariably overweight and fugly. So looking after oneself, that is, go to the gym, hygiene, dress, weight control, so on - I always say you cannot control your chronilogical age but you can control your biological age to a large degree. Not to boast as I am more of a self-critic and negative pessimist if anything, but I do get quite a bit of attention from young women in their early 20s and so on, much more so in real life as I'm not photogenic.
Eeyore79 Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Eh, men in their 40s and 50s may want women in their 20s and 30s, but to be honest with you, I wouldn't touch a 40-50 men with a ten foot pole (I am 31). I even struggle to find men around 35 attractive. I prefer 25-32. I feel the same way! I'm 30, but people usually assume I'm in my early twenties. To me, men in their forties and fifties are old men, and aren't attractive to me at all; I'm attracted to men who look roughly the same age as me, not men who look old enough to be my father. Plus I want to get married and have kids, and men in that age group are simply too old to raise kids with. I prefer to date younger men from age 25 upwards, although I would stretch to early thirties if the man in question was attractive and youthful. I will admit, however, that I do get a kick out of dating younger men, particularly the innocent and inexperienced sort who I can enjoy corrupting
Author OliveOyl Posted October 10, 2010 Author Posted October 10, 2010 You make it sound like it's only the women who are getting fatter. Well to be honest, in my browsing of OKC I saw more significantly overweight women in my age range than overweight men. Now I'm not judging, I know after a couple of kids, long marriages and pre/peri/post menopause, weight IS a very difficult issue for a lot of women. I've struggled myself. But what surprised me just as much was the (low) quality of the photos. A lot looked like they had been taken from old group photos and half of the photo was just chopped off. Several were blurry or very far away, and several were attempts to do the "MySpace" angle with rather dismal results. I think if someone is struggling with their weight, then they need to take even MORE care with their photos (with lighting, hair, and makeup, and clothing). The kind of effort we used to take when we got our high school graduation pictures done. I know I'm sounding rather arrogant here, considering I haven't even put up a full profile and photo. But I really think the photo is probably 90% of the profile. You can have the absolutely best-written, high-"value" profile balancing honesty and humor, but one bad photo will ruin it.
PhillyDude Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Well to be honest, in my browsing of OKC I saw more significantly overweight women in my age range than overweight men. Now I'm not judging, I know after a couple of kids, long marriages and pre/peri/post menopause, weight IS a very difficult issue for a lot of women. I've struggled myself. But what surprised me just as much was the (low) quality of the photos. A lot looked like they had been taken from old group photos and half of the photo was just chopped off. Several were blurry or very far away, and several were attempts to do the "MySpace" angle with rather dismal results. I think if someone is struggling with their weight, then they need to take even MORE care with their photos (with lighting, hair, and makeup, and clothing). The kind of effort we used to take when we got our high school graduation pictures done. I know I'm sounding rather arrogant here, considering I haven't even put up a full profile and photo. But I really think the photo is probably 90% of the profile. You can have the absolutely best-written, high-"value" profile balancing honesty and humor, but one bad photo will ruin it. I agree, i learned that today. No mattr how funny your reply is if there is one bad photo it's over.
irc333 Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 You make it sound like it's only the women who are getting fatter. Actually, I'm starting to notice this is something women are doing more than men....actually, I am thinking there are more obese women (weight wise) than men, I could be wrong, maybe since I'm looking for just women. But, I'm seeing younger women getting FATTER at even a younger age than men. Like I'm seeing late 20's women that look 50-60 lbs (or more over weight) while men tend to gain half that much. Like men get obese, but women tend to get morbidly obese. I see some of those photos of even the 20 something women, and remember how skinny I was at that age, LOL...and just shake my head and thinkg (How can ANYONE get them selves to be that huge?) Now, getting older, tend to gain weight, that's understandable, but I'm noticing even younger generations or blimping out. I think the younger generations also tend to eat out a lot, too.
irc333 Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 (edited) On VERY rare occasions I've seen this happen. There's this seriously morbidly obese computer guy that is living with his girlfriend, the girl is probably 90lbs soaking wet, and I'd bet he's approaching...let's say...late 200's. But yeah, you do see hot chicks with not so great looking guys, more so than the other way around, I mean even Hugh Hefner is attracting hotties (he's not fat, but he's ...well, elderly, and women don't seem to have a problem looking at him naked. But, I'll bet you'll never see an 80 something year old woman (an equivalent to Hef, attracting handsome men, like Heidi, Bridget and friends, lol) Personally, I don't see what she sees in a guy that fat, but she's in love with him. And I know a guy, skinny as a rail, married a woman 200+ lbs, big gal, I probably thought (well, she probably put on the pounds after they got married) But I saw the wedding photo, and there she was, big gal, him skinny as a rail. But, I was wondering if his extreme skinniness would have anything to do with it? They look like an "01" or "10" walking next to each other. (and I'm not making fun, just trying to give you a general picture of the situation) Now I've seen women with "Chunky" handsome guys, kind of like Kevin James types, handsome men, but just a gut on them. Women dont' seem to mind obesity as much as men do. I've personally been attracted to hefty women (even perhaps considered oveweight by normal standards) but....they fill out VERY nicely and evenly, they'd have the genetic gift of getting bigger boobs, an equivalent hip size, and just a slightly thicker waist. Just think Valerie Bertanelli's Daughter (Forgot her name) Fat guys can still get really hot girls, it usually doesn't work the other way around. Edited October 10, 2010 by irc333
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