Bren91 Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 I seriously can not cope feeling like this anymore. I feel like I'm getting worse not better, before I've been happy sometimes but now I've hit the all time low and can't stop crying. I'm still talking to my ex, do you think thats the problem? But i really don't want to cut him off, I love talking to him and we do want to get back together at some point. I feel so lost and alone, I don't know what to do. I don't know how to be happy again This is so frustrating but I can't just let go and not talk to him. How can I still keep talking to him and feel good at the same time? Please help.
tinybear5 Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 im on your same boat. i have my ups and downs.. we still talk. dont wanna cut eachother out...want to try to be friends.....idk what were doing . I think of it this way , if its meant to be, it'll be . simple as that.
brainblox Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 You will cope and if you don't want to cut him out your life and you feel it's better he stays in your life and he agrees then no problem. The reason I don't want my ex in my life is I want to move on and by being part of her life won't allow me to do that. We all felt the pain of rejection to some degree and my pain eased when I accepted I had to move on without being friends for now, maybe forever ? It seems to me that you guys are miles away from that which is fair enough but don't get stuck in a rut to the detriment of your health, family and friends. You may miss someone who is perfect for you if you stay in mourning too long. B strong !
Ajax Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 It's been five weeks since my ex broke up with me and three weeks since we last spoke. I was doing better up until a few days ago, but now I feel like I'm being sucked back down into the pit. I want to move on, but it seems that every day I miss her more. As much as I want another chance, the more time that goes by the less I feel like that's going to happen. Sure, three weeks isn't that long, but when you're in the middle of it and you don't know if you'll ever hear from them again, it's an eternity. As for coping, I don't know what to tell you. The common wisdome doesn't seem to be helping me. I'm taking classes, excersising, and spending time with friends but somehow I still miss her. Just know that other people are going through the same things you are.
Trovador Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 Yep, taking to him is the catalyst of all those sad feelings, you'd want more than just talking, or more exactly, talking because you two are an item... but reality is different... On the other hand, NC is so hard and unfair... What I am doing now is trying to get the best of NC and LC... we talk but I am pulling away, I am moving on while still having a small doses of her (truth be said, the need of being in contact with her is smaller every day)... in fact, I am reversing the usual scenario: she is helping me to get over... In other words, I am pulling the "Vanishing Act", it's the only thing that seems to be working right now...
brainblox Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 On the other hand, NC is so hard and unfair... If staying in contact with a person that no longer has the desire to be with you intimately is okay with you then go for it ! I would be fool enough to take my ex back in second and while I'm feeling like this I will never contact her, We feel great when we receive contact but how long does that feeling last,we realise it's not platonic contact we crave...we miss the full on contact of our old relationship and by staying in contact all we do is disappoint ourselves IMO.
Trovador Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 You are right, but it is infinitely worse when you break NC and feel like **** Now, tell me you have been stronger than us...
brainblox Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 You are right, but it is infinitely worse when you break NC and feel like **** Now, tell me you have been stronger than us... I'm stronger now! Hey I tried to be friends within weeks of our split and we even sat down and had a drink together, she wanted to us to be friends that night and I wanted us to be lovers still so it ended up with me getting drunk and telling her she had the warmth of a dead fish. We tried again two weeks later and I couldn't handle how cool she was about us not being together so I got my jacket, wished her well and that was 4 and a bit weeks ago. I accept she may never be part of my life again and if she is it will never be the same ! we live and learn.
Trovador Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 Kudos to you, man! My goal is the same as you, to get over my ex as soon as possible... however, she and I are coworkers, so hardcore NC hasn't worked well... that is the reason of my approach now, but definitely talking to an ex is living on the edge, specially if they still flirt (or you believe they are) with you...
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