From best friends to strangers: this is the saddest part...

[pandagirl]

Day 19 of NC and 29 days since we broke up.

 

I'm actually doing pretty well. I know it was for the best that we parted ways. We don't hate each other. We still love each other. There is no bitterness. I'm excited because I am focusing on myself more, and motivated to get my life in order once again. It's all good.

 

But, I still cry every day thinking about how he is fading out of my life and it really scares me. Though I wish I knew how he was doing, I have no intentions of breaking NC, because I know it would only make me sad.

 

I just can't believe that we're leading such separate lives now, and that it's possible it will just be like this forever. If I think about it too much, I just start tearing up.

 

And I know that I will get over it, but even that is a horribly scary thought to me. Like he'll just be a picture in a scrapbook.

[redmelon]

your post reminded me of this lyric: "a love for real, not fade away..."

 

I hope we all find that down the line from these heartbreaks

[Hopelesslyforgotten]

Your thread title simply brought me to tears Panda!

 

Sigh. I know what you're feeling. I, unfortunately against my best interests, have not been as strong as you are. My ex and I have been in contact...i dont know what is to come of it if anything.. but it's still hard to believe that we aren't meant to be with eachother...

 

But it's crazy when someone who was such a big part of your life becomes a memory. It's even more scary to think that those memories will eventually fade...

[pandagirl]

Your thread title simply brought me to tears Panda!

 

Sigh. I know what you're feeling. I, unfortunately against my best interests, have not been as strong as you are. My ex and I have been in contact...i dont know what is to come of it if anything.. but it's still hard to believe that we aren't meant to be with eachother...

 

But it's crazy when someone who was such a big part of your life becomes a memory. It's even more scary to think that those memories will eventually fade...

 

Hey! I've been wondering how you've been doing.

 

So what's the update?

 

And, yes, it's scary to think that those memories will eventually fade, too...

[Hopelesslyforgotten]

I know! I kind of went MIA for a little bit!

 

Last week was his birthday, I was going days before that not contacting him but then I decided to send him a bday text...when I texted him simply saying 'happy birthday, hope it's a great one!' he continued the convo. I wasn't expecting to be saying anything else more than the happy bday, but he was the one that kept initiating the convo. It was a good convo, almost like I was reconnecting with someone who I haven't spoken to in a while...we were both very cheery and lighthearted (if that makes any sense).

 

We've been talking more since then...some flirting (ironically lol). I try not to bring up the talk about the relationship yet, I know how pushy I can be and I realize that I can't be that way...when it somewhat did come up he told me that he thought he could never fully move on from me...and i told him i obviously haven't moved on. I tried not to talk to much about it but I did ellude to the fact that I still want to be with him (which I don't know if that was good for me to do, but what's done is done!).

 

But who knows what's to come of it. I still have the glimpse of hope, but I do realize that in the end, if nothing comes of this, I can only be doing more damage to myself then good by continuing talking to him. But I don't feel ready yet to completely stop talking to him... I don't know what it is inside of me saying telling me that I am not ready to let go. It's crazy because i've NEVER been like this with any of my other exes. Maybe that's why I feel like I just can't let go.

 

I am very happy to hear that you are doing well Panda!! It is great to hear that you are focusing on yourself!! But I am also so sorry to know that you are crying everyday!! You have been so strong Panda and I truly admire your strength! Keep your head up!!

[Sonolumino]

I'm looking forward to this actually. I'm ashamed I loved her. I feel almost nothing toward her now.

 

"The hottest love has the coldest end" - Socrates

[Ajax]

Day 19 of NC and 29 days since we broke up.

 

I'm actually doing pretty well. I know it was for the best that we parted ways. We don't hate each other. We still love each other. There is no bitterness. I'm excited because I am focusing on myself more, and motivated to get my life in order once again. It's all good.

 

But, I still cry every day thinking about how he is fading out of my life and it really scares me. Though I wish I knew how he was doing, I have no intentions of breaking NC, because I know it would only make me sad.

 

I just can't believe that we're leading such separate lives now, and that it's possible it will just be like this forever. If I think about it too much, I just start tearing up.

 

And I know that I will get over it, but even that is a horribly scary thought to me. Like he'll just be a picture in a scrapbook.

 

 

I'm sorry you're feeling this way Panda. It is sad, and it's true. It hurts to be so connected to someone, and then be cut out of their life so suddenly and completely.

 

I was talking to a girl I know about my breakup and she asked if my ex was my best friend. We hadn't been together long enough for me to feel comfortable saying to other people that she was, but in my heart and mind she was quickly becoming just that. The girl I was talking to then told me that I need to become my own best friend for a while. I like that idea.

 

Maybe you could be your own best friend for a bit. Buy yourself some new clothes. Dress sexy for yourself. Take yourself out to eat. Love yourself, because you're a loveable person

[benB]

I am feeling the same way, she was my best friend and knew me better than anyone on this Earth. Four years of dating and in a little over a month we are basically strangers. It is a hard thing to overcome for me.

[Username37]

I feel ya. Sharing your life with someone, planning a future, saying "I love you and will never leave you" to them and all of a sudden...all of it. Gone. Like you never had it.

 

It's so painful. And it's even more painful because the person that you loved wanted out.

 

Damn dumpers....ruining lives..

[pandagirl]

But who knows what's to come of it. I still have the glimpse of hope, but I do realize that in the end, if nothing comes of this, I can only be doing more damage to myself then good by continuing talking to him. But I don't feel ready yet to completely stop talking to him... I don't know what it is inside of me saying telling me that I am not ready to let go. It's crazy because i've NEVER been like this with any of my other exes. Maybe that's why I feel like I just can't let go.

 

I am very happy to hear that you are doing well Panda!! It is great to hear that you are focusing on yourself!! But I am also so sorry to know that you are crying everyday!! You have been so strong Panda and I truly admire your strength! Keep your head up!!

 

I understand, but sometimes you have to let go, so it can come back. You can't hold people. I really think people find their way back to each other if they are right for each other.

 

As for myself, I'll be fine. But I love him and miss him a lot.

 

I was talking to a girl I know about my breakup and she asked if my ex was my best friend. We hadn't been together long enough for me to feel comfortable saying to other people that she was, but in my heart and mind she was quickly becoming just that. The girl I was talking to then told me that I need to become my own best friend for a while. I like that idea.

 

Maybe you could be your own best friend for a bit. Buy yourself some new clothes. Dress sexy for yourself. Take yourself out to eat. Love yourself, because you're a loveable person

 

Aw, thanks.

 

Guys tell me I'm attractive, people seem to really like me, and I do dress well. I have everything going to for me. I know I do. But, man. I wish my ex was here to share all those things with.

 

When we broke up, I told him: "But... you're one of my best friends! What am I going to do? " And he said,: "You're MY best friend!"

 

[D-Lish]

Panda,

 

On my death bed, I know my scrapbook will include a myriad of men I once loved/lost/left, etc- and so will yours.

 

You're the girl in someone else's scapbook too, don't forget that.

[pandagirl]

Panda,

 

On my death bed, I know my scrapbook will include a myriad of men I once loved/lost/left, etc- and so will yours.

 

You're the girl in someone else's scapbook too, don't forget that.

 

First, your avatar is hilarious! I should buy one of those!

 

Yes, I am. I hope I am.

 

Sometimes I don't think I'm cut out for relationships or dating. I take everything too much to heart. And while some people can just shutdown or ignore feelings or carelessly treat others poorly, I am the exact opposite. Everything goes so deep with me, because I care too much.

[D-Lish]

First, your avatar is hilarious! I should buy one of those!

 

Yes, I am. I hope I am.

 

Sometimes I don't think I'm cut out for relationships or dating. I take everything too much to heart. And while some people can just shutdown or ignore feelings or carelessly treat others poorly, I am the exact opposite. Everything goes so deep with me, because I care too much.

 

(The boyfriend pillow thing is hilarious...lol.) Maybe it's my destiny:D.

 

Come on girl, we've had many a converstions about this...

You let go in a way with this guy that was actually a surprise to me- you've always claimed you weren't capable- yet you went there.

 

Meh- you were capable.

 

You can do it again, and you will. There will be a guy that comes along that inspires you to post in "dating" instead of "break ups" again. I promise you.

[jeff2321]

 

When we broke up, I told him: "But... you're one of my best friends! What am I going to do? " And he said,: "You're MY best friend!"

 

 

The same thing happened to me. When my ex broke up with me, she was walking out saying... "The hardest part about leaving you is that you are my best friend". Totally stabbed me in the heart hearing that...

 

I'm going on I think about 24 days now of NC, though I'm starting to lose count. I've been going to salsa dancing every night to try and keep my mind off of her and staying busy. I have my good days and bad days though still.

 

I honestly know how you feel and I wonder if my ex is having some of the same thoughts about me as you are about your ex. I'm in complete NC ( not even facebook) so I have no idea what she is doing... or if she has even found a new guy yet. I don't even want to know if she has found a new guy and I won't ever ask or check her FB page again to find out. I'm basically looking at the whole situation like she died and that there is no going back...

 

Hang in there and know you aren't the only one feeling the way you're feeling. I'm basically at this point a functional wreck ( i.e. I go to work and go out but inside I'm a wreck ).

 

Jeff

[smk]

Day 19 of NC and 29 days since we broke up.

 

I'm actually doing pretty well. I know it was for the best that we parted ways. We don't hate each other. We still love each other. There is no bitterness. I'm excited because I am focusing on myself more, and motivated to get my life in order once again. It's all good.

 

But, I still cry every day thinking about how he is fading out of my life and it really scares me. Though I wish I knew how he was doing, I have no intentions of breaking NC, because I know it would only make me sad.

 

I just can't believe that we're leading such separate lives now, and that it's possible it will just be like this forever. If I think about it too much, I just start tearing up.

 

And I know that I will get over it, but even that is a horribly scary thought to me. Like he'll just be a picture in a scrapbook .

 

Hey Panda,

 

Your post is truly from the heart.

 

I can relate to that and I am sure at one point we have all felt the exact same emotion and its scary.

 

I know it scares the heck out of me too and it shattered me to the core. 3.5 months ago she was my world, yet now we dont speak. She was my rock, the person I could tell anything and everything too, my closest confidant, and that one person who never judged, she was simply my everything.

 

There still isnt a day that goes by where I dont think of her, and I truly do wish and hope that one day in the future if our paths do cross again then we can truly be the best of friends like we once were. Off everything I lost when the relationship ended the most important one was losing my best friend, and its truly a sad, heart breaking feeling.

 

But you know what i realised that sometimes 2 people simply are not meant to be, no matter how we feel when the relationship ends, sometimes its just not meant to be and we have to take the lessons learnt and move forward. Most importantly we have the memories to cherish, the good times to look back upon, and just keep walking down that path called life...

 

You seem to be at the right place and keep it up...

[pandagirl]

(The boyfriend pillow thing is hilarious...lol.) Maybe it's my destiny:D.

 

Come on girl, we've had many a converstions about this...

You let go in a way with this guy that was actually a surprise to me- you've always claimed you weren't capable- yet you went there.

 

Meh- you were capable.

 

You can do it again, and you will. There will be a guy that comes along that inspires you to post in "dating" instead of "break ups" again. I promise you.

 

I know, I know...! Someone else will come along. I think the whole for me is bittersweet, because we never even got a chance to be together because of the distance. Everything we talked about doing together, we never did, and now never will. It's like, we never got really share our love together... and that makes me sad.

 

Hey Panda,

 

Your post is truly from the heart.

 

I can relate to that and I am sure at one point we have all felt the exact same emotion and its scary.

 

I know it scares the heck out of me too and it shattered me to the core. 3.5 months ago she was my world, yet now we dont speak. She was my rock, the person I could tell anything and everything too, my closest confidant, and that one person who never judged, she was simply my everything.

 

There still isnt a day that goes by where I dont think of her, and I truly do wish and hope that one day in the future if our paths do cross again then we can truly be the best of friends like we once were. Off everything I lost when the relationship ended the most important one was losing my best friend, and its truly a sad, heart breaking feeling.

 

But you know what i realised that sometimes 2 people simply are not meant to be, no matter how we feel when the relationship ends, sometimes its just not meant to be and we have to take the lessons learnt and move forward. Most importantly we have the memories to cherish, the good times to look back upon, and just keep walking down that path called life...

 

You seem to be at the right place and keep it up...

 

I'm willing to accept whatever happens. I am in a good place, but like I said in the above reply to Dlish, I just feel like we never even got a chance.