juand Posted September 28, 2010 Posted September 28, 2010 Hi everyone, I need some help please. My gf of two years broke up with me two weeks ago and since then has not made any attempts to contact me. The only times we have talked is because i have texted her or tried to get in touch with her, three time the most. She broke up with me because we were fighting alot due to the fact that she was going out and would not ask me to go along. I would argue with her about where she was going and what was going on and more. our relationship was great just a month ago, but, always a problem when she went out because she didnt like to tell me where she was going. Now, a couple of days ago i texted her and asked her how she was doing, and she replied "doing good and you?" i told her i missed her alot and she said I MISS YA TOO, DONT HATE ME PLEASE IM JUST TRYING TO FIGURE OUT MY LIFE. Now I am lost and idk what to do.... I love her and i dont want to lose her. what can i do to make her miss me, she knows i would do antyhing for her, what can i do now?
grungesponge Posted September 28, 2010 Posted September 28, 2010 Sadly you can't do anything to maker her miss you. Either she will or she has moved on and she won't. You can sure do a lot to drive her further away though. Just leave her alone and if she wants to come back she will, but don't hold out much hope cause it hardly ever happens. Based on her behavior I don't think she was in to you much and you are better off without her. Breakups are tough. Keep your head up and don't beat yourself up about it.
Author juand Posted September 28, 2010 Author Posted September 28, 2010 Yeah i guess ill just give her all the space she wants. I am confused because through out our whole relationship she was great always caring very lovely, always there, just a month ago she would be texting me at all times and saying i miss u and i love u, but it all changed after the break up.
grungesponge Posted September 28, 2010 Posted September 28, 2010 Well you said she was also going out god knows where and keeping it from you so this girl is no saint. Think about how much stress she put you through because of that stuff. You are looking through rose colored glasses and not seeing her for who she truly was. Why would she hide that from you? Because she was up to no good. Now you know not to tolerate that in your next relationship. It is a huge warning sign that you are about to get burned.
Ajax Posted September 28, 2010 Posted September 28, 2010 I am confused because through out our whole relationship she was great always caring very lovely, always there, just a month ago she would be texting me at all times and saying i miss u and i love u, but it all changed after the break up. Funny how things tend to turn on a dime isn't it? I think some people can just "switch off" their emotions. With most people though, once they're over someone they're over them. It's hard to accept that someone who you were so close to no longer wants you in their life. I'm slowly coming to accept that I'm probably never going to talk to my ex again. I might see her at my friend's wedding a year from now, but by then I'm sure my feelings for her will have faded (I hope). All you can do at this point is do what's best for you. Take care of yourself. reinvent yourself. Spend time with friends and family. And when you feel sad, let yourself feel the emotions.
Author juand Posted September 28, 2010 Author Posted September 28, 2010 it is really funny how ppl can change. I do not understand how it can be so easy for someone to do so. Ajax this is very hard, everything i see makes me think of her, i definately need to move on i guess. Its just hard to so, i keep telling my self she might come back. Hopefully a year from now when you see your ex at the wedding it wont hurt you anymore and hopefully then my feelings would have faded for this girl as well.
Ajax Posted September 28, 2010 Posted September 28, 2010 it is really funny how ppl can change. I do not understand how it can be so easy for someone to do so. Ajax this is very hard, everything i see makes me think of her, i definately need to move on i guess. Its just hard to so, i keep telling my self she might come back. Hopefully a year from now when you see your ex at the wedding it wont hurt you anymore and hopefully then my feelings would have faded for this girl as well. I know how you feel. About two months before she left me she helped me move into a new place. We decorated it together, bought things together, cooked my first meal here together... she made this place home. When she left I had to get rid of everything we'd gotten. All I had to do was look at her toothbrush in the bathroom and I'd fall on the floor and cry. It all had to go. Now there's nothing left of her here, but it's not home anymore. It's just a place I sleep and keep some stuff. Part of my own coping process involves me acting as if she were dead. I still love her, and will keep the memories, and it still hurts, but she's gone. What makes it somewhat easier to believe is that in fact the person she was that I loved is gone. I've talked to friends about her and they say she's changed. She's not the same person, and I think that that's more common than not after breakups. I don't know what your exact situation is and I don't know your ex, but take a good long close look at her now and see if you recognize her anymore. If not, mourn who she was and maybe it'll help you move on.
Author juand Posted September 28, 2010 Author Posted September 28, 2010 I definately see what u mean. In my case i helped her move into her apt which she rents from my parents. we decorated it together and cooked her first meal together. it was all great, until she began to feel as if she was young and was missing out on all those times. I argued a bunch of times with that because of that. she was not bad, she would go out and always come back, she would always stay in touch until i would fight with her, then she would ignore me and just stay out. Now i found out that she removed all of our pictures and put them away and she threw away all of my personal stuff "like toothbrush, etc etc" I feel as if i drove her away because of my actions and not trusting her. After all of my suffering this two weeks i have learned alot and know that i must change if its for her or someone in my future. I jsut dont know wether she is over it or not, or if she is just lost, stressed and confused on what to do with her life. her mom recently texted me and said "We want you to know that we do not hate you, she was very worried and afraid that that's what you thought" It makes me think that she cares about what i think about her family... idk whats going on..
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