TomerT Posted September 29, 2010 Posted September 29, 2010 Long story - short. My x-gf broke up with me (on Skype) one week after she left to 1.5 months vacation to her country. I want to mention that although we had our problems and may be were not the perfect couple, we loved each other, and even had sex just one hour before she left (if it means something nowadays). My point that she left as my "legitimate" gf. So, after one week she asked me for time and space, which I unarguably accepted, without begging, clinging or anything like this. So after that we were not in contact for almost 4 weeks (I also went abroad for 2 weeks during this time) and respected what she asked for (although I was dying to talk with her, couldn't stop thinking about her for a second, was going to toilet with my phone and frankly was even crying...but she didn't know anything of this). So eventually, I came to airport to meet her, naively thinking she will be nicely surprised, but she came back with her last X-bf (from last 3 years relationship, btw she always swear to me that there is nothing left between them). \ Day after I get known (from her mum) that she also (accidentally and probably unwanted) pregnant from him. Day after she called me crying saying she is confused, don't know what happened and saying that she didn't cheated on me. Also she accused me that all this happened, because I so easiy accepted her break up suggestion and didn't contact her all this time - she felt unwanted and pushed away. So my question are: 1) Does she has a point - did I contributeto this mess ? Apparently if I was acting differenly all of this might not have been happen. On the other hand, I simply repsected her wish. 2) Is she cheated on me ? Again, apparently, not - she asked for a break and during this time she is a free person and can do whatever she wants with whoever she wants. But still, for some reason - I feel cheated. I was expecting from her at least to talk to me, before she decided to get back to her last bf. Apparenlty she owes me nothing, but still, is it too much to ask from someone who just few weeks ago was talking about having children together ? Your insight much appreciated
Angel1111 Posted September 29, 2010 Posted September 29, 2010 I think you're really asking the wrong question but if you need an answer, no, it's not cheating if you're broken up. In her case, I believe the break-up was pre-meditated and I think she intended to get back with this other guy. She was probably even discussing that with him before her trip, or was at least talking to him in some way before she left. It's good that she broke up with you first, I suppose, but as far as I'm concerned, her actions still don't speak very well of her. Plus, she's pregnant with this guy's baby? This is a complete showstopper, if you ask me. Walk away. I know it's hard but you need to walk away from this because she's confused and doesn't know what she wants. I think she's just getting a kick out of having two guys chase after her; or the other guy is totally pissed off that she's pregnant and doesn't want to have anything to do with her. Don't let her think that you were the cause of this just because you didn't make a big deal out of the break-up. SHE broke up with you. Yes, women like to hear from a guy when a situation has gone bad or when he has hurt her, but this was her decision. I'm not sure what she expected of you. Let's say at one point you did let her know how much it was hurting you. I'd bet money that it would've backfired on you. This girl just sounds really immature but I'm sorry you're hurting so much and I'm sorry she did this to you.
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