Daisy_May Posted October 9, 2010 Posted October 9, 2010 I have been reading alot of threads lately and I have started to notice that these MM say I Love you to us quiet soon after the A has begun. For example my MM told me he loved me 3 weeks after starting the A ( we had known each other for a couple months before that thought) and I do love him, I just wasnt ready at that time when he said it to me. I could be totally wrong about this just an observation which leads me to my next question... do you think, that they think that by saying to us, that they love us it would be easier for us to go along with the A? Thoughts?
Fieldsofgold Posted October 9, 2010 Posted October 9, 2010 I have been reading alot of threads lately and I have started to notice that these MM say I Love you to us quiet soon after the A has begun. For example my MM told me he loved me 3 weeks after starting the A ( we had known each other for a couple months before that thought) and I do love him, I just wasnt ready at that time when he said it to me. I could be totally wrong about this just an observation which leads me to my next question... do you think, that they think that by saying to us, that they love us it would be easier for us to go along with the A? Thoughts? that's entirely possible. Also I have read that MM say it much sooner than SG, because they don't have to follow it up with actions, like a marriage proposal. SG's are much more careful aboutvslinging around "I love you's" because more would be expected of them, as a result.
Circular Posted October 9, 2010 Posted October 9, 2010 I think men are more apt to confuse love with infatuation. It can be a very subjective term.
GreenEyedLady Posted October 9, 2010 Posted October 9, 2010 (edited) I have been reading alot of threads lately and I have started to notice that these MM say I Love you to us quiet soon after the A has begun. For example my MM told me he loved me 3 weeks after starting the A ( we had known each other for a couple months before that thought) and I do love him, I just wasnt ready at that time when he said it to me. I could be totally wrong about this just an observation which leads me to my next question... do you think, that they think that by saying to us, that they love us it would be easier for us to go along with the A? Thoughts? Mine didn't tell me "I love you" until we had been together over a year. And in the beginning he started with "Ditto." I should also add that I didn't know I was in an A from the beginning. We are also married now. GEL Edited October 9, 2010 by GreenEyedLady
Fieldsofgold Posted October 9, 2010 Posted October 9, 2010 Mine didn't tell me "I love you" until we had been together over a year. And in the beginning he started with "Ditto." I should also add that I didn't know I was in an A from the beginning. We are also married now. GEL OMG, you didn't know he was married? IMO, people who are slower to say "I love you" are more likely to really mean it. Just my opinion.
Jane Doe Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 do you think, that they think that by saying to us, that they love us it would be easier for us to go along with the A? Absolutely!! People will say anything to get what they want. It sounds so much better having an affair when there's "love" involved. The true test of love will be whether or not he'll leave and spend his life with you.
GreenEyedLady Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 OMG, you didn't know he was married? IMO, people who are slower to say "I love you" are more likely to really mean it. Just my opinion. No I didn't know. He said he was divorced. And when I questioned him further, he said he just didn't want anything serious, so we dated off and on for the next year. (I wanted serious with someone great.) I found out the truth and things just made sense. And he fell in love and the rest I guess is history. And he is great. He owned up to his lies and made amends with those he wronged (as much as he could) and we're living our own happily ever after, married version. It was a long twisty road, but totally worth it. He is my lover, my partner and my best friend. And I believe I am his as well. GEL
Angel1111 Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Of couse, that's always a possibility. But a lot of times with affairs, an emotional affair has been going on for some time before they actually get together, so those words are probably sincere. xMM and I talked for a couple of months so by the time we were physically together, the feelings I had for him hit me like a ton of bricks. But it wasn't until another couple of months that I knew I was totally in love with him. And that's the point where he eluded to being in love with me, too. I believe his feeings for me are/were genuine but I also believe that he said other things to keep me around. I think that's typical.
Circular Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 I told her I loved her after being friends with her for a few years and being deep in the EA after 4 months (though the time is fuzzy given 'when' it started is negotiable). Looking back, a little after 6 months of going NC, guess what? I was telling the truth, and I still do.
pdx Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 I'd been friends with her four years, felt it for two. We'd been dancing around the EA for a year before I told her I loved her. It wasn't a surprise - all she said was, "I know."
delirious Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 My MM certainly did not say he loved me within a short time, i don't think I would have believed him. He admitted that he was no good at communicating his feelings, however now after two years he said lovingly 'we are in a right 'ol mess now eh? (I think that meant he loved me LOL) MEN!!
KarmasTestDummy Posted October 10, 2010 Posted October 10, 2010 Sometimes but I also believe that he may be lacking so much of that in his m that feeling intimacy and respect and passion all at once out ofthe blue can make for that instant connection that we all talk about so much. It can be so overwhelming that it does feel like honest and true love. It's easier to recognize something if you've never felt it before.
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