sodapop Posted October 3, 2010 Posted October 3, 2010 ive been with this guy for about 3.5 years, i met him online, and he's never visited before. he planned to a few times, but somehow never managed. despite what everyone says about online relationship, i've fallen really deep for this guy. but like many LDR's, this was really tough. we have our issues, and i made a few mistakes (nothing serious at all, but they build up over time). i was about to break up with him a few months ago, but i gave the relationship another chance. however, after trying to work on my LDR for another two and half months, i finally broke it off with my boyfriend, officially. most of the reason is because i really can't see a future between us, its too hard to work it out and neither of us are going to be relocating any time soon, and i'm definitely not going to be able to wait anymore. the break up was messier than i wanted it to be. he was angry at me, got sad, was neutral, then got angry again. i miss him terribly most of the time, and i keep thinking it's such a shame to break up with him. he's always been my best friend, i have never been able to confide with anyone the way i can with him. i've been trying so hard to move on, but it's so hard. we broke up about four days ago, but although we dont talk to each other a lot we still kept a bit of contact. we have sort of agreed to stay as friend, and he said that he thinks we're doing okay still talking to each other. for instance, he talked to me this morning, and we had a nice little conversation for a bit, and he had to go. after that i just missed him even more, and felt sadness again. when he called later in the day, i didn't pick up at the first call, but did on the second. i told him i was busy and had to go. i was upset and cried, and it was then that i realized i can't keep contact with him. whenever i talk to him i can't help but secretly wish i didn't break up with him. and i think that's an awful feeling, because i know there's no way to work our relationship out anymore. about an hour and more after that he im-ed me. it was then that i told him i can't talk to him anymore, for at least a month, and that he shouldn't talk to me either. honestly i felt i was being really harsh, and it was so hard to not just fall apart and say something stupid like 'lets get back together'. he however, took it really bad. he's angry and confused, and obviously doesn't agree with me. he said he hates me now, and will never talk to me again. after trying and failing at explaining to him why it's for the best, i said my goodbye's and wished him good luck, and blocked and deleted him. but right now i just feel so upset, i dont know if it was the best decision to not talk to him. i know i'll miss him like mad. but at the same time, i know i wont be truly happy staying in a relationship with him. im not sure when i can say hi to him again and if he will ever want to talk to me anymore. i just want some advices and help, a reality check or something. right now i'm feeling really upset and a bit guilty. i just don't know what to do anymore )':
Pyro Posted October 3, 2010 Posted October 3, 2010 doing the right thing is not always the easiest. What you did was the right thing. You did what was best for you and even though it hurts now it will eventually pass. I am in a LDR myself but only because we have plans to be together. If we never made plans then we wouldn't be doing this. Like you said its hard enough to be away from the person. Take it one day at a time and you will have to maintain no contact with him to heal fully. This is the best thing for the both of you. Hang in there.
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