15 years and frustrated

[shane147]

Sorry, I don't talk to many people about this, so I can vent on here a bit and look at replies. I've been married 15 years and we have 3 kids together. We were married right out of high school. We have both changed through the years and it is so very, very flat. I've tried all sorts of things, but honestly, my heart just isn't in it anymore. I'm in my early / mid 30's and I don't feel that things will ever change. Our communication is very, very poor. She is a control freak and would most likely sooner eat dog crap than admit when she is wrong. We recently moved to a new town for some new jobs. I thought that a change of scenery would help us out, but it hasn't. We even make way more money than we did before, so money isn't the big issue now.

 

IN terms of intimacy, we were apart for several months and for a short time we were interested in each other. It didn't take long at all for everything to get back to feeling like a job again. The long and short of it is that she is very spoiled and see's no need to reciprocate how I treat her in bed.

 

In so far as parenting, we get into some major fights because I feel that she undermines me as a father by making a big issue of how and when I discipline. For instance, she is quick to say... "if you don't do this or that... I'll get your father". When I intervene, she is very quick to second guess me or interrupt and sort of.. pull back the leash. Unfortunately, our kids don't get to see us very happy together very often, so I'm afraid that we are showing them a poor example of what a marriage should be.

 

I am so scared that we can / will continue down this road we are on now, only to throw in the towel as soon as the kids are grown. She has thrown "maybe you should leave" at me many, many times and we have come close a few times, but a kiss and make up session puts a patch on things for a few weeks. I don't know what to do. I almost get irritated when I see couples together who smile and look genuinely happy. I don't know if it is an act or if that is how it really is.